I avoid pvp as it tends to be the most egotistical and toxic of the community.

My face playing ESO

-_-

AlanTheDragonLord wrote: »

It's just pixels on the screen. There are other, more important things that are worth getting upset about. But not pixels.

I just dont comprehend this type of thinking. This makes absolutely no sense to me. Real life is just atoms. Your point being that as long as something happens on a PC/digitally it has no emotional value? For me its all equally strong emotions, doesn't matter if they are onscreen, irl, face to face with someone - its all experiences.

emotions? why should i care about words from a random dude in a online game? it makes me smile when people take game too seriously

I keep a silky handkerchief (treasure item) in my bag and when someone sends me a snarky message I usually send them a link to the hanky and tell them to dry their tears. I get awful comments back almost every time but I can laugh about those because I caused them. Twice I got an unexpected good response after sending the handkerchief. For the most part though lots of swearing.

PvP becomes much more fun when you get over the dying part and decide all the negative messages are from 13 year olds that broke into their parents liquor cabinet for the first time. I know that probably isn't true but thinking that of them makes me smile and move on. Other than the handkerchief bit I usually don't respond at all and don't let them take up any more of my time.

I don't really control emotions in PvP if I saw someone playing without honor No honor - killing someone who is busy with NPCs or especially boss, ruining someone's good fight, tbagging someone after a good fight. Those who do such things to people who didn't do same things to them before, have all these things returned to them.

I remember one red stamplar whom I accidentally met, we dueled and I killed him after rather short fight. I didn't know him, it was ok fight so he got no signs of disrespect from me. And I would have forgotten about this fight, if later that day he wasn't part of red group who was zerging any other player in their path - and after I died to that group, he tbagged me... So now he wants to do the boss solo, or do some questing in city, or have a duel?

Just today I met certain blue dk who doesn't start fighting when he's alone, but always joins when his allies team up. I was taking the flag at Arena, when I saw 3 blues approaching, and that guy was among them. I tried to survive their attack, then I was very surprised to see arrival of my ally who joined the fight When that blue dk saw that his allies are dead, he started to run away fast. Not on my watch! I chased him through whole district. He was sprinting and dodging away. I was trying to keep up, but I needed to save some stamina cause I didn't want to reach him without resource left for actual fight. And just as he was about to use the door to another district and I needed to interrupt this, one nasty cowardly red (yes, I met this red many times before, so he would be my focus as well) started to protect him. While I was dealing with red, blue got away The feels!

The only thing I don't do even when I'm really mad at enemy - I never whisper bad things For some reason, I never had desire to start a conversation with unpleasant enemy.
With honorable enemies, we can say to each other that it was a good fight and even discuss the gear which we wear.

jircris11 wrote: »

I avoid pvp as it tends to be the most egotistical and toxic of the community.

The end game raiding community is far more egocentric and toxic in my experience. By a lot.

Close the chat box or just ignore it. You will always and I mean always see someone talking smack about someone else's damage/skill/build. There are a lot of players with inferiority complexes in the game.

If you get bagged, just laugh. If you get a hate tell, just laugh. If someone calls you trash, just laugh. If you have a guy like you did before tell you that you should be getting more kills, just laugh. Point is, have fun in pvp. If you find yourself getting frustrated about your build, other players, the servers being well, the servers, just step away from the game for a bit. Play something else until you’ve calmed down.

Remember, it’s a video game, you should play it to have fun. If you wanna be competitive, be competitive with yourself and not with everyone else. If you get 5 kills one session, keep focusing on how you got them. Aim for 7 kills the next. If you had 5 deaths one session, learn how your build can counteract the damage you took. Aim for less the next time. Understand that it’s ok to be learning a build. It’s ok to mess up and lose fights. It’s ok to be worse than someone else. As long as YOU are enjoying yourself, that’s all that matters. Who cares what everyone else thinks of you.

Know that you will have off days where you’ll lose more fights then you win. You’ll make more mistakes than you should, and you may even have ricky the random call you trash, say you should get more kills than you should, tell you to stop pvp’ing, etc. Man who gives a (snip)what they think. What matters is that YOU enjoy your time in pvp. YOU enjoy your build, a build you theory crafted YOURSELF. The moment you start caring what people think of you on the game, especially in pvp, is the moment they win.

So keep getting out there. Keep theory crafting builds and learn to laugh. Step away if you find yourself getting frustrated, it works wonders, and remember to enjoy the game as much as you can.

(edited for profanity)

Velvetchicken wrote: »

If you get bagged, just laugh. If you get a hate tell, just laugh. If someone calls you trash, just laugh. If you have a guy like you did before tell you that you should be getting more kills, just laugh. Point is, have fun in pvp. If you find yourself getting frustrated about your build, other players, the servers being well, the servers, just step away from the game for a bit. Play something else until you’ve calmed down.

Remember, it’s a video game, you should play it to have fun. If you wanna be competitive, be competitive with yourself and not with everyone else. If you get 5 kills one session, keep focusing on how you got them. Aim for 7 kills the next. If you had 5 deaths one session, learn how your build can counteract the damage you took. Aim for less the next time. Understand that it’s ok to be learning a build. It’s ok to mess up and lose fights. It’s ok to be worse than someone else. As long as YOU are enjoying yourself, that’s all that matters. Who cares what everyone else thinks of you.

Know that you will have off days where you’ll lose more fights then you win. You’ll make more mistakes than you should, and you may even have ricky the random call you trash, say you should get more kills than you should, tell you to stop pvp’ing, etc. Man who gives a shït what they think. What matters is that YOU enjoy your time in pvp. YOU enjoy your build, a build you theory crafted YOURSELF. The moment you start caring what people think of you on the game, especially in pvp, is the moment they win.

So keep getting out there. Keep theory crafting builds and learn to laugh. Step away if you find yourself getting frustrated, it works wonders, and remember to enjoy the game as much as you can.

Thank you for making all these points. I needed to hear that and you legitimately made me smile.

Thanks to all others for your input to!

Not a matter of controlling emotions for me. I work all day solving problems and dealing with people so when I get home I want to relax and watching chat with all the insults and nastiness is just not how I want to spend my time.

Mariusghost84 wrote: »

AlanTheDragonLord wrote: »

It's just pixels on the screen. There are other, more important things that are worth getting upset about. But not pixels.

I just dont comprehend this type of thinking. This makes absolutely no sense to me. Real life is just atoms. Your point being that as long as something happens on a PC/digitally it has no emotional value? For me its all equally strong emotions, doesn't matter if they are onscreen, irl, face to face with someone - its all experiences.

@Mariusghost84

It’s a perspective to take that actually helps you in pvp. I agree with Alan big time on this one.

Think about why the person’s sending the message in the first place. They are angry and venting, or they are doing it to get you off your game. The way to do well in pvp is like sports, stay loose but focused. I bet you’re playing tight and stressed where your play is being effected by your emotions.

I used to see this a lot in pve and pvp. Sub 10% wipes where everything goes off the rails when you’re about to beat a hard encounter, in pvp people lose focus and are all over the place when fighting hard engagements. It’s one of the reasons why the spazzy raid leaders are always in good guilds but never great guilds.

It’s where the expression choking comes from. Focus more on having fun and stay loose and your play will improve.

Well I show myself as offline, so I prevent the flame whispers from the start, if he writes in the group chat you really just can ignore it or put him on your ignore list then it won't show up anymore.

But over time I got so many people against me, that now not my playstyle is the focus of attack, but myself as a person, that really hurts sometimes, especially if entire guilds decide that you should not be able to play in Cyrodiil and start getting all people who played with me in their guild, and forbid them to play with me (Which they can because it is those hardcore guilds that smack anything in Cyro and no one wants to have them as enemy, or you get focussed out of the campaign).
Then they tell the people who played with me it would be nothing against me and if I would do this or that I could play normally again, but to me directly they say: "Isn't it lovely how we push you out of the game without anyone having your back?" And yes thats a real quote.