CYRODIIL ETIQUETTE

DaisyRay

I was minding my own business today, sneaking around in Cyro to be a little spai and heal random faction members on the way. During my adventure, however, I came across a most repulsive creature. It was none other than the deadly Nightblade! I initially attempted to avoid the creature, fearing that I would be devoured and forced to return to the keep where I had begun. The creature was having none of it and started attacking me, nearly devouring me in its first bite. Fortunately, I had been in a similar situation before and immediately raised my shields and began to heal. Despite the numerous protection spells I cast on myself and the ground, the creature persisted.

At one point, I thought the battle was over when the creature vanished. It reappeared just as I was about to relax, nearly destroying me in the process. However, I narrowly avoided death and was able to heal myself. I'm guessing the fight went on like this for about five minutes. I thought it would never end, but thankfully, a good Samaritan saw us and came to my aid in defending me from the creature. We eventually defeated the creature together, and I was able to continue my mission.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

[Skip Here For Question]

<.< So sorry for the theatrics. Now that you know what happened, this is where my real question is. So, after the NB died, I was extremely proud of myself for not dying and performed a dance on the NB's corpse. I've been making my healer tankier for MYM and experimenting with different skills. I honestly didn't think it was a bad idea because I do it as a healer whenever I survive an attack. Not long after, the person whispered to me that I shouldn't gloat if someone else got the kill for me. I explained that I was not gloating and apologized if I came across as rude. I told him I was just relieved I was alive and that he couldn't kill me.

He went on to say that I couldn't kill him either. I explained it wasn't the same because I was a healer and he was a NB. Anyway, long story short, I kept apologizing, attempting to clarify that I wasn't being intentionally rude or gloating. I was just pleased with myself. He eventually let it go, but I don't think he understood.

I am curious if you think I was in the wrong or was he just exaggerating? I'm asking because I've done it before and if it really is bad to do then I'll stop. I don't want to do anything that offends people. Is this similar to tbags?

jaws343

If you didn't get the kill, definitely don't dance over the corpse unless you want to be seen as gloating for something you didn't do.

No better than when a group of 10 will chase one guy and then teabag them after they kill them. Like good job, you 10v1'd someone.

jaws343

To follow up on my own comment.

Even if you 1v1 someone, and it lasts 5 minutes, and finally one of you gets the kill. Just don't gloat. You had a good fight. One of you won. No need to be a poor sport over it.

I once had a 10 minute slugfest with a necro. It was wild. Their healing and damage mitigation was insane, and I had to line up one of the most perfect burst combos I have ever performed to take them down finally. Somehow no other player showed up. They died. And we both went on our way. No need to dance over them, no need to message them and rub it in. We had a good fight, we moved on.

DaisyRay

Alright, fair enough. I won't do it anymore. Thank you for the feedback!

FluffyReachWitch

Maybe you didn't get the kill, but you get to be proud of yourself for surviving the gank attempts and keeping them on their toes until help arrived. In fact, I think you earned your dance.

All sorts of heated things get said in PvP whether they're deserved or not, and more likely than not the Nightblade was frustrated after their ambush backfired. But emoting over a body after a stressful battle is common and usually harmless, and most people will just respawn to get back in the game instead of waiting around to let people /dance or /shovel or /sweep next to them.

EdmondDontes

You danced on a dead players body and are telling yourself you weren't being rude or gloating?

malistorr

Personally I just think tea-bagging is stupid and shows a lack of overall maturity but I know most don't agree with me. I actually never did it to anyone ever until last night. I was defending a scroll at a scroll temple and multiple players of the enemy alliance kept trying over and over to take it. My alliance was heavily outnumbered in the campaign/instance at the time. I kept killing them repeatedly and finally after killing the same player for about the 5th time in-a-row I did it. I felt I had earned it I guess and so many people do it to me. After I did it I just felt like it was kind of stupid and childish so I doubt I'll do it again. I'm middle-aged though and a professional with kids. I know I'm not the average ESO player and don't have "majority" views. Plenty of people I play with do it to the enemy but it's usually after our group overcomes really outnumbered odds and they finally get to kill someone who just zerged them down with a group several times in-a-row and did it to them 1st. If you aren't the one getting the kill, or you kill someone outnumbered then yeah, I'd suggest not doing it. It makes you look a bit foolish IMO. That's a drawback of being a healer I guess and maybe not "fair" but it is what it is. Also, people bag me after zerging me down in a big group and I just think "what a ***".

DaisyRay

EdmondDontes wrote: »

You danced on a dead players body and are telling yourself you weren't being rude or gloating?

No, I didn't. I thought it was just a bit of fun and proud moment for me. No one else has ever said anything about it. Which is why I brought it here for an honest opinion.

DaisyRay

malistorr wrote: »

Personally I just think tea-bagging is stupid and shows a lack of overall maturity but I know most don't agree with me. I actually never did it to anyone ever until last night. I was defending a scroll at a scroll temple and multiple players of the enemy alliance kept trying over and over to take it. My alliance was heavily outnumbered in the campaign/instance at the time. I kept killing them repeatedly and finally after killing the same player for about the 5th time in-a-row I did it. I felt I had earned it I guess and so many people do it to me. After I did it I just felt like it was kind of stupid and childish so I doubt I'll do it again. I'm middle-aged though and a professional with kids. I know I'm not the average ESO player and don't have "majority" views. Plenty of people I play with do it to the enemy but it's usually after our group overcomes really outnumbered odds and they finally get to kill someone who just zerged them down with a group several times in-a-row and did it to them 1st. If you aren't the one getting the kill, or you kill someone outnumbered then yeah, I'd suggest not doing it. It makes you look a bit foolish IMO. That's a drawback of being a healer I guess and maybe not "fair" but it is what it is. Also, people bag me after zerging me down in a big group and I just think "what a ***".

I usually don't mind when people tbag me. I find it hilarious. I don't do it to other people, but I do it to my friends. Even in PVE. I guess I just don't take the game that seriously and it's okay for those who do. I'll just avoid dances too. Even if I don't mind it, I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings or make them upset.

DaisyRay

FluffyReachWitch wrote: »

Maybe you didn't get the kill, but you get to be proud of yourself for surviving the gank attempts and keeping them on their toes until help arrived. In fact, I think you earned your dance.

All sorts of heated things get said in PvP whether they're deserved or not, and more likely than not the Nightblade was frustrated after their ambush backfired. But emoting over a body after a stressful battle is common and usually harmless, and most people will just respawn to get back in the game instead of waiting around to let people /dance or /shovel or /sweep next to them.

That's precisely how I felt. Oh well.

malistorr

I don't take the game too seriously. I think that's 1-reason why I never did bag anyone even if they did it to me. I just feel it's immature period. And like I said I know I'm in the minority and most won't agree with me. When people do it to me it doesn't make me angry. I'm used to it. But in my mind I still just picture a sweaty 19-year old boy playing from their parent's house after a day of pretending to look for a job. The good news for me I guess is that after a long time I'm getting pretty good at PVP so I don't have nearly as many opportunities to get bagged anymore.

TechMaybeHic

So when I first was pvping near launch; I remember my first time thwarting a NB can't, and I did much worse than dance. Truth is though; I was a bad player. Maybe I still am but a far cry from that. Thwarted gank attempts are common. Dying to it is an exception. Why would I bother to give it a second thought? Maybe if I know the person and it's kind of a friendly jest.

Point is; unless you know the person, it's more of a reflection of yourself. Act like you've been there before.

OBJnoob

Hate to say it OP but I agree with everyone else... It was a lot like tbagging and they probably didn't appreciate it. That being said? Their appreciation or lack thereof doesn't matter really-- you had good intentions, you're just having fun, I say dance if you want to.

DaisyRay

malistorr wrote: »

I don't take the game too seriously. I think that's 1-reason why I never did bag anyone even if they did it to me. I just feel it's immature period. And like I said I know I'm in the minority and most won't agree with me. When people do it to me it doesn't make me angry. I'm used to it. But in my mind I still just picture a sweaty 19-year old boy playing from their parent's house after a day of pretending to look for a job. The good news for me I guess is that after a long time I'm getting pretty good at PVP so I don't have nearly as many opportunities to get bagged anymore.

I guess that's one way to look at it. When people bag me, I just see it as we had a fun fight but they won. I don't think it has an age limit, but I am a millennial so maybe our age does play a part in how we perceive it. I'm glad you're getting better though and maybe one day I'll avoid bags. Until then, I don't mind it. I only mind if they do something gross like do push ups on my corpse.

DaisyRay

TechMaybeHic wrote: »

So when I first was pvping near launch; I remember my first time thwarting a NB can't, and I did much worse than dance. Truth is though; I was a bad player. Maybe I still am but a far cry from that. Thwarted gank attempts are common. Dying to it is an exception. Why would I bother to give it a second thought? Maybe if I know the person and it's kind of a friendly jest.

Point is; unless you know the person, it's more of a reflection of yourself. Act like you've been there before.

Lol I don't avoid them often. Nightblades is the only class that really scares me.

VaranisArano

My PVP guild did not allow us to teabag, /sweep, etc. our dead opponents when we had our guild tabards on. We could /bow, but didn't do it that often unless we knew the opposing player. We mostly laughed it off whenever someone would emote at us when we died, especially if it was someone who hadn't contributed much to the fight.

There's not really an "etiquette" to it that everyone will agree to, but I personally don't do or say anything to an opponent unless it's a sincere compliment or something like "I see by your name you're a fellow Dune fan" to a guy who killed me in IC.

You do what you like, but it's sort of like gesturing at someone in traffic. You never know where their head is and it can escalate pretty fast.

DaisyRay

VaranisArano wrote: »

My PVP guild did not allow us to teabag, /sweep, etc. our dead opponents when we had our guild tabards on. We could /bow, but didn't do it that often unless we knew the opposing player. We mostly laughed it off whenever someone would emote at us when we died, especially if it was someone who hadn't contributed much to the fight.

There's not really an "etiquette" to it that everyone will agree to, but I personally don't do or say anything to an opponent unless it's a sincere compliment or something like "I see by your name you're a fellow Dune fan" to a guy who killed me in IC.

You do what you like, but it's sort of like gesturing at someone in traffic. You never know where their head is and it can escalate pretty fast.

I like and agree with this. You make a very good point.

ezmaye

In my experience people who send whispers in pvp after they die are the people who tbag etc. They just get mad you did it to them. They take it way too seriously.

I've experienced it many times where I have killed someone and they send a hare whisper. Then they actively hunt me, kill me and then Tbag. Just not nessecary.

I believe dancing on the other player in your scenario is OK. I see that less offensive than tbagging. I personally wouldn't have done it myself but if that happened to me I wouldn't be bothered.

Didgerion

jaws343 wrote: »

If you didn't get the kill, definitely don't dance over the corpse unless you want to be seen as gloating for something you didn't do.

No better than when a group of 10 will chase one guy and then teabag them after they kill them. Like good job, you 10v1'd someone.

That is non-sense! She didn't do anything wrong! She was dancing because she was happy she survived the attack!

NB should have fallen back when the reinforcement arrived.

Sometimes players duel in Cyrodiil true, if that's the case then usually the party that is getting helped just stops the attacks and let his opponent to deal with the player that interfere.
But they were not dueling! NB would not leave her alone and she had no way to retreat!

Dancing is not disrespectful! Tbaging is, wiping is...but not dancing!

BTW for this kind of scenarios I always carry the invisibility pots with me. I got away alive form so many chases of the courageous enemy groups, they won't stop chasing me until dead or until they no longer see me.

theoriginalpickle

DaisyRay wrote: »

EdmondDontes wrote: »

You danced on a dead players body and are telling yourself you weren't being rude or gloating?

No, I didn't. I thought it was just a bit of fun and proud moment for me. No one else has ever said anything about it. Which is why I brought it here for an honest opinion.

Stuff these guys you dance to your hearts content, i don't pvp much at all if i get a kill on a wall during a zerg i'll do my little dance. You survived the guys just salty, i've seen worse from hardcore pvpers.

EdmondDontes

Didgerion wrote: »

jaws343 wrote: »

If you didn't get the kill, definitely don't dance over the corpse unless you want to be seen as gloating for something you didn't do.

No better than when a group of 10 will chase one guy and then teabag them after they kill them. Like good job, you 10v1'd someone.

That is non-sense! She didn't do anything wrong! She was dancing because she was happy she survived the attack!

NB should have fallen back when the reinforcement arrived.

Sometimes players duel in Cyrodiil true, if that's the case then usually the party that is getting helped just stops the attacks and let his opponent to deal with the player that interfere.
But they were not dueling! NB would not leave her alone and she had no way to retreat!

Dancing is not disrespectful! Tbaging is, wiping is...but not dancing!

BTW for this kind of scenarios I always carry the invisibility pots with me. I got away alive form so many chases of the courageous enemy groups, they won't stop chasing me until dead or until they no longer see me.

Any type of gloating is disrespectful.

DaisyRay

Thank you for joining me in my rendition of AITA. After reading through all of the conversations, it appears that the majority has dubbed me as the wrongdoer. So, regardless of what I think, I will adhere to this and adjust my behavior accordingly. I may have many opinions and even mildly troll in PVP, but I never intentionally offend anyone. So I'll accept thy judgment and stop dancing or even lingering too long after my attempted murderer perishes.

Thank You Again

WreckfulAbandon

What you did wasnt toxic at all. I would say dance your heart out if you wanna, some take themselves way too seriously.

malistorr

Our whole culture has changed but that is a much bigger conversation. When I grew up in the 80's there were sitcoms where they taught moral lessons to kids. (Things like don't lie, cheat, steal, and be respectful to others) Parents actually liked their kids watching shows like this. For the past 20-years or so TV (and then things like YouTube and Tik Tok) has been "reality" shows and things like the Kardashians where all you see is people treating each other like crap, competing with each other with a "win at all-costs" mentality, lying, cheating, stealing. I'm no prude and I'm not even religious, I'm just explaining what I've seen over the past 40-years or so and how things have changed. So it's no surprise to me seeing how the moral decay of inputs fed to children and young adults over the past decades has led to people treating each other much worse over time. You can see it in the politicians too. In the 80s the 2-parties at least treated each other with basic respect. Now the politicians behave as if they're warring factions on the Jerry Springer show. People who grew up with good role models and positive inputs are respectful adults and those who don't, aren't. Basic human Psychology.

adirondack

Play the game have fun don’t worry. If you get upset remember you can turn off the computer anytime and (shudder) go outside. So can your opponent.

And I miss good wholesome TV like the Honeymooners and All In the Family. </sarcasm>

Rohamad_Ali

malistorr wrote: »

Our whole culture has changed but that is a much bigger conversation. When I grew up in the 80's there were sitcoms where they taught moral lessons to kids. (Things like don't lie, cheat, steal, and be respectful to others) Parents actually liked their kids watching shows like this. For the past 20-years or so TV (and then things like YouTube and Tik Tok) has been "reality" shows and things like the Kardashians where all you see is people treating each other like crap, competing with each other with a "win at all-costs" mentality, lying, cheating, stealing. I'm no prude and I'm not even religious, I'm just explaining what I've seen over the past 40-years or so and how things have changed. So it's no surprise to me seeing how the moral decay of inputs fed to children and young adults over the past decades has led to people treating each other much worse over time. You can see it in the politicians too. In the 80s the 2-parties at least treated each other with basic respect. Now the politicians behave as if they're warring factions on the Jerry Springer show. People who grew up with good role models and positive inputs are respectful adults and those who don't, aren't. Basic human Psychology.

This is truly enlightening. Television shows like the Dukes of Hazard taught morality. Day time soaps like All my children taught something too, not sure what but yes! Moral decay. All the reruns of I dream of Genie paid off in rubles for learning to be a servant. Or could the right thing been known all along in this ones conscience? Only for a barrage of 60's an 70's movies against society's norms left one confused to proper internet etiquette in the future? Perhaps... Perhaps the Walton's an Little house on the prairie were the acne of civilization. Indubitably.

malistorr

I was thinking more along the lines of the PSA at the end of every GI Joe cartoon or how a bunch of sitcoms would show a kid (maybe a friend of the main characters) getting in trouble for lying, cheating, stealing etc. and then at the end of the show they'd explain why it was wrong etc. I forget the exact shows that had said lessons (it's been a few decades) but remember plenty of them. Silver Spoons, Different Strokes, Punky Brewster, Facts of Life, Webster, Fresh Prince, Charles in Charge, etc. etc. I'm sure they were far from perfect shows but compared to what kids use for entertainment over the past decades or so it's no comparison at all.

ChunkyCat

Whenever someone sends you a mean whisper because of the PvPs, just respond with:

No hablo

If they persist with sending you messages, respond with the following:

La cucaracha ya no puede caminar.

You’re welcome.

DaisyRay

<.< Guys it's literally just a video game. I don't think anyone is going to go tbag a corpse in real life. I don't think rl stuff really applies to a video game. To each their own though.

ZOS_Volpe

Greetings,

We have recently removed some unnecessary back and forth from this thread. This is a reminder to keep the discussion civil and constructive. Please keep our Community Rules in mind moving forward.

acastanza_ESO

Honestly when I get whispers like that I just ignore them.
If they want to be that mad, let them rage to the wind.