Defeating deep Daedric plots - with farm tools

Tesman85

I just finished the Deadlands DLC and noticed something. Namely, whenever there is some Daedric/magical infernal machine or orb or something to destroy, our characters almost always just smash it to pieces with a simple hammer! Sometimes, it's an axe. This time I especially noticed it and the realization amused me to no end, since I played the DLC story with my Breton magsorc. In fact, the smash happened at least four times during the story, not to mention the countless times in other questlines. Shouldn't a character who supposedly is an expert in magic use something a bit more refined, not to mention less risky? It can't be that great an idea to have a go at a glowing nuclear weapon-equivalent magic-contraption with a damn hammer, after all!

Mind you, I'm not exactly complaining and definitely not bashing ZOS. Yes, the serious half of me wishes there would be different animations for this suited for different classes (like the sorcere doing some magical hand-waves etc.), but the camp humour-loving half of me had great time chuckling at the Looney Tunesy concept. This time, the hammer-smash animation even had this awesome addition where the character practically leaped to deal a blow! Great stuff.

One would think the Daedra would build their world-domination machines with a bit sturdier materials, but well, what do I know?

So, ladies and gentlemen, behold the refined sorceress Éloisë Lavalliére accomplishing some delicate magical operations:



And then the axe (egad, where does she even keep that huge thing?):

Vevvev

Remember a new player getting angry at me when I suggested digging up their treasure maps they kept neglecting. Went on and on about how they would never buy a shovel for that kind of stuff. (They came from EverQuest I think)

Had a "Horse Pocket" moment with them lol. "Just interact with it and you'll pull out a shovel from the ether and dig a hole."

https://youtu.be/zvEe3Y3B2cg

Tesman85

Vevvev wrote: »

Remember a new player getting angry at me when I suggested digging up their treasure maps they kept neglecting. Went on and on about how they would never buy a shovel for that kind of stuff. (They came from EverQuest I think)

Had a "Horse Pocket" moment with them lol. "Just interact with it and you'll pull out a shovel from the ether and dig a hole."

https://youtu.be/zvEe3Y3B2cg

Yeah, the saddle bags must be huge, or the characters have the world's biggest and most invisible backpacks

Oh, and here's a depiction of the sophisticated art of removing magical graffiti (in Fargrave). There's no problem one can't solve with a hammer and a bit of vandalism, eh?

Finedaible

The hammer is actually Sunder disguised by an illusion. Can't let the Tribunal or Divayth Fyr know you have it or they'll want it.

Tesman85

Finedaible wrote: »

The hammer is actually Sunder disguised by an illusion. Can't let the Tribunal or Divayth Fyr know you have it or they'll want it.

Hey, that's actually a good explanation! Or then the hammer is some Daedric artifact in the vein of the Fork of Horripilation. Maybe Sheogorath created it to troll ambitious wannabe evil overlords - all that trouble to build a huge machine/orb/whatever of DOOM, and all it takes to blow everything into smithereens is a moderately vigorous strike of a hammer. So, maybe it's named Sheogorath's Smash-Hammer or something?

Paulytnz

Hmmmmm interesting. I would look at it this way:

Why the heck haven't we got a simple hammer weapon skin yet or a new weapon and skill line to go with it - Hammer! It's hammer time!

Tesman85

Paulytnz wrote: »

Hmmmmm interesting. I would look at it this way:

Why the heck haven't we got a simple hammer weapon skin yet or a new weapon and skill line to go with it - Hammer! It's hammer time!

Yes, that's a brilliant idea! I'd also like an achievement and a memento after doing this smash-thing for something like 10 or 20 times. "Orb-Crusher", or something. It would be a funny thing to do when bored, just whipping out the Hammer of Doom and bashing an ominously glowing magic ball.

Gleitfrosch

Paulytnz wrote: »

Hmmmmm interesting. I would look at it this way:

Why the heck haven't we got a simple hammer weapon skin yet or a new weapon and skill line to go with it - Hammer! It's hammer time!

Only if we also get the mc hammer dance emote.

Brrrofski

Some things you just give a quick double jab combo and punch it out of existence, which always makes me laugh.

VaranisArano

It happens a ton in the base game as well.

Varanis Arano rather enjoys the amount of puzzles she solves by brute force trial-and-error, looking at the solutions carved on the walls, and smashing things with a hammer while everyone else looks at her in amazement at her heroic prowess.

If you know the movie The Emperor's New Groove, just imagine Varanis cackling delightedly like Yzma while she does it.

Finedaible

Paulytnz wrote: »

Hmmmmm interesting. I would look at it this way:

Why the heck haven't we got a simple hammer weapon skin yet or a new weapon and skill line to go with it - Hammer! It's hammer time!

Well, there's the 1-handed hammer style you get for Grand Master Crafter: https://eso.mmo-fashion.com/skyforge-smith-hammer/

It even has some electric effects around it. Wish there were more things like this to obtain.

runa_gate

Quite a few motifs have maces that are hammers

Tesman85

Wonder of wonders, I got to destroy more floating orbs during a quest, but for once there was no hammer! Behold:



I have to say prefer the said tools, though. In comparison it was kind of lame to see my character twiddling with her hands like she was shuffling invisible papers, and that was that. The primal satisfaction of violent destruction was wholly missing, alas. How about something in between, ZOS? Like some semi-showy hand wave and zapping the orb to pieces with a bit of magical fire or something? That would be about perfect at least for sorcerers.

VaranisArano wrote: »

It happens a ton in the base game as well.

Varanis Arano rather enjoys the amount of puzzles she solves by brute force trial-and-error, looking at the solutions carved on the walls, and smashing things with a hammer while everyone else looks at her in amazement at her heroic prowess.

Heh, yes, it's endlessly amusing how all NPCs think our characters are the greatest geniuses ever for solving a puzzle that a clever crow could figure out. But hey, it's nice to feel appreciated!

runa_gate wrote: »

Quite a few motifs have maces that are hammers

Oh, my! Gotta do some shopping at the guild traders, it seems.

Brrrofski wrote: »

Some things you just give a quick double jab combo and punch it out of existence, which always makes me laugh.

Yep, they really don't make evil contraptions anymore like in the old times. They just won't last nowadays.

Varana

There once was a page on the UESP listing all the random items your character pulls out of their inventory from time to time - hammer, shovel, broom, fishing rod, etc.
Unfortunately, I can't find it any more.

katanagirl1

Brrrofski wrote: »

Some things you just give a quick double jab combo and punch it out of existence, which always makes me laugh.

That’s like the wiggly hand motion my toon made when closing the portals at the Voidmother boss in the Reach for one of the daily quests. It’s the most odd thing, and I don’t think I’ve seen it anywhere else. It makes me laugh, too!

Jaimeh

This post reminded me of a quote by Lyris in the Markarth main quest:



And yeah, it would be nice if they updated animations so that the Vestige would do something more intricate than smashing (or at least use a different farm tool ), but it's also a bit funny, so I don't mind it.

Ippokrates

Nah, it is a TES game - you can walk it through with a fork.

Mushroomancer

Glad I'm not the only one that's amused by this. Me and my friends always joked that all these tools are secretly some sort of incredibly powerful aedric/daedric artifact with the power of shattering anything even vaguely related to the fabric of reality.

SickleCider

My favorite was in Fargrave. My MagSorc and his companion, also a MagSorc, traveling back in time a couple minutes to grab torches. The irresponsible use of time travel + the absolutely mundane torches. "This is the stupidest thing I've ever seen," my friend said. We both had strained laughter.

Gleitfrosch

It reminds me of the Batman series with Adam West.

Bastian: Holy spellcraft Vestige, that is a huge magic stone.
Vestige: Indeed Bastian, but luckily I have my Vestige Hammer with me to crush it

KA-POW!

NANANANANANANA- VESTIGE!

Tesman85

Gleitfrosch wrote: »

It reminds me of the Batman series with Adam West.

Bastian: Holy spellcraft Vestige, that is a huge magic stone.
Vestige: Indeed Bastian, but luckily I have my Vestige Hammer with me to crush it

KA-POW!

NANANANANANANA- VESTIGE!

Ooh, I so want to see this scene as a cartoon!