why would anyone invite someone to a dating site on eso?!

Abigail

There are quite a few sexual predators playing ESO. One notable example is a very high level werewolf with the drunk personality who frequents the southern dolmen in Auridon. He's always hitting on newb female characters in public chat, telling them how sexy they are and inviting them to see his residence. I've ignored him enough that he's quit hitting on me, but he's always after others. I imagine the scenario is he offers them free gear and helps them with a few quests then takes them back to his residence where he gets them to lie down whereupon he does pushups on them (one can only imagine what he's doing in real life). It happened to me one time when I first started playing way way back and I was revolted -- deleted my character and went to a new start zone. Not all hookups are so innocent.

Goregrinder

jircris11 wrote: »

Blinx wrote: »

[quote="Goregrinder;c-7299121"That's pretty much a Facebook bot roaming around on ESO.

the gamer is listed in my recently played with tabs, met doing one of the geysers in summerset, I don;t think bots actually play, but I could be wrong

They do and do not. There us always ONE live person contoling that train.[/quote]

I'm not referring a multiboxer with 8 accounts following his main account. I'm talking about the random invites you get on Facebook, that look like the profile of a woman, usually some sort of model, trying to add you. Those are Facebook bots. This is just the ESO equivalent. It's probably a real human, but either trying to fish for info, or scam you, or maybe...they are legitimately looking for love, I don't know. But the Facebook bots are 100% fake.

xv1_me

You gotta understand. Majority of male player base don’t know how to interact with females so they either troll, simp, or try to hook up in a game. That’s just how it is, it’s pathetic but just try and enjoy the game and not worry about the people so much.

gariondavey

Abigail wrote: »

There are quite a few sexual predators playing ESO. One notable example is a very high level werewolf with the drunk personality who frequents the southern dolmen in Auridon. He's always hitting on newb female characters in public chat, telling them how sexy they are and inviting them to see his residence. I've ignored him enough that he's quit hitting on me, but he's always after others. I imagine the scenario is he offers them free gear and helps them with a few quests then takes them back to his residence where he gets them to lie down whereupon he does pushups on them (one can only imagine what he's doing in real life). It happened to me one time when I first started playing way way back and I was revolted -- deleted my character and went to a new start zone. Not all hookups are so innocent.

Have to admit, I laughed so hard at this. It is sad that this happens, of course, but the sheer madness of this hit my funny bone

Urusovite

Blinx wrote: »

I was actually playing a male character, and the message sent to me was " Hi, I really enjoyed our game add me on (dating website), my nickname is (hot********), maybe we can get to know each other"

Umm… that’s a bot, brother. They’re all over PSN. You get random PS messages and occasionally in-game messages the exact same all the time. The best way to tell is to respond with something totally unrelated like “Did you know the Sun will explode in billions of years?” The reply will prove it’s automated.

As for the dating nonsense, yes people do it. What do you think an E-girl is? Super silly but what can you do? Girls are breaking lonely mens hearts on MMOs all the time selling themselves for in-game rewards. It’s the lowest of lows.

Sju

I don't doubt it. Lots of creepy thirst on ps4. Turning off chat does wonders for your sanity.

amapola76

Danikat wrote: »

I think there's a clear difference between "I really like the way you combined those motifs, nice [whatever] theme" or even "that costume looks really good for your character, totally suits her aesthetic!" and "Hi, we just did X together, add me on this dating site!"

Yep. As someone who is a woman in real life, and plays mostly female alts (not that male characters don't get some unwanted attention, but in my experience it is much rarer), I can' tell you that I immediately know the difference between "Nice combination of dyes on that outfit, great job!" or "Where can I find that motif?" versus "woohoo, nice ***s!" or unsolicited and very explicit invitations to... highly specific types of RP.) It's really not as blurry of a line as some people like to act like it is.

Mind you, people may still not respond to the former type of comment, even if it's perfectly respectable. Maybe they don't see your whisper, maybe they're afk, maybe they're just busy. But it's not hard to figure what's actually likely to offend most people and what isn't.

That being said, I also saw way more of the inappropriate stuff playing WoW than I ever have on ESO, so I'm grateful for that.

But back to the OP, I know people who've met and started IRL relationships online, but it's usually something that develops gradually over time, through guild or similar platonic relationships. But this particular

Danikat

Urusovite wrote: »

Blinx wrote: »

I was actually playing a male character, and the message sent to me was " Hi, I really enjoyed our game add me on (dating website), my nickname is (hot********), maybe we can get to know each other"

Umm… that’s a bot, brother. They’re all over PSN. You get random PS messages and occasionally in-game messages the exact same all the time. The best way to tell is to respond with something totally unrelated like “Did you know the Sun will explode in billions of years?” The reply will prove it’s automated.

That still works? Wow. About 20 years ago when chat bots were all the rage in AI circles and people were claiming some could pass the Turing Test (a human wouldn't be able to tell them apart from a real person) I'd break a lot of them simply by ignoring whatever they said and asking irrelevant questions like "What's your favourite Nirvana song?" or "Back me up on this, rhinos are basically unicorns, right?". Because it didn't fit the format of expected chat room small talk they didn't have scripted responses and would either spit out nonsense or search results like "I understand Nirvana's best selling song is Smells Like Teen Spirit from the 1991 album Nevermind".

I stopped following the research a while ago but I assumed they'd have progressed beyond that point by now, but maybe scammers aren't using the best tech?

FlopsyPrince

I would love to find someone I found attractive that I found attractive and we both played ESO.

I don't expect the first 2 to ever happen, let alone the subset of the final part, so I can't see pinging anyone in game though.

I have become a GIRL (Guy in real life) with mostly female characters (a switch I made after playing another MMO where I didn't like the look of the male characters) so anyone that tried to hook up based on how my character looked would be quite surprised.

I have been surprised to find far more women who play than I expected. That was not my experience earlier in my gaming life, and that stretches back to almost the start of PC gaming. It is a bit of an interesting shift and I only know that from when I ran with guild chat on the PS4.

That seems a shift, even from my WoW days (Cata to Mists) which also had some, but more limited, women playing from what I could tell.

Goregrinder

Danikat wrote: »

Urusovite wrote: »

Blinx wrote: »

I was actually playing a male character, and the message sent to me was " Hi, I really enjoyed our game add me on (dating website), my nickname is (hot********), maybe we can get to know each other"

Umm… that’s a bot, brother. They’re all over PSN. You get random PS messages and occasionally in-game messages the exact same all the time. The best way to tell is to respond with something totally unrelated like “Did you know the Sun will explode in billions of years?” The reply will prove it’s automated.

That still works? Wow. About 20 years ago when chat bots were all the rage in AI circles and people were claiming some could pass the Turing Test (a human wouldn't be able to tell them apart from a real person) I'd break a lot of them simply by ignoring whatever they said and asking irrelevant questions like "What's your favourite Nirvana song?" or "Back me up on this, rhinos are basically unicorns, right?". Because it didn't fit the format of expected chat room small talk they didn't have scripted responses and would either spit out nonsense or search results like "I understand Nirvana's best selling song is Smells Like Teen Spirit from the 1991 album Nevermind".

I stopped following the research a while ago but I assumed they'd have progressed beyond that point by now, but maybe scammers aren't using the best tech?

Yeah it still works, it's just only slightly harder to break a bot.

Danikat

FlopsyPrince wrote: »

I would love to find someone I found attractive that I found attractive and we both played ESO.

I don't expect the first 2 to ever happen, let alone the subset of the final part, so I can't see pinging anyone in game though.

I have become a GIRL (Guy in real life) with mostly female characters (a switch I made after playing another MMO where I didn't like the look of the male characters) so anyone that tried to hook up based on how my character looked would be quite surprised.

I have been surprised to find far more women who play than I expected. That was not my experience earlier in my gaming life, and that stretches back to almost the start of PC gaming. It is a bit of an interesting shift and I only know that from when I ran with guild chat on the PS4.

That seems a shift, even from my WoW days (Cata to Mists) which also had some, but more limited, women playing from what I could tell.

In my experience women have always been playing computer games (I started with the ZX Spectrum in the 80's) but we didn't talk about it very much and guys almost never thought to ask. Particularly online, the majority of men assumed all the other players were men and if you corrected them there was a good chance someone would either try to flirt, make stupid comments endlessly or seemingly just start panicking that a woman was in "their" game so it was easier to say nothing and just get on with playing the game.

FlopsyPrince

Danikat wrote: »

FlopsyPrince wrote: »

I would love to find someone I found attractive that I found attractive and we both played ESO.

I don't expect the first 2 to ever happen, let alone the subset of the final part, so I can't see pinging anyone in game though.

I have become a GIRL (Guy in real life) with mostly female characters (a switch I made after playing another MMO where I didn't like the look of the male characters) so anyone that tried to hook up based on how my character looked would be quite surprised.

I have been surprised to find far more women who play than I expected. That was not my experience earlier in my gaming life, and that stretches back to almost the start of PC gaming. It is a bit of an interesting shift and I only know that from when I ran with guild chat on the PS4.

That seems a shift, even from my WoW days (Cata to Mists) which also had some, but more limited, women playing from what I could tell.

In my experience women have always been playing computer games (I started with the ZX Spectrum in the 80's) but we didn't talk about it very much and guys almost never thought to ask. Particularly online, the majority of men assumed all the other players were men and if you corrected them there was a good chance someone would either try to flirt, make stupid comments endlessly or seemingly just start panicking that a woman was in "their" game so it was easier to say nothing and just get on with playing the game.

Could be, but I saw very few women at things like the early CGDC I attended and in the large number of reviews I wrote, though one of my editors was female.

I know the outward landscape has changed at least. I can understand how some women would be quiet with so many male gamers wanting attention though....

Goregrinder

FlopsyPrince wrote: »

Danikat wrote: »

FlopsyPrince wrote: »

I would love to find someone I found attractive that I found attractive and we both played ESO.

I don't expect the first 2 to ever happen, let alone the subset of the final part, so I can't see pinging anyone in game though.

I have become a GIRL (Guy in real life) with mostly female characters (a switch I made after playing another MMO where I didn't like the look of the male characters) so anyone that tried to hook up based on how my character looked would be quite surprised.

I have been surprised to find far more women who play than I expected. That was not my experience earlier in my gaming life, and that stretches back to almost the start of PC gaming. It is a bit of an interesting shift and I only know that from when I ran with guild chat on the PS4.

That seems a shift, even from my WoW days (Cata to Mists) which also had some, but more limited, women playing from what I could tell.

In my experience women have always been playing computer games (I started with the ZX Spectrum in the 80's) but we didn't talk about it very much and guys almost never thought to ask. Particularly online, the majority of men assumed all the other players were men and if you corrected them there was a good chance someone would either try to flirt, make stupid comments endlessly or seemingly just start panicking that a woman was in "their" game so it was easier to say nothing and just get on with playing the game.

Could be, but I saw very few women at things like the early CGDC I attended and in the large number of reviews I wrote, though one of my editors was female.

I know the outward landscape has changed at least. I can understand how some women would be quiet with so many male gamers wanting attention though....

There are definitely more women gaming in general these days than say 20 years ago, but it's still mostly male dominated. I think one reason is we are just more interested in general with gaming then women are in general. I'm pretty sure women have always been gaming, even in the OG DnD days, but if you compare it by market share, the gaming market share of women in say the 90's was probably like 5% or something, and now in 2021 it jumped to probably 30% maybe 40% in general.

jacktalkthai

VaxtinTheWolf wrote: »

This is why I'm sometimes nervous about whispering a compliment towards a character whose outfit of overall appearance may have caught my eye for one reason or another. You never know how the recipient will react to it.

I just shout them out in zone chat when someone looks badass.

Sarannah

You never know where you meet 'the one'... but yeah, hitting on players in a game seems silly. Not saying it couldn't work out, but the odds of that happening are practically non-existant. Not to mention, you never know who is on the other side of the screen, unless you meet them in real-life.

Would be fun to have/find a partner who played ESO though!

Pauwer

Goregrinder wrote: »

FlopsyPrince wrote: »

Danikat wrote: »

FlopsyPrince wrote: »

I would love to find someone I found attractive that I found attractive and we both played ESO.

I don't expect the first 2 to ever happen, let alone the subset of the final part, so I can't see pinging anyone in game though.

I have become a GIRL (Guy in real life) with mostly female characters (a switch I made after playing another MMO where I didn't like the look of the male characters) so anyone that tried to hook up based on how my character looked would be quite surprised.

I have been surprised to find far more women who play than I expected. That was not my experience earlier in my gaming life, and that stretches back to almost the start of PC gaming. It is a bit of an interesting shift and I only know that from when I ran with guild chat on the PS4.

That seems a shift, even from my WoW days (Cata to Mists) which also had some, but more limited, women playing from what I could tell.

In my experience women have always been playing computer games (I started with the ZX Spectrum in the 80's) but we didn't talk about it very much and guys almost never thought to ask. Particularly online, the majority of men assumed all the other players were men and if you corrected them there was a good chance someone would either try to flirt, make stupid comments endlessly or seemingly just start panicking that a woman was in "their" game so it was easier to say nothing and just get on with playing the game.

Could be, but I saw very few women at things like the early CGDC I attended and in the large number of reviews I wrote, though one of my editors was female.

I know the outward landscape has changed at least. I can understand how some women would be quiet with so many male gamers wanting attention though....

There are definitely more women gaming in general these days than say 20 years ago, but it's still mostly male dominated. I think one reason is we are just more interested in general with gaming then women are in general. I'm pretty sure women have always been gaming, even in the OG DnD days, but if you compare it by market share, the gaming market share of women in say the 90's was probably like 5% or something, and now in 2021 it jumped to probably 30% maybe 40% in general.

Im not sure at all that majority of eso players are men. In all my guilds, i would say there are more women players than men. And when we voice chat in a random pug pvp group or similar, there are usually more women than men.

And yeh, i get messages from bots called something in the lines of "hotgal69" and stuff always, for lords know what sites to visit and join. Bots all around.

VaxtinTheWolf

Just adding to what I mentioned earlier, I wasn't aware how obvious the issue was that OP was referring to until they actually mentioned what was said to them. For myself I just have a concern someone might get offended, because for whatever reason some individuals can be that way, and be rude about it. When there are replies though, most seem to show appreciation and they might talk a little bit about what they were going for, but for the most part I don't get responses. Then I just feel awkward they might think Im weird for calling their character cute or something.

NylAR

Pauwer wrote: »

Goregrinder wrote: »

FlopsyPrince wrote: »

Danikat wrote: »

FlopsyPrince wrote: »

I would love to find someone I found attractive that I found attractive and we both played ESO.

I don't expect the first 2 to ever happen, let alone the subset of the final part, so I can't see pinging anyone in game though.

I have become a GIRL (Guy in real life) with mostly female characters (a switch I made after playing another MMO where I didn't like the look of the male characters) so anyone that tried to hook up based on how my character looked would be quite surprised.

I have been surprised to find far more women who play than I expected. That was not my experience earlier in my gaming life, and that stretches back to almost the start of PC gaming. It is a bit of an interesting shift and I only know that from when I ran with guild chat on the PS4.

That seems a shift, even from my WoW days (Cata to Mists) which also had some, but more limited, women playing from what I could tell.

In my experience women have always been playing computer games (I started with the ZX Spectrum in the 80's) but we didn't talk about it very much and guys almost never thought to ask. Particularly online, the majority of men assumed all the other players were men and if you corrected them there was a good chance someone would either try to flirt, make stupid comments endlessly or seemingly just start panicking that a woman was in "their" game so it was easier to say nothing and just get on with playing the game.

Could be, but I saw very few women at things like the early CGDC I attended and in the large number of reviews I wrote, though one of my editors was female.

I know the outward landscape has changed at least. I can understand how some women would be quiet with so many male gamers wanting attention though....

There are definitely more women gaming in general these days than say 20 years ago, but it's still mostly male dominated. I think one reason is we are just more interested in general with gaming then women are in general. I'm pretty sure women have always been gaming, even in the OG DnD days, but if you compare it by market share, the gaming market share of women in say the 90's was probably like 5% or something, and now in 2021 it jumped to probably 30% maybe 40% in general.

Im not sure at all that majority of eso players are men. In all my guilds, i would say there are more women players than men. And when we voice chat in a random pug pvp group or similar, there are usually more women than men.

And yeh, i get messages from bots called something in the lines of "hotgal69" and stuff always, for lords know what sites to visit and join. Bots all around.

Ofc it depends on what the game offers. Some games will be more prefered by women because it simply appeals to their nature more. The Sims is a perfect example. Both women and men play it, but there's way higher percentage of women playing it. Always has been.

Not sure whether biological or cultural base plays a role in this but in the end, none of this actually matters.

Also... Can men please stop obsessing over women playing videogames? It's stupid, creepy, disgusting, childish and extremely annoying.

Linaleah

I met one of my closest friends in WoW, and several more people I'm friends to this day with and have met in RL - in SWTOR and via Mass Effect fandom. the best friend from WoW, we got to chatting cause their character name was of a character from both of our favorite book series (or at least one of the favorite book series)

so you never know. romance though... I mean.. I can see it happening, but call me shallow or whatnot, but part of romance for me, personaly is finding the other person attractive physically. how do you do that, going off of digital avatar alone? moreover - how do you just go for it without getting to know a person first? it just seems.... desperate. and/or trolling.

SidraWillowsky

what_the wrote: »

Blinx wrote: »

seriously, I play the game, to play the game, are people actually trying to get a hook-up on eso, cuz thats just sad imo.
I do not use a mic, or text much in game, so what would anyone find attractive about me?, I just lol'd, then got creeped out and logged.

or maybe its just the fist part of a scam...

It's all fun and games until they try to recruit you for their essential oil pyramid scheme.

cynicalbutterfly

Abigail wrote: »

There are quite a few sexual predators playing ESO. One notable example is a very high level werewolf with the drunk personality who frequents the southern dolmen in Auridon. He's always hitting on newb female characters in public chat, telling them how sexy they are and inviting them to see his residence. I've ignored him enough that he's quit hitting on me, but he's always after others. I imagine the scenario is he offers them free gear and helps them with a few quests then takes them back to his residence where he gets them to lie down whereupon he does pushups on them (one can only imagine what he's doing in real life). It happened to me one time when I first started playing way way back and I was revolted -- deleted my character and went to a new start zone. Not all hookups are so innocent.

A few months back I had a similiar event occur. It was during the Clockwork/Morrowind event and I was on my female character. Had some random guy whisper me compliments about how hot my character is and he asked if I wanted to do a dungeon. I was like 'yea sure why not' but afterwards, he invited me to his house where let's just say he said some pretty graphic lines what he wanted to do to me. Personally, I thought it was funny as hell that this random guy was hitting on my character so I played along with it. But after looking at his psn profile, I could tell this wasn't the first time he'd done something like this and probably won't be the last. I deleted him from my list soon afterwards but I regret not reporting him. If he did it to me, how many others will he do it to? And how many of them won't be so keen to catch on to his act like I was..

FlopsyPrince

NylAR wrote: »

Also... Can men please stop obsessing over women playing videogames? It's stupid, creepy, disgusting, childish and extremely annoying.

I haven't seen anyone obsessing.

Noting that it has changed is merely noting it has changed.

Though I am an old "get off my lawn" fogey, so I have been around things a long time. I know what I have seen, both from the making and playing ends.

I wish I could have found a wife that liked playing games much earlier in my life!

FlopsyPrince

SidraWillowsky wrote: »

what_the wrote: »

Blinx wrote: »

seriously, I play the game, to play the game, are people actually trying to get a hook-up on eso, cuz thats just sad imo.
I do not use a mic, or text much in game, so what would anyone find attractive about me?, I just lol'd, then got creeped out and logged.

or maybe its just the fist part of a scam...

It's all fun and games until they try to recruit you for their essential oil pyramid scheme.

MLMs have some merits, but not for most personality types....

SilverBride

cynicalbutterfly wrote: »

A few months back I had a similiar event occur. It was during the Clockwork/Morrowind event and I was on my female character. Had some random guy whisper me compliments about how hot my character is and he asked if I wanted to do a dungeon. I was like 'yea sure why not' but afterwards, he invited me to his house where let's just say he said some pretty graphic lines what he wanted to do to me. Personally, I thought it was funny as hell that this random guy was hitting on my character so I played along with it. But after looking at his psn profile, I could tell this wasn't the first time he'd done something like this and probably won't be the last. I deleted him from my list soon afterwards but I regret not reporting him. If he did it to me, how many others will he do it to? And how many of them won't be so keen to catch on to his act like I was..

Report him for what?

You ran a dungeon with him after he told you your character was hot.
You went back to his house and didn't leave when he made explicit advances toward you.
You played along with it.

If you had told him no and he continued, then you could report him. But not in this scenario.

NylAR

FlopsyPrince wrote: »

NylAR wrote: »

Also... Can men please stop obsessing over women playing videogames? It's stupid, creepy, disgusting, childish and extremely annoying.

I haven't seen anyone obsessing.

Noting that it has changed is merely noting it has changed.

Though I am an old "get off my lawn" fogey, so I have been around things a long time. I know what I have seen, both from the making and playing ends.

I wish I could have found a wife that liked playing games much earlier in my life!

Oh believe me that most men (especially young men) are insanely obsessive of women in games when they find out, especially after we first speak on the mic. I can't tell you how many times I've had to deal with this stupidity and acting as if I was some sort of exotic Alien.

It can ruin your whole day if it happens enough of times.

gamergirldk

well try to say your a womenand then some ppl ask for nudes on snapchat to prove it... .. GTFO

BlueRaven

I know plenty of people who started dating by meeting each other playing a game online.
This is not that uncommon anymore.

notachik

It’s all in the name 😁

Brrrofski

It's just a bot or someone trying to scam or get you to sign up to their onlyfans lol.

I mean, the amount of money some people throw into the crown store, maybe they're a good target to sign up to their onlyfans...

Folkb

Grill! 😳