Wayrest Misogynists

mortemize · September 2015

So I ran into a group last night that was harassing some woman merely for trying to sell something to another player. She got called every derogatory name that exists for women. I found it all to be quite despicable.

About 20 people were there and not one person said anything, but then again if you do say anything you get doxxed, right? Because cowardice.

Misogynists have no place anywhere, let alone in the gaming community. Period.

Molag_Crow · September 2015

I can imagine how frustrating it would be to hear that, but don't let it get to you because in the end, it is them who have the most issues on a deep, personal level and they're only hurting themselves.

SantieClaws · September 2015

Was this on PC, Xbox or PS4?

Did you send in a report as it was happening.

I fear it is possibly a hazard of voice chat that people think they can do this sort of thing and get away with it. Someone should be looking out for this sort of thing. I don't know if anyone actively is.

Thymos · September 2015

mortemize wrote: »

So I ran into a group last night that was harassing some woman merely for trying to sell something to another player. She got called every derogatory name that exists for women. I found it all to be quite despicable.

About 20 people were there and not one person said anything, but then again if you do say anything you get doxxed, right? Because cowardice.

Misogynists have no place anywhere, let alone in the gaming community. Period.

Well, did you step in?

UrQuan · September 2015

This was on console, wasn't it? Did you report each and every one of them?

capnbinky · September 2015

We are going to need to start recording all of our sessions and sending the evidence straight to ZOS.

AhPook_Is_Here · September 2015

mortemize wrote: »

So I ran into a group last night that was harassing some woman merely for trying to sell something to another player. She got called every derogatory name that exists for women. I found it all to be quite despicable.

About 20 people were there and not one person said anything, but then again if you do say anything you get doxxed, right? Because cowardice.

Misogynists have no place anywhere, let alone in the gaming community. Period.

Personally I would have just gone for it. No need to be afraid of being e-shunned, it's just a video game. If you can't have a militant feminine diatribe in an anynomous video game world where else can you, "Democracy Now!"? Don't be that person who doesn't speak due to fear, speak up for what you believe in, but don't use bad words or you might get banned.

Tan9oSuccka · September 2015

Unfortunately, this kind of behavior is too common.

I start my own party (even if by myself) to avoid jerks, pan handlers (begging for gold or resources) and amateur rappers.

KerinKor · September 2015

mortemize wrote: »

but then again if you do say anything you get doxxed, right? Because cowardice..

LOL, "doxxed"!

Melodramatic much? Are you sure you know what that means?

Likely not but it's just an excuse for your doing nothing either.

jackiemanuel · September 2015

It hasn't been all that common but I've heard plenty of misogynistic and racist language in zone chat, particularly in the early level cities(Davon's Watch). Every time I've said something about it i'm shouted down with homosexual epithets and threats of violence.

willymchilybily · September 2015

wenxue2222b16_ESO wrote: »

Was this on PC, Xbox or PS4?

Did you send in a report as it was happening.

I fear it is possibly a hazard of voice chat that people think they can do this sort of thing and get away with it. Someone should be looking out for this sort of thing. I don't know if anyone actively is.

They can get away with it

How many times do you see every online game has a disclaimer that the "PEGI 16 rating" of the game does not apply to "online communication" which is un-moderated, and that's from the official Pan European Game Information governing body. (perhaps a different warning in america)

Effectively its an "I wash my hands of any responsibility" if you chose to communicate with others on that online game. and the only requirements in place is that users can block other users and report them. If you are interested below is quite a good pdf article from the UK on a broad spectrum of Gamin related topics. bottom of page 3 mentions "social interation"

www.parliament.uk/briefing-papers/post-pn-405.pdf

Recremen · September 2015

That's disgusting, nobody should have to go through that. Was it over voice chat, or text? If it's text then I hope someone screenshotted it so they can be reported for harassment. If it wasn't text, I don't know what kind of recourse is available. :-(

THEDKEXPERIENCE · September 2015

Wait ... I just came from another thread where I was told that only PVPers act dispicably.

On a side note just do what I do ... Ether tell them to stop being d bags (probably won't work) or yell in voice chat that you're giving away free grand soul gems right by the transitus shrine (this always works). Once the 4 or 5 d bags hear this they always stop what they are doing and run over. Now that you have their attention drawn away from the person being harrassed, just port away leaving them empty handed with nothing except hurt feelings.

mortemize · September 2015

I appreciate the feedback. I'll just answer everything I can in one post rather than individually.

No, I didn't do sh*t. I'm no better than any of the others that didn't do sh*t.

It was on Xbox One.

By the time I realized that I should record a clip, too much time had already passed.

I didn't check their names (too dumbfounded by the situation I guess) and I don't know how to report someone. I will have to figure that one out apparently...

Melodramatic? Not quite sure how to respond to you. Anyway, I know enough about it to have a legitimate concern with it. You shouldn't assume things.

Thymos · September 2015

mortemize wrote: »

No, I didn't do sh*t. I'm no better than any of the others that didn't do sh*t.

Classic case of the pot calling the kettle black, then.

Not sure what you're doing here complaining about it.

mortemize · September 2015

Thymos wrote: »

mortemize wrote: »

No, I didn't do sh*t. I'm no better than any of the others that didn't do sh*t.

Not sure what you're doing here complaining about it.

Yeah, I'm starting to feel the same way. It is futile after all, right?

mortemize · September 2015

Thymos wrote: »

mortemize wrote: »

No, I didn't do sh*t. I'm no better than any of the others that didn't do sh*t.

Classic case of the pot calling the kettle black, then.

Also, this would be correct if I didn't just admit to being no better than the others. Yeah...

RizaHawkeye · September 2015

Eggghh. I wish I could say this is the first time I've heard of this kind of comment. I've seen similar things - just recently in a dungeon in fact - and I get around it by playing with people who accept and respect the fact that I'm female.

As to people not doing anything, there may be several explanations. When I see that kind of conduct, I just report it with a screenshot. I don't get involved because that feeds the trolls. Anyone who would act that way on a public game is probably just trying to look cool to the group or otherwise seeking attention. Calling them out only gives them what they want.

Nestor · September 2015

It all starts somewhere. If you come across this behavior, tell them to grow up and quit being afraid of women. You certainly won't convince all of them to stop, but you might convince a few. These people might go on to try and curb this when they see it happening, or at least not pile on when a few start doing it. But even an attempt at reducing it is better than just ignoring it.

Will you get some backlash? Sure, but take solace in the fact that they are lashing out to protect their infantile behavior. Which kind of makes any backlash more pointless. Or, another way to look at it, your being the tank for the group and drawing aggro on yourself in order for others to get on with the job they need to do. Take pride in being the Tank here.

likelolwhat · September 2015

It's okay, OP. We've all been in that kind of situation: as the bystander, dumbfounded and in shock that anyone could act in such a despicable manner. Don't believe @Thymos; he is no better than the misogynists IMO for rubbing it in.

Yes, you didn't do anything. Yes, you should have recorded and reported it. Shoulda, woulda, coulda. You know better now, and it's good that you cared enough to come to the forums.

Now you know. People can be jerks (*cough*) and you should ALWAYS be ready to report someone if they are harassing someone.

So armed.

ZioGio · September 2015

Thymos wrote: »

mortemize wrote: »

No, I didn't do sh*t. I'm no better than any of the others that didn't do sh*t.

Classic case of the pot calling the kettle black, then.

Not sure what you're doing here complaining about it.

I'm sorry, but that's a pretty lame response. Maybe the OP is trying to give everyone a heads-up that this type of behavior is going on and so others won't be dumbfounded into inaction and might actually record the abuse. Using the pot/kettle idiom against the OP, who already admitted their inability to act, means you missed the point of the thread.

Troneon · September 2015

Record and report every time you see this crap. Then name and shame on unofficial forums / reddit.

Thymos · September 2015

ZioGio wrote: »

Thymos wrote: »

mortemize wrote: »

No, I didn't do sh*t. I'm no better than any of the others that didn't do sh*t.

Classic case of the pot calling the kettle black, then.

Not sure what you're doing here complaining about it.

I'm sorry, but that's a pretty lame response. Maybe the OP is trying to give everyone a heads-up that this type of behavior is going on and so others won't be dumbfounded into inaction and might actually record the abuse. Using the pot/kettle idiom against the OP, who already admitted their inability to act, means you missed the point of the thread.

I'm sorry, but I really don't have time to comfort people that don't act. I do act. I have reported people for harassing others. I am not someone that just sits on the sidelines and just has good intentions. After dropping my daughter off at school, I offered to help someone changing their tire on the side of the road. To me, inaction is just as bad as doing the bad deed. I'm sure not everyone will agree, but sitting on the sidelines then coming here complaining about the presence of such behavior does NO ONE any good, especially the person being harassed.

capnbinky · September 2015

For what it's worth, I appreciate you posting. Documenting these cases makes it easier for ZOS when/if they get around to properly cracking down on this behavior. You didn't do nothing; you told us.

I understand why you didn't say anything, and so does anyone who has been in that situation. It's like jumping out of stealth to defend an ally when they are being trampled by a zerg. Only it's emotional cost instead of horse simulator. Plus, you feel uncomfortable in the game afterwards, like they may remember and target you again.

willymchilybily · September 2015

mortemize wrote: »

By the time I realized that I should record a clip, too much time had already passed.

PS4 has 14 minutes of gameplay recorded whats it like on xbox1?

RizaHawkeye wrote: »

As to people not doing anything, there may be several explanations.

mute area chat the instant i enter a town. or just remove ear piece.

mortemize wrote: »

No, I didn't do sh*t. I'm no better than any of the others that didn't do sh*t.

only true if next time something similar happens you also don't do sh*t, otherwise you are better for having learnt from this experience. The problem is anonymity /group mentality .....able to act/say/do what you want without fear of reprisal, thinking it doesn't matter because its not RL. Most grow out of it with experience/age

or play call of duty

Psychobunni · September 2015

You can report it, if not you are part of the problem.

Maybe file with the BBB? In regards to lack of action, enforcement of the TOS, and allowance of such an environment to occur?

Take to social media with some recordings, contact gaming news sites with them and get them to write stories?

Or just sit back and be part of the problem

Igawotch · September 2015

Edit never mind

UrQuan · September 2015

Thymos wrote: »

mortemize wrote: »

No, I didn't do sh*t. I'm no better than any of the others that didn't do sh*t.

Classic case of the pot calling the kettle black, then.

You clearly don't understand what that expression means. It's used when someone criticizes someone else for something they do, while pretending that they are superior. It doesn't work when someone is lumping themselves in with the people that they are criticizing, and is obviously criticizing themselves for not acting differently. OP was shocked by what was going on, didn't know how to respond, in the moment took the cowards way out, and now feels terrible about it. Instead of jumping on him for not doing the right thing on the spot, maybe try to actually make a difference by providing advice on methods to actually deal with such situations effectively in the future. It's easier to criticize than be part of the solution, though.

And saying "you should have stepped in" isn't helping anything. Advice like that provided in this thread by @danielpatrickkeaneub17_ESO @Nestor and @Troneon (probably missed one or two giving solid advice too) is helpful. Your posts just make the problem worse by encouraging people not to come and post about this kind of situation unless they actually knew how to deal with it.

Kalfis · September 2015

12 year olds will be 12 year olds, especially 12 year olds with mics.

Rikal · September 2015

Thymos wrote: »

ZioGio wrote: »

Thymos wrote: »

mortemize wrote: »

No, I didn't do sh*t. I'm no better than any of the others that didn't do sh*t.

Classic case of the pot calling the kettle black, then.

Not sure what you're doing here complaining about it.

I'm sorry, but that's a pretty lame response. Maybe the OP is trying to give everyone a heads-up that this type of behavior is going on and so others won't be dumbfounded into inaction and might actually record the abuse. Using the pot/kettle idiom against the OP, who already admitted their inability to act, means you missed the point of the thread.

I'm sorry, but I really don't have time to comfort people that don't act. I do act. I have reported people for harassing others. I am not someone that just sits on the sidelines and just has good intentions. After dropping my daughter off at school, I offered to help someone changing their tire on the side of the road. To me, inaction is just as bad as doing the bad deed. I'm sure not everyone will agree, but sitting on the sidelines then coming here complaining about the presence of such behavior does NO ONE any good, especially the person being harassed.

@Thymos For someone who sounds like they try to be a "good samaritan" most of the time, you're not actually helping anyone here. Try encouraging OP to do something positive next time.

UrQuan · September 2015

Rikal wrote: »

Thymos wrote: »

ZioGio wrote: »

Thymos wrote: »

mortemize wrote: »

No, I didn't do sh*t. I'm no better than any of the others that didn't do sh*t.

Classic case of the pot calling the kettle black, then.

Not sure what you're doing here complaining about it.

I'm sorry, but that's a pretty lame response. Maybe the OP is trying to give everyone a heads-up that this type of behavior is going on and so others won't be dumbfounded into inaction and might actually record the abuse. Using the pot/kettle idiom against the OP, who already admitted their inability to act, means you missed the point of the thread.

I'm sorry, but I really don't have time to comfort people that don't act. I do act. I have reported people for harassing others. I am not someone that just sits on the sidelines and just has good intentions. After dropping my daughter off at school, I offered to help someone changing their tire on the side of the road. To me, inaction is just as bad as doing the bad deed. I'm sure not everyone will agree, but sitting on the sidelines then coming here complaining about the presence of such behavior does NO ONE any good, especially the person being harassed.

@Thymos For someone who sounds like they try to be a "good samaritan" most of the time, you're not actually helping anyone here. Try encouraging OP to do something positive next time.

In fact, he's actively contributing to the problem by suggesting that people shouldn't come to discuss such situations here unless they did something to stop the harassment.