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Favorite NPC one-liners?

  • Hypertionb14_ESO
    Hypertionb14_ESO
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    "STRANGER STRANGER STRANGER" - NPC quest giver in Deshaan

    every time i started that quest i laughed and facepalmed...

    and each time it struck me that "am i really helping someone like this?"
    I play every class in every situation. I love them all.
  • AaronMB
    AaronMB
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    "You look like I need another drink."
  • Garetth
    Garetth
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    "Your face could curdle milk"

    -Guard in Reapers March
  • Woolenthreads
    Woolenthreads
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    There's an Ordinator quote in Mournhold "What are the Altmer so proud of? They're just arrogant, ancestor-worshipping fools" or something along those lines (I'll have to hang around Mournhold when I get home to write it out).
    Oooh look, lot's of Butterflies! Wait! Butterflies? Get out of here Sheo, stop bugging me!

    Having issues with Provisioning Writs? A list of problem Writs and people willing to help in game can be found in this Thread
  • Merlin13KAGL
    Merlin13KAGL
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    KenjiJU wrote: »
    "Have you ever heard the phrase..."

    @KenjiJU, aren't you a brave one.

    OP, it's between:

    "I don't like to drink....I...like to drink."

    and

    "This one knows you had hoped for something more personal."
    Just because you don't like the way something is doesn't necessarily make it wrong...

    Earn it.

    IRL'ing for a while for assorted reasons, in forum, and in game.
    I am neither warm, nor fuzzy...
    Probably has checkbox on Customer Service profile that say High Aggro, 99% immunity to BS
  • Esha76
    Esha76
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    "So you're the one who saved the queen aye??? You don't look that special." - Random AD guards.

    Only once I heard a female Nord in Eastmarch say to me sarcastically: "So I heard you touched a glowing egg and talked to a tree... Must have been strange."

    "Who wants to see how hard I can punch!??!" - Randon drunken Nord.

    I've had one of my personal favorite in my signature for some time: "I don't know why I bother guarding you horrible people...." A personal guard to 2 Dunmer snobby chicks.

    Anything by Raz, Naryu, and Irrai the Twighlight as well.
    "There is no moisture in your angry stares." - Laughs-at-All
    "I don't know why I bother guarding you horrible people." - Orama Sadas
    "Scales here is about to have a really bad day..." - Valeric
    "Just tell me what you're doing here before I turn your heart into a tomato..." - Sereyne
    "Break those rocks! Dig those ditches! Why??? Because I want you to!!!" - Ifriz the Unraveller
    "There are worse masters than I. Far worse." - Molag Bal
    "I humiliated the Daedra in Mehrunes Spite." - You, when turning in a specific Undaunted Daily.
    "I'm not finding you very pleasant!" - Adla the Brewer
    "Old Ri'hirr likes his birds slow and stupid!" - Old Ri'hirr
    "When things get dirty... Oh, I get so flustered." - Meredil the Archivist
    "Too many Argonians about these days..." - Davon's Watch Guard (though I think this one has been removed from game)
  • Merlin13KAGL
    Merlin13KAGL
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    Esha76 wrote: »
    Anything by Raz, Naryu, and Irrai the Twighlight as well.

    "You have to find joy where you can." ;)

    Just because you don't like the way something is doesn't necessarily make it wrong...

    Earn it.

    IRL'ing for a while for assorted reasons, in forum, and in game.
    I am neither warm, nor fuzzy...
    Probably has checkbox on Customer Service profile that say High Aggro, 99% immunity to BS
  • Esha76
    Esha76
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    Esha76 wrote: »
    Anything by Raz, Naryu, and Irrai the Twighlight as well.

    "You have to find joy where you can." ;)

    Yep! Exactly! LOL! And the actress who did her... they really need to keep giving her work. She nailed that character perfectly. I do hope to see that character and actress return in future content.
    "There is no moisture in your angry stares." - Laughs-at-All
    "I don't know why I bother guarding you horrible people." - Orama Sadas
    "Scales here is about to have a really bad day..." - Valeric
    "Just tell me what you're doing here before I turn your heart into a tomato..." - Sereyne
    "Break those rocks! Dig those ditches! Why??? Because I want you to!!!" - Ifriz the Unraveller
    "There are worse masters than I. Far worse." - Molag Bal
    "I humiliated the Daedra in Mehrunes Spite." - You, when turning in a specific Undaunted Daily.
    "I'm not finding you very pleasant!" - Adla the Brewer
    "Old Ri'hirr likes his birds slow and stupid!" - Old Ri'hirr
    "When things get dirty... Oh, I get so flustered." - Meredil the Archivist
    "Too many Argonians about these days..." - Davon's Watch Guard (though I think this one has been removed from game)
  • Merlin13KAGL
    Merlin13KAGL
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    Esha76 wrote: »
    Esha76 wrote: »
    Anything by Raz, Naryu, and Irrai the Twighlight as well.

    "You have to find joy where you can." ;)

    Yep! Exactly! LOL! And the actress who did her... they really need to keep giving her work. She nailed that character perfectly. I do hope to see that character and actress return in future content.

    @Esha76

    Absolutely one of the best played characters in the game. (Far better than slow-speak-Azura, which was quite disappointing. (Where is the ominous voice from TES III?))

    Had just the right amount of attitude and 0-to-crazy in 2.3 seconds to fit the characters perfectly.
    Almost offed her on autopilot when the barked at me "Do it! I spent a thousand years..."
    When the game elicits a direct emotional response from the player, it's spot on.

    Just because you don't like the way something is doesn't necessarily make it wrong...

    Earn it.

    IRL'ing for a while for assorted reasons, in forum, and in game.
    I am neither warm, nor fuzzy...
    Probably has checkbox on Customer Service profile that say High Aggro, 99% immunity to BS
  • bugsplat_nz
    bugsplat_nz
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    From a bank guard in Rawl'kha: "If your gonna climb the ugly tree - trim the lower branches first!"
  • Armitas
    Armitas
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    "War doesn't build character, it reveals it".
    Retired.
    Nord mDK
  • tinythinker
    tinythinker
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    I was in The Rift (in the city of Riften) playing a female Argonian character who was riding past a guard who said, "So tell me, are (young?) Argonian maidens really..." I was riding fast and missed the end of his comment, though.
    Experienced, new, returner? Help keep ESO's community strong ᕙ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ᕗ -- share what you love about the game, offer constructive feedback, and make friends.ʕ·ᴥ·ʔ

    . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

    Who are you in Tamriel (whether it's just your character's attitude & style or a full backstory)? - Share your Character's Story! ◔ ⌣ ◔
    (And let us know 🔷What Kind of Roleplayer You Are🔷 - even if that only extends to choosing your race)


    . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

    Support Mudcrab Mode for ESO (\/)!_!(\/) - part joke, part serious, all glorious! You butter be ready for this
  • bugsplat_nz
    bugsplat_nz
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    Vicecanon Hrondar (Nord) "I miss the days of kicking arse. Now I'm expected to kiss them"
  • Tekalynn
    Tekalynn
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    I was in The Rift (in the city of Riften) playing a female Argonian character who was riding past a guard who said, "So tell me, are (young?) Argonian maidens really..." I was riding fast and missed the end of his comment, though.

    I think he finishes "...you know." There's a significant pause between "really" and "you know".
  • Rumba1
    Rumba1
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    Female Bosmer guard in Rawl ka (sp?) Reapers March who says:

    "come again when you can't stay so long"

    as you pass by.
  • Kashiwagi
    Kashiwagi
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    "If you have nothing to say, say nothing".
    The wisdom of those words gets me :)

    A quote from Mark Twain, told by some Khajiit in AD territory.
  • goodexample
    goodexample
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    "Now that's a lizard I could wrap my fingers around." - Neer (in Murkwater).

    Had to read that twice before i realized how funny that is x)
    Someone has a dirty mind at the zenidev office.
  • tinythinker
    tinythinker
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    "I erect the spine of...er...inebriation." - guest at The Manor of Revelry, Coldharbor.
    Experienced, new, returner? Help keep ESO's community strong ᕙ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ᕗ -- share what you love about the game, offer constructive feedback, and make friends.ʕ·ᴥ·ʔ

    . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

    Who are you in Tamriel (whether it's just your character's attitude & style or a full backstory)? - Share your Character's Story! ◔ ⌣ ◔
    (And let us know 🔷What Kind of Roleplayer You Are🔷 - even if that only extends to choosing your race)


    . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

    Support Mudcrab Mode for ESO (\/)!_!(\/) - part joke, part serious, all glorious! You butter be ready for this
  • Tomg999
    Tomg999
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    I kinda like the drunk woman in Coldharbour who says (to my female char) "You look familiar. Were we flirting just a little while ago?" I did stop by and see her after she relocated to the Hollow City.
  • tinythinker
    tinythinker
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    "Too many Argonians about these days; makes me nervous." - heard in the Davon's Watch branch of the Mages Guild on Halloween as an all-Argonian guild was meeting up their to show their costumes. There were indeed quite a few Argonians about...
    Experienced, new, returner? Help keep ESO's community strong ᕙ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ᕗ -- share what you love about the game, offer constructive feedback, and make friends.ʕ·ᴥ·ʔ

    . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

    Who are you in Tamriel (whether it's just your character's attitude & style or a full backstory)? - Share your Character's Story! ◔ ⌣ ◔
    (And let us know 🔷What Kind of Roleplayer You Are🔷 - even if that only extends to choosing your race)


    . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

    Support Mudcrab Mode for ESO (\/)!_!(\/) - part joke, part serious, all glorious! You butter be ready for this
  • KenjiJU
    KenjiJU
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    GRELL!
  • rysc
    rysc
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    I didn't see it listed so forgive me if I repeat but in Craglorn last night, I heard a guard say something like, "If you were to speak your mind, would you be speechless?"
    Rysc
    37 toons and counting since go live, I may need an intervention.
  • Whisper292
    Whisper292
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    "A little less drilling and little more action would suit me just fine." Daggerfall guard


    "They say an undead werewolf attacked Camlorn. An undead . . . werewolf? How does that even work?"
    ---
    Love all, trust few, do wrong to no one. - William Shakespeare
  • tinythinker
    tinythinker
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    Visit the Crossroads Tavern in Belkarth (Craglorn) and speak to the drunken Argonian named Laughs-at-Turtles who is staggering about the place. He has several potential responses that would fit in this thread.
    Experienced, new, returner? Help keep ESO's community strong ᕙ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ᕗ -- share what you love about the game, offer constructive feedback, and make friends.ʕ·ᴥ·ʔ

    . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

    Who are you in Tamriel (whether it's just your character's attitude & style or a full backstory)? - Share your Character's Story! ◔ ⌣ ◔
    (And let us know 🔷What Kind of Roleplayer You Are🔷 - even if that only extends to choosing your race)


    . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

    Support Mudcrab Mode for ESO (\/)!_!(\/) - part joke, part serious, all glorious! You butter be ready for this
  • tinythinker
    tinythinker
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    Someone stole his sweetroll...

    (Which apparently was laced with something really strong)stolemysweetroll1.png
    stolemysweetroll2.png
    Experienced, new, returner? Help keep ESO's community strong ᕙ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ᕗ -- share what you love about the game, offer constructive feedback, and make friends.ʕ·ᴥ·ʔ

    . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

    Who are you in Tamriel (whether it's just your character's attitude & style or a full backstory)? - Share your Character's Story! ◔ ⌣ ◔
    (And let us know 🔷What Kind of Roleplayer You Are🔷 - even if that only extends to choosing your race)


    . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

    Support Mudcrab Mode for ESO (\/)!_!(\/) - part joke, part serious, all glorious! You butter be ready for this
  • kewl
    kewl
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    XUKPFAt.png
    XSk3nz8.png
  • tinythinker
    tinythinker
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    Recently I've been enjoying the messages from clicking on the Argonian guards in Cyrodiil...

    "Proper behavior is like an egg that hatches good citizenship."

    Experienced, new, returner? Help keep ESO's community strong ᕙ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ᕗ -- share what you love about the game, offer constructive feedback, and make friends.ʕ·ᴥ·ʔ

    . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

    Who are you in Tamriel (whether it's just your character's attitude & style or a full backstory)? - Share your Character's Story! ◔ ⌣ ◔
    (And let us know 🔷What Kind of Roleplayer You Are🔷 - even if that only extends to choosing your race)


    . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

    Support Mudcrab Mode for ESO (\/)!_!(\/) - part joke, part serious, all glorious! You butter be ready for this
  • kargen27
    kargen27
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    "Am I drunk, or is it just me?"
    and then the parrot said, "must be the water mines green too."
  • renton1x1x1
    renton1x1x1
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    Vanus galerion saying "i'm now going to cast an amazingly awesome spell"
    Renton Sc Breton Sorcerer VR14
    Renton Tp Argonian Templar VR14
    Renton Dk Imperial DragonKnight VR14
    Renton Nb Khajiit Nightblade VR10 Vampire

    www.alitheso.com Casual Social EU PvX Guild

    Ebonheart Pact EU PVP Decimation Elite Azura's Star
    The Traveling Merchant
    http://forums.elderscrollsonline.com/en-GB/discussion/190077/the-traveling-merchant-eu-craglorn-trading-guild

    So let me get this straight: You want to ride on a magic carpet to see the king of the potato people and beg with him for your freedom. And you're telling me that you're completely sane? - Rimmer - Red Dwarf V - Quarantine
  • kargen27
    kargen27
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    I've had just enough to render you handsome.

    and

    I'll have...what I'm having.
    and then the parrot said, "must be the water mines green too."
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