I'd like to preface this by saying I do not act on these feelings, and I do very strongly wish they either didn't exist or I didn't get put in the same place as people with conflicting ones.
I'm a tank main. When I tank dungeons I do it at a fair pace and try to include everyone. The only scenario I fake tank in is with a premade group of friends who are already okay with it.
However...
I can solo every normal dungeon. I can likely solo the vast majority of veteran vanilla dungeons. I only queue up to get transmutes and because every extra player queueing with me is an extra loot drop I can possibly leech off of.
In fact, I'll go as far as to say I actively do not like doing dungeons any more. I maybe even hate them. I have run Fungal Grotto 1 hundreds of times. Possibly over a thousand. The only reason I'm running it again is to farm new gear to use on a new class in content I'll actually enjoy.
So... yeah, as far as those feelings go I actively do not want a tank. I want another DPS. Heck, I'll throw the healer out and take two.
I promise I am not alone in these thoughts. That's exactly why we have a fake tank problem.
You want the fake tank problem to go away? Quit incentivizing players like me to go back to random dungeons. If we want to go we'll go. If we don't, then some of us are going to impact everyone else.
At risk of going a bit off topic, what do you run to be able to solo vet?