Is it wrong to be a little pissed about this?

exeeter702 · August 2016

So i am not sure if this is even report worthy but id like to share a recent experience i had the other day when trying to get my gold pledge out of the way before work.

Standard fare at first - guy posts what he is looking for in zone chat, i whisper him, letting him know that i would like to go as dps. He invites and we are only in need of a healer. After a few minutes, a healer is invited and we proceed. I take a quick look at our group to see what i can switch around skill wise, and to see what class is healing to make other adjusts etc etc no biggy. but i notice that we are all sitting around 400 cp, however the healer is only cp20. I politely ask (yes believe it or not, i really am not a *** on the internet for the most part) that we use the group finder tool, as with a 4 man pre-made the queues are instant and it will be much smoother for us with the healer getting a battle level boost.

Early on i noticed the response of the party lead was a bit snappy but i did not really pay it any mind. He simply said "who cares, port into the *** dungeon". I made one more comment prior to going in that i truly think it would have been better via the GF (yes as a pre-made the tool actually does work). He became irate and i left it alone. Since in a magNB and i actually like to heal whenever possible, i figured i can cushion the group a bit with sap essence, funnel health and refreshing path for trash pulls, and for boss fights funnel health hots should help out. Of course i kept all this to myself.

Fast forward to the dungeon, as i expected, the healer was struggling just a bit, a few deaths on some trash pulls but nothing serious, myself and the other dps were well off and we got through to the end of the dungeon with little hassle. However right around the point which we get near the last boss.... well, if you dont mind, just take a look at the convo, edited for privacy and forum rules of course.

That exchange occurred moments before the last boss, when i expressed concerns that we would have issues with the gold objective. Then right as we enter the room and trigger the boss is when i was removed.

Honestly i wasnt even that mad really. The reality is that im still under the impression that a large majority of players still dont really understand the battle leveling system and how its achieved. I think zos could maybe do a better job informing new players, in game, of the system.

And just a side note, minutes after that debacle, i saw the same player in zone chat typing "LG Healer for GOLD" So i really dont know what transpired after i was kicked. Remember i was not the healer in that group.

Sallington · August 2016

#puglyfe

dsalter · August 2016

one of the rules you should obey in pugs is never speak back, vote kicks get abused and some people say yes to votes cause why not, it doesnt affect them.

if you wanna deal with these "special" individuals you vote kick them while they are unaware.

wayfarerx · August 2016

Guy was an a**, but not worth getting pissed off over. Put him on ignore and move on, there are plenty of nice people to play with out there.

Smasherx74 · August 2016

OP that was me. tl;dr but this is l2p issue.

Miszou · August 2016

Smasherx74 wrote: »

OP that was me. tl;dr but this is l2p issue.

Beardimus · August 2016

To be honest this backs up my view of text chat. Verbally the misunderstanding wouldn't have happened. Written word can be interpreted
I see what you are saying for sure, but we don't know what was in this guys head. I read it you are on her side and want to help, he may not have understood your scaling idea dn thought you were being elitist cos she was Cp20 hence get narky at you. Etc etc. Verbally things like this are easier to fix. Just my 2p

exeeter702 · August 2016

Beardimus wrote: »

To be honest this backs up my view of text chat. Verbally the misunderstanding wouldn't have happened. Written word can be interpreted
I see what you are saying for sure, but we don't know what was in this guys head. I read it you are on her side and want to help, he may not have understood your scaling idea dn thought you were being elitist cos she was Cp20 hence get narky at you. Etc etc. Verbally things like this are easier to fix. Just my 2p

yes i do agree with you on that front.

Luigi_Vampa · August 2016

What dungeon was it?

e1team · August 2016

Why would it even concern you? Some people just play for fun. I was in a group the other day where I was a healer. And I'm not even a dedicated one. We literally died, whole group, 3-5 times each boss. And yet we went on. And in good spirits. Wen the lowes CP NB said she'll leave so we could find a better substitute, I asked she'd stay. And she did, and we got the final boss together. One of the best dungeons I ran in a long time!

phreatophile · August 2016

exeeter702 wrote: »

Early on i noticed the response of the party lead was a bit snappy but i did not really pay it any mind. He simply said "who cares, port into the *** dungeon".

This is where the spidey senses start to twitch.

I made one more comment prior to going in that i truly think it would have been better via the GF (yes as a pre-made the tool actually does work). He became irate and i left it alone.

For me, this is when the jerk-dar goes into the red. My time is precious, I'll spend it in ways that make me happy. I'll take all the time I have with somebody who tries and had a good attitude. Somebody that has a hissy fit over and refuses to take really obvious time saving advice isn't worth it.

So not wrong. Guy probably didn't even really understand why you made the suggestion you did. It got turned around to where it looked like you were attacking the healer when you were actually trying to help.

exeeter702 · August 2016

e1team wrote: »

Why would it even concern you? Some people just play for fun. I was in a group the other day where I was a healer. And I'm not even a dedicated one. We literally died, whole group, 3-5 times each boss. And yet we went on. And in good spirits. Wen the lowes CP NB said she'll leave so we could find a better substitute, I asked she'd stay. And she did, and we got the final boss together. One of the best dungeons I ran in a long time!

Initially my concern was simply that we would have issues getting through it at all. Once we were inside and handling everything it became a non issue. I simply made a final mention near the end. The healer in question seemed to be concerned that her gear was just really inadequate and i was telling her that it was mores so due to the instance being the lvl that it was. I have no problem wiping and playing with all ranges of player levels.

Dromede · August 2016

Yeah, there's a lot of players who don't understand battle levelling, both new players and old ones who just never bothered to keep up with the updates.

I had a similar case, only i was the one insisting on battle levelling as an underlevel tank (v1 in v16 dungeon back before cp was shared). I was ignored, and we proceeded to vBC with me wiping on the first boss. Healer kept asking "why so squishy" in the chat, and i just quit the group. I'm all for being patient and i'm ready for compromise/mutual education, but i will not take cr*p for someone else's mistake and ignorance.

fastolfv_ESO · August 2016

pretty sure most people dont have the time to spend 2 hours in a dungeon, we all got things to do and limited time. A pledge should take 20 mins, theres nothing wrong with pointing out the issues you see b4 the run starts not suffer through people who refuse to listen and plain do not understand the game

Soriana · August 2016

All depends on your perspective, honestly. Sounds like the lead was touchy, maybe friends with the healer, and thought you were attacking. Or maybe the lead is just a huge cannoli that gets upset whenever anyone 'questions' their judgment, whether intended or not.

I have rage quit two dungeons in 2 1/2 years because of leaders like that one. I haven't ever been kicked so can't speak to how I would feel but, my two cents follows:

Let it go. There are far too many good, fun, happy people in this game to let a few bad apples ruin your experience.

spectre303 · August 2016

i get cranky when people try to micromanage a simple dungeon run too. Its not rocket science, a CP 10 should be fine in most of the old dungeons if they have a half decent build.

Not saying you were in the wrong OP, that guy didnt need to be a prick, but at some point its best to just shut up and let people play the way they are going to play.

AfkNinja · August 2016

spectre303 wrote: »

i get cranky when people try to micromanage a simple dungeon run too. Its not rocket science, a CP 10 should be fine in most of the old dungeons if they have a half decent build.

Not saying you were in the wrong OP, that guy didn't need to be a prick, but at some point its best to just shut up and let people play the way they are going to play.

NO, he saw a potential problem and wanted to address it before the dungeon began in a polite manner. They absolutely should have queued through the DF to get battle leveling for the healer, it's completely moronic not to. CP 400's should have already realized there would be an issue imo.

Why is it so hard to just talk to your group before the event to avoid potential issues?

AfkNinja · August 2016

Smasherx74 wrote: »

OP that was me. tl;dr but this is l2p issue.

Yea, you need to learn a CP 10 healer going up against CP 160 enemies/dungeons is going to cause your group issues. Use the battle leveling, it's there for a reason.

spectre303 · August 2016

AfkNinja wrote: »

spectre303 wrote: »

i get cranky when people try to micromanage a simple dungeon run too. Its not rocket science, a CP 10 should be fine in most of the old dungeons if they have a half decent build.

Not saying you were in the wrong OP, that guy didn't need to be a prick, but at some point its best to just shut up and let people play the way they are going to play.

NO, he saw a potential problem and wanted to address it before the dungeon began in a polite manner. They absolutely should have queued through the DF to get battle leveling for the healer, it's completely moronic not to. CP 400's should have already realized there would be an issue imo.

Why is it so hard to just talk to your group before the event to avoid potential issues?

yea and then his polite suggestion was met with push back and attitude, at which point you might as well just shut up and let them do what they want or leave.

AfkNinja · August 2016

spectre303 wrote: »

AfkNinja wrote: »

spectre303 wrote: »

i get cranky when people try to micromanage a simple dungeon run too. Its not rocket science, a CP 10 should be fine in most of the old dungeons if they have a half decent build.

Not saying you were in the wrong OP, that guy didn't need to be a prick, but at some point its best to just shut up and let people play the way they are going to play.

NO, he saw a potential problem and wanted to address it before the dungeon began in a polite manner. They absolutely should have queued through the DF to get battle leveling for the healer, it's completely moronic not to. CP 400's should have already realized there would be an issue imo.

Why is it so hard to just talk to your group before the event to avoid potential issues?

yea and then his polite suggestion was met with push back and attitude, at which point you might as well just shut up and let them do what they want or leave.

So instead of doing things correctly we should just ignore problems and let the group fail? Interesting theory.

SolarCat02 · August 2016

It's not worth getting worked up about. Let it go. Some people aren't interested in trying to understand what anyone else says. I am also glad you told the healer that she was fine, just under leveled. I am hoping she understood, it's tough being a healer sometimes, especially if the levels are stacked against you.

I have run plenty of dungeons where one person was underleveled. Heck, we loved running Vaults of Madness scaled to vr8 with the tank at vr1 and me as healer around vr3 back in the day. Fooling around like that has made me a better player.

Everyone in the group always had a discussion first, though, about whether or not to use group finder, and we always made sure everyone understood both options and wanted to do things without the battle leveling before we proceeded.

spectre303 · August 2016

AfkNinja wrote: »

spectre303 wrote: »

AfkNinja wrote: »

spectre303 wrote: »

i get cranky when people try to micromanage a simple dungeon run too. Its not rocket science, a CP 10 should be fine in most of the old dungeons if they have a half decent build.

Not saying you were in the wrong OP, that guy didn't need to be a prick, but at some point its best to just shut up and let people play the way they are going to play.

NO, he saw a potential problem and wanted to address it before the dungeon began in a polite manner. They absolutely should have queued through the DF to get battle leveling for the healer, it's completely moronic not to. CP 400's should have already realized there would be an issue imo.

Why is it so hard to just talk to your group before the event to avoid potential issues?

yea and then his polite suggestion was met with push back and attitude, at which point you might as well just shut up and let them do what they want or leave.

So instead of doing things correctly we should just ignore problems and let the group fail? Interesting theory.

Wow you need some reading comprehension help. IF theyre not listening to you and its getting negative then shut up and let the group leader lead his group his way or leave. This whole arguing with stupid to get your way BS doesnt get you anywhere.

AfkNinja · August 2016

spectre303 wrote: »

AfkNinja wrote: »

spectre303 wrote: »

AfkNinja wrote: »

spectre303 wrote: »

i get cranky when people try to micromanage a simple dungeon run too. Its not rocket science, a CP 10 should be fine in most of the old dungeons if they have a half decent build.

Not saying you were in the wrong OP, that guy didn't need to be a prick, but at some point its best to just shut up and let people play the way they are going to play.

NO, he saw a potential problem and wanted to address it before the dungeon began in a polite manner. They absolutely should have queued through the DF to get battle leveling for the healer, it's completely moronic not to. CP 400's should have already realized there would be an issue imo.

Why is it so hard to just talk to your group before the event to avoid potential issues?

yea and then his polite suggestion was met with push back and attitude, at which point you might as well just shut up and let them do what they want or leave.

So instead of doing things correctly we should just ignore problems and let the group fail? Interesting theory.

Wow you need some reading comprehension help. IF theyre not listening to you and its getting negative then shut up and let the group leader lead his group his way or leave. This whole arguing with stupid to get your way BS doesnt get you anywhere.

I don't need some reading comprehension I just fundamentally disagree with your point. No need to get aggressive.

I don't subscribe to that line of thinking that when things get difficult you just give up. The guy was pushing back cause he likely didn't understand what was being requested. Battle leveling the healer is a good idea, unless the group decides as a whole that the challenge is wanted. When a group member gets testy it's easy to take a step back and explain it just takes a moment. It's much easier with a headset, text is very easy to misinterpret.

He was trying to help his group, in no way shape or form was he in the wrong. Every person in that group is giving their time, they deserve to have a fun experience and battle leveling would have made that easier and likely more fun. Just because someone started a group doesn't give them the right to be abrasive and ignore their members who are just trying to help.

You have every right to leave, but I wouldn't. I would have done what the OP did and tried to explain why it was a good idea to get the battle leveling so the healer isn't being 1 shot right and left.

spectre303 · August 2016

AfkNinja wrote: »

spectre303 wrote: »

AfkNinja wrote: »

spectre303 wrote: »

AfkNinja wrote: »

spectre303 wrote: »

i get cranky when people try to micromanage a simple dungeon run too. Its not rocket science, a CP 10 should be fine in most of the old dungeons if they have a half decent build.

Not saying you were in the wrong OP, that guy didn't need to be a prick, but at some point its best to just shut up and let people play the way they are going to play.

NO, he saw a potential problem and wanted to address it before the dungeon began in a polite manner. They absolutely should have queued through the DF to get battle leveling for the healer, it's completely moronic not to. CP 400's should have already realized there would be an issue imo.

Why is it so hard to just talk to your group before the event to avoid potential issues?

yea and then his polite suggestion was met with push back and attitude, at which point you might as well just shut up and let them do what they want or leave.

So instead of doing things correctly we should just ignore problems and let the group fail? Interesting theory.

Wow you need some reading comprehension help. IF theyre not listening to you and its getting negative then shut up and let the group leader lead his group his way or leave. This whole arguing with stupid to get your way BS doesnt get you anywhere.

I don't need some reading comprehension I just fundamentally disagree with your point. No need to get aggressive.

I don't subscribe to that line of thinking that when things get difficult you just give up. The guy was pushing back cause he likely didn't understand what was being requested. Battle leveling the healer is a good idea, unless the group decides as a whole that the challenge is wanted. When a group member gets testy it's easy to take a step back and explain it just takes a moment. It's much easier with a headset, text is very easy to misinterpret.

He was trying to help his group, in no way shape or form was he in the wrong. Every person in that group is giving their time, they deserve to have a fun experience and battle leveling would have made that easier and likely more fun. Just because someone started a group doesn't give them the right to be abrasive and ignore their members who are just trying to help.

You have every right to leave, but I wouldn't. I would have done what the OP did and tried to explain why it was a good idea to get the battle leveling so the healer isn't being 1 shot right and left.

I know he wasnt in the wrong, thats why i said exactly that. You're still missing my point entirely and arguing what SHOULD happen, and i agree most of that SHOULD happen. groups should communicate and decide things together, not waste their time etc... Seriously did you even read any of my posts?

What im saying is.. when that DOESN'T happen. when your group is led by an insufferable ass who fails to comprehend the things you try to tell him, then your best bet is to A. leave. or B. shut up and let them lead their group and hope for the best. Arguing with someone who fails to listen or understand you is pointless. It will end up with them kicking you from the group, which is exactly what occurred in this case.

On that note having now made the same point 4 times... if you still fail to comprehend what im saying then good luck arguing about what should happen in a perfect world with someone else.

AfkNinja · August 2016

spectre303 wrote: »

I know he wasnt in the wrong, thats why i said exactly that. You're still missing my point entirely and arguing what SHOULD happen, and i agree most of that SHOULD happen. groups should communicate and decide things together, not waste their time etc... Seriously did you even read any of my posts?

What im saying is.. when that DOESN'T happen. when your group is led by an insufferable ass who fails to comprehend the things you try to tell him, then your best bet is to A. leave. or B. shut up and let them lead their group and hope for the best. Arguing with someone who fails to listen or understand you is pointless. It will end up with them kicking you from the group, which is exactly what occurred in this case.

On that note having now made the same point 4 times... if you still fail to comprehend what im saying then good luck arguing about what should happen in a perfect world with someone else.

As I stated, I read all of your points. You are stating after he misunderstands and pushes back you should give up the point and get the group over with or leave. You are advocating giving up the point because the leader is being a dense bully.

I am simply stating I disagree, I would keep attempting to explain why it's a good idea in a polite way. I just don't believe in letting a rude person override something that is beneficial to the group because he's being abrasive.

Are you sure you read my responses? Because I did specify that was the point I was disagreeing with. My apologies if you felt I was calling you out or something I didn't mean to derail this discussion, I'm just stating I don't subscribe to the idea of giving up on something that I KNOW is beneficial to the group.

spectre303 · August 2016

I am simply stating I disagree, I would keep attempting to explain why it's a good idea in a polite way. I just don't believe in letting a rude person override something that is beneficial to the group because he's being abrasive.

Thats pretty much what the OP did, and because of it he got kicked right before the last boss. In a perfect world that should work, but some people dont give a damn about the right way or common sense.

I agree you should try and educate them and be helpful and "do it right" rather than give up. But thats not always a choice you get to make and sometimes its best to just shut up and go with the flow.

No hard feeling its the internet.

just felt stuck on loop for a bit there.

Armitas · August 2016

I think you did the right thing OP. If I was the leader I would prefer not to live in ignorance, and you did it in a polite and respectful way. If nothing else do it for the people that group up for the next gold pledge.

AfkNinja · August 2016

spectre303 wrote: »

I am simply stating I disagree, I would keep attempting to explain why it's a good idea in a polite way. I just don't believe in letting a rude person override something that is beneficial to the group because he's being abrasive.

Thats pretty much what the OP did, and because of it he got kicked right before the last boss. In a perfect world that should work, but some people dont give a damn about the right way or common sense.

I agree you should try and educate them and be helpful and "do it right" rather than give up. But thats not always a choice you get to make and sometimes its best to just shut up and go with the flow.

No hard feeling its the internet. just felt stuck on loop for a bit there.

Yup yup, I understand where you're comin from.

From time to time I do get kicked but that's life. If I even convince one person I think it's worth it cause in the future they can avoid those issues with other groups. I don't get mad about it though cause like you said some people just don't WANT to do things the easy or correct way.

visionality · August 2016

spectre303 wrote: »

i get cranky when people try to micromanage a simple dungeon run too. Its not rocket science, a CP 10 should be fine in most of the old dungeons if they have a half decent build.

Not saying you were in the wrong OP, that guy didnt need to be a prick, but at some point its best to just shut up and let people play the way they are going to play.

Nice point to prove how many people don't understanding the upscaling.

Of course a CP10 will NOT be fine in most of the old dungeons when running them on a cp 160 level, no matter how "half decent" his build. With CP10 he's on his first vet character and in his first vet dungeons. He's just learning vet dungeon mechanics and just starting to farm his first monster sets and decent gear, all on V1 level. Without upscaling, he doesn't get any health/stam/magica buff, no added resistance, no increased weapon and spell damage etc. So he's essentially having half of the stats of the rest of the group and ZERO cp buffs at all.

Iselin · August 2016

His initial response to a very reasonable suggestion to battle level the lowbee tells me everything I'd need to know about this not being someone I want to group with. I don't waste time with unreasonable jerks.

failkiwib16_ESO · August 2016

Eh people are unreasonable and stupid in so many ways.

I got into a cp400+ group, and wrote in the group chat that I was going to pick up the pledges + needed time to change skills and slot healing related skills.
- leader uses grouping tool, pulls me into the dungeon without giving me time to pick up pledge - DD's aggro the mobs at the start like a maniac, so I couldn't change any skills either. At this point I wrote in the groupchat that since they pulled me in like this, and didn't even wait for me to change skills, then they would have to deal with me only using healing springs & breath of life...

1min later in the dungeon DD asks for repentance, then proceeds to say that if I don't give him repentance, he will run out of stamina and then he can't deal any damage at all blablah..... so I say wait, let me change skills - f*cker proceeds to aggro and pull mobs.

TL:DR - people suffer from severe brainlag and know-it-all attitude.