Favorite one-liners

Reistr_the_Unbroken

Tabbycat wrote: »

"You look like a sturdy one. Shall I treat you to my whip or my riding crop?"

Where is this quote from? I must find it

GimpyPorcupine

Reistr_the_Unbroken wrote: »

show previous quotes

Tabbycat wrote: »

"You look like a sturdy one. Shall I treat you to my whip or my riding crop?"

Where is this quote from? I must find it

Dark Seducers in Coldharbour delves. Grotto of Depravity, I think.

MasterSpatula

This one isn't actually a line of dialogue but is in a journal in Wrothgar:

"Tusk off or tusk you? Why choose?"

Sagz

Basically anything Velidreth says..... Especially, Come here sweet meat!

She has the best dungeon dialogue in the game imo

phairdon

"My pick, my pick, you broke my pick". When my char attacked a bandit trying to open a chest in The Rift. Never heard the line before.

mayasunrising

""You worthless rag!" ~Uldor at the finale of the Tears of the Two Moons quest.

And of course the Augur of the Obscure! I think he has some of the best dialogue in the game (though technically not one-liners):

• "Oh, you're going to love this one. I'm seeing a tiny island, surrounded by ... it's either water or cats. Difficult to say. Let's hope it's the cats, eh?"
• "You know, every stone tells a story. I mean that literally, by the way. That wall over there won't shut up about how much it hates rain."
• ""You know I can see time in all directions? I see you as you are now, as you were before you were born, and as you'll be after you're dead all at once! You're an adorable baby, mate. Less charming as a corpse."

Zepiroth

“stay awhile and listen“

Mr_Walker

Not technically one-liners, but Rilis at the end of BC1. He's so deliciously snarky.

qbit

I don't know about in game but one of my guild mates was hosting a world boss run in alikier and deeshan. Guy had a one liner prepared for every boss before the fight. Dude was hilarious. Like dad joke quality relevant to the boss before we burned it down.

FleetwoodSmack

I'm filled with sap and fury. ~ Heem-Jas

jainiadral

Cadwell: "Guard your pluckables. Eyes... spleen... anything pluckable, really."

Datthaw

Wrong hole foo

Vulsahdaal

A little lengthy, but it is all said as a one-liner:

"Thrice blasted son of a dreck-sifting root-munching bread-baking sot! May your ears be stuffed with whirlifly larvae, your bow-hand bitten by a rabid stoat..Moving on!"
~~ Genboril, Elden Root

bluebird

Nuzon, a Khajiit merchant in the Alinor plaza, to a High Elf player character:
"Oh, a High Elf. Sooo special. Think your dung doesn't stink, do you? Smells like rainbows and moon-sugar, yeees? WELL, A POX ON YOU! ... Now, what can this one help you with today?"

Cat's gotta work on his bootlicking a bit more and hide that attitude or he's getting his furry backside deported

TaliColdwater

"Does this look like a rash to you?"

bluebird

Kinlady Aldermil, random encounter in outdoor Summerset:
'Look at Paredan with his nose in that book when he has such fine company right here. I'll bet it's full of that nebarra smut they call romance.'

I feel so attacked right now *hides Kindle full of nebarra smut*

Aeslief

The Companions have some of the best dialogue. So many good lines to choose from, here's a few favorites:

"The Divines gave you a nose for a reason, Tharn. So you can keep your mouth shut and still keep breathing." - Lyris

"The next time you hide something from the most powerful necromancer in all of Tamriel, you might reconsider hiding it in a bloody tomb!" - Abnur

"I find it hilarious that Mannimarco chose such a massive projected appearance. He's obviously overcompensating for something." - Abnur

But one of my favorite stop and laugh out loud moments came courtesy of Darien Gautier:

"If I could get my hands on that damn lizard, I swear I'd make a pair of boots from his hide. And then I'd put them on and stomp through troll poop!" - Darien

Galen15

M'aiq the Liar: "M'aiq learned the Brothers of Strife are either volcanoes or Elves. If one of each, their mother could have some explaining."

Ecileh71

Paraphrasing, but I once heard Pacrooti say something like:

This one just learned an amazing thing! Pregnant dogs? Are full of puppies!

It made me laugh out loud, but I haven't heard him say it since.

Hurbster

Don't know the exact quote but Naryu does tell me to get off my arse and save the King in Fort Amol.

jainiadral

Roaming around Khenarthi's Roost, trying to gear up my Argonian the last time before 50, I ran into M'aiq: "Come no closer," said the ghost so M'aiq did not. But she kept saying it wherever he went.

Juju_beans

Two drunks talking in an Inn..I think it was Stros M'Kai

"In the morning I'll be sober but you'll still be stupid"

AlnilamE

eso_nya wrote: »

"This was your healers fault!"

The MC is one of the reasons why DSA will always be better than Maelstrom.

commodore64

"You look like you know your way around a riding beast"

Hey, that was never proven!

Devil_Keyz

Ahhhh I been waiting for a thread like this haha mine HAS to be From the nord vicecannon during one of the quests in Shadowfen “ we’ve got a mess on our hands, worse then when a dog eats cheesewheel! “ lmao and what’s worse is his smile after saying this lol

UntrustedExistenz

Juju_beans wrote: »

Two drunks talking in an Inn..I think it was Stros M'Kai

"In the morning I'll be sober but you'll still be stupid"

I heard that few days ago, later he answered "You'll not be sober tommorow" xD

Koensol

Aeslief wrote: »

The Companions have some of the best dialogue. So many good lines to choose from, here's a few favorites:

"The Divines gave you a nose for a reason, Tharn. So you can keep your mouth shut and still keep breathing." - Lyris

"Well played Titanborn... well played..." Abnur

doomette

AlnilamE wrote: »

show previous quotes

Loves_guars wrote: »

Molag at dolmens:" The skins of those you love will fly as my banners."

That is my favourite dolmen quote.


"Cry me a river. Maybe you'll float out of Craglorn."

I’m partial to the “Ten anchors dropped for each that is destroyed” or something like that. The delivery is so sassy I crack up every time.

SshadowSscale

I actually have two from the main quests
1 Abnur Tharn
"Maybe next time you hide something from the most powerful necromancer in the world, don't do it in a graveyard."
And
2 Abnur Tharn
"As hard as it may be for you Lyris don't be an idiot."

r34lian

Beast master in blessed crusidble " and there we have it the winners of the grand meleee" and also random nords " did you drink my drink"