Wollust wrote: »

Ankael07 wrote: »

Ignore list has a limit of people you can put into. I use this addon to deal with that.

http://www.esoui.com/downloads/info1061-MutePlayer.html

A separate ''mute'' list without a limit.

Tbh, if your ignore list is full it's more than likely that you yourself are the problem. But that's just my opinion.

Have you seen the chats lately? There is very good reason to put that many on ignore.

I have played MMORPGs for 15 years. I've seen some great people, and I've seen some disgusting people. But in that time I think I've only ever been stalked once. When I say stalked, I mean where I actually had to have Customer Service intervene and warn/suspend/ban them. I dunno what happened to them, but they stopped it.

That was back in 2005.

I've had disagreements, fights, arguments, and all the good stuff over the years. I've put people on ignore on occasion and sometimes had to talk to guild leadership about players' actions.

From what I've gathered, harassment isn't rampant. I think what many players are experiencing is getting far too personal with random strangers on the internet. Game or not.. that can be.. annoying at best.. and dangerous at its worst. One thing I've learned in the past 15 years is to keep a certain level of detachment when dealing with online players.

This means keeping personal info and activities to yourself. This doesn't just mean keeping your email address, street address, and such to yourself. But your life experiences as well. Don't tell some person who has been on your friend list about a fight you had with your sister, or your financial status or anything like that. Maybe even keep political/religious beliefs to yourself.

This isn't to say you can't make close friends on the internet. I've got a few who I damn near count as 'regular friends' because we've known each other for over a decade. You can make real friendships and even romantic relationships in some cases. But you've got to be careful. You've got to guard yourself and use personal discipline and vigilance to protect yourself.

I've not had to put someone on ignore in probably two years by following this philosophy.

Someone above say its not right to put the burden on the victims. In most cases they are right. But I've had too many friends and acquaintances who run into harassment issues over and over. This isn't to say they are looking for it, or hanging around the wrong sorts of people. But lets just say, the way they open themselves up to others online tends to attract some ugly people.

If you find yourself being stalked or harassed and it happens a bit too often to be random happenstance. You might want to consider how you are speaking to others. What personal details you're giving out. Hell sometimes you need to keep your gender ambiguous in some groups. That goes for guys as well as girls (I've seen guys get harassed in other games, especially in RP circles).

Understand this isn't foolproof, there ARE going to be creeps out there. Like in my example back in 2005, I had some chick stalking me in WoW. She was cool at first, did some quests, I think maybe a dungeon or two. But she became unrattled when I was questing with a friend of her's when she was offline. Thought I was trying to steal her GF or somesuch. Yeah.. what she thought was a GF was actually a guy and he had no idea wtf she was yammering about. Ending up putting her on ignore and she made new characters to badger me and tried to follow me around. Eventually I just put a ticket in and got some action taken against her. Really weird and I'm leaving a ton of details out because this girl had some real problems, some of which not appropriate for this forum.

Still had that issue despite keeping a normally detached stance. Never got personal with said person, but she sure as hell said alot of stuff about herself. I guess that was a warning sign I didn't see back then. Random or semi-random stranger opens their life story to you after only knowing you online for a day or two.. might be a surefire indication of an estranged individual.

Which sucks because some of us are good people and simply don't want to turn away someone. But like I said, you got to protect yourself online. Its not worth the frustration or embarrassment in some cases.

As far as the garbage in general/zone chats. Got to have a thick skin. Its a PITA to monitor or review a chat where hundreds of players are scrolling it a few hundred lines a minute. Don't worry about some fool on a soapbox. However if they send you a hateful prejudicial whisper/tell/PM, then by all means report them. Bringing up a lit of tells or whispers you've received is easy.

Little story about some of that. The trolls in zone chat are to be pitied. They really are. When I was playing Everquest about a year and a half ago on the newer Vox server. There was a troll that used to try and rile people up. Day after day he would do this. He'd say EQ sucked and other inane stuff saying other games were better. Obvious troll basically.

There was one day were he was particularly vocal. And I guess most people did actually ignore him because the responses were less and less. Eventually it got later in the evening and he started his BS again. No one responded. So he went a bit more heated with it. No one responded. He began typing more and more stuff into the chat, varying the topics ranging from the classes, to the server, to the game itself and other games and outside stuff. No one was taking the bait.

It literally looked like he was getting desperate. I was working up poison crafting on my rogue while in PoK while this guy was doing this and thought it was weird. But then he said something of the lines of "why isn't anyone talking to me?" That I really took notice. No one responded still, it was a bit later so there probably wasn't many on. And then he eventually said screw it and logged off. Normally you think such trolls don't care one way or another. But I think many of them do have attention issues. I'd almost felt bad for the guy. Almost. He made his choice. Let him live with it.

I had one time when I picked someone up from zone chat and a guildie for a dungeon then qued for a healer. We get one then we get to the dungeon and almost immediately the zone chat guy whispers me and tells me, "hey kick the healer, he low cp and i got a buddy who wants in." I say, "ok. . ." And kick the zone chat guy instead. He whispers me after and tells me "good job ***, good luck losing the dungeon."

So we end up getting through the dungeon just fine. And the healer? Joined my guild afterward. ;-) I don't take elitest bs too well. You want to be elitest, find some other block to darken.

I once healed a guy who was struggling against too many mobs he had pulled as I passed by on my templar. Instead of gratitude for the free service, he hurled a load of abuse at my templar. He then proceeded to follow me around Shadowfen abusing me. I never responded, stuck him on the ignore list and had a jolly good laugh at just how ungrateful some people are. He languishes there still, on the ignore list, having failed to get the response he wanted from me.

Trolling someone who just ignores the troll like they aren't even there quickly gets them bored. In these modern times, people are so quick to cry 'offence!' and get upset over the smallest things. Just ignore and move on. I think my ignore list has just 3 ppl on it.

i only harrass people that harass me first.
like crypax the little zergling

Spoilerd the quote so as not to spam but: @Riejael That was one of the most insightful and helpful posts I have ever read on this subject. I have seen all sorts of stuff in my time with online games. I am one of the people who can get sucked into a life story and want to help them in any way I can. I learned from this however. And your post made me realise things even more. Thank you

Whether one believes the "responsibility" is on the side of the harasser ("guilty") or the harassed ("victim"), I'd like to suggest that we can all do something about it : if we see people behaving like a**h*****, let's tell them. If people in our guilds behave like a**h*****, let's tell them. Let's kick them if we have the power. Let's set up guild rules that define what being "helpful" or "respectful" or "adult" really means, concretely.

There's too much laissez-faire, indifference and "none of my business" going on - falsely disguised as "being tolerant", "just relax" or "it's just a game".

One day i swear my ignore list hits the limit of people able to be ignored.

Tandor wrote: »

The problem with name changes is that they can work both ways. While someone who considers himself to be a victim can hide behind a new name, so can someone with a bad reputation.

This is true and those who wish to heavily harass other players will just create a separate account to do so without risking their primary account. It's especially easy on xbox since creating an alternate account is free. Best to accept the reality that not everyone is nice and mean people will always be so ignore and move on.

gbaker42 wrote: »

I am concerned with what im hearing in the community. I know of players getting relentlessly harassed in this game and even when reports are made not much seems to get done. People leave guilds to try and start over but that doesnt solve the problem. Now I hear ESO wont even allow a name change to get away from these toxic players.

WOW was worse, harassment wise, imo. But, then again, I have only made a few, even notable, friendships through ESO. And if someone is being ignorant, just ignore them and move on with your life.

pattyLtd wrote: »

Only once i've been in a situation where i felt very uncomfortable to the point that i ended up deciding not to play that part of the game for a while just to avoid this person. Block/ignore didn't help in the slightest.

My block/ignore list is empty and people that say theirs are full are most likely the ones that send stupid flame messages in pvp and then get mad for the response they get to it, however that's not harrassment not even close IMO.

So people that actually use the function the way its intended MUST be bringing it on themselves because your anecdotal experience was opposite of theirs?

vamp_emily wrote: »

I've been harassed a few times in PvP. The ignore feature works well. The only thing I don't like about it, is the bully will sit there and degrade you in zone chat after you have them on ignore. I once took a person off ignore just to hear them tell my alliance that I was worthless, and a few other bad things.

There are some mean people in PvP

You're the exact kind of person who encourages trolling. Stop worrying about what they say when you have them on ignore!

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