Hate whispers and toxicity

PrimusNephilim

Society has become more toxic and will bleed into whatever activities we involve ourselves in. I've been gaming for roughly 30 years, much of that has also been online and its always been very competitive. It used to be just that one guy who was a jerk and people would just ignore him but this rude behavior has evolved into something worse with this generation (my opinion only), people feel its ok to trash talk others without cause, whether its from a keyboard or on the streets, then they post it on some social media and get accolades for it, which seems to encourage more of that behavior....idiots

with a smile, I'd simply tell the scrubs to *** off and get a life

PN

vamp_emily

I just play in offline mode unless I really need to communicate with someone. You will never see a hate whisper again.

JanTanhide

If I reply at all I simply write "Grow up".

Sorry you had to go through that. I too have lost family to that disease including my spouse recently. People that hate are small minded people.

Radiance

I'm not making excuses for these people or saying this is acceptable in any way but hurt people hurt people. Try not to internalize their vitriol, it's not really about you bc they don't know you or anything about you. Just keep that in mind when someone behaves in this manner that they are a reflection of their environment and life circumstances. I don't tolerate hate speech in any capacity but when people say things for the sake of being hurtful when they are angry, I just feel pity for them bc again, whatever they're going through that causes them to lash out is not really about me.

Hallothiel

Haven’t had hate whispers, as on console & rarely do any pug stuff & not good enough in pvp to enraged anyone - but guild member kept comparing anyone disagreeing with them as ‘cancer talk’ - really do not like the use of the term for something so trivial as this, nor did most of the guild. Was warned & apologised.

But it has become more prevalent and it is obnoxious. As is not being able to cope with someone disagreeing with your opinion. People need to grow up!!

mairwen85

JanTanhide wrote: »

If I reply at all I simply write "Grow up".

A simple winky face has much more impact

ArcaneScientius

I m going to do the unthinkable and quote your own words to you:

Chapilliams wrote: »

...You don't know peoples stories, you don't know what they are dealing with - so with kindness you come a long way.

There is a lot of fear and anxiety in the world at the moment. Pandemics, terrorism, good ol' fashion bad politicians, etc. Loneliness and depression are often as toxic as hateful utterances. It can depend on your personality, your susceptibility to mental strain, or even whether you have pets.

Fear and anger are joined at the hip. Fight/flight is from one hormone. It moves decision making away from the prefrontal cortex, so logic and reason do not factor in. This is true of him, you and me; all us biological machines.

I understand that you have limited time and really do not want to be tutoring newbies, especially when they die to mobs. But, it may have been his first dungeon. Maybe he is just really bad at the game.

I understand why you left, but I also get that "lol L2P noob" is not exactly ... helpful. What class was he? Did he have any sets, even one, at 200CP? Sets make a massive difference. Just knowing how to use your skills makes a massive difference. Solo PvE and group PvE are massively different, especially if you have never run a raid in an MMO. The most basic mobs can pwn you. If you see him running ahead... there's your first sign.

Not everyone has played MMOs, and many in ESO come from old fashioned single player and could not resist the allure of One Tamriel.

PUGs are like gambling. Win some, lose some. I got ragged in AoC for failling to tank a raid I had never done, no one had explained the mechanics and I was built for PvP. I had even stated this before running with the group and I am guessing the chappo forgot that I had said this when he burst a head vein and probably cracked his keyboard. ... Ok. Good luck, chaps! was all I said, and went my merry way.

I got targeted the other day for having a dark skinned female red guard necromancer (yes, yes. I know. Not lore or mechanics friendly, but it is a fantasy game and she had her soul stolen, go figure.) I am cisgender male. Ok, wierdo guy who seemingly hates on pixels on a screen. Gud luck, adios!

Bud, people will find things to get angry about. It is a form of emotional release. It is that or break down crying. So it goes for all us psychotic apes inhabiting a primitive dirtball (credit: Nibbler).

People getting angry on the Interweb are like dogs on either sides of a fence, vicious because there is no danger of there being any resolution or retaliation. I remember my dog and the neighbours barking and snarling furiously at one another through the gate. I opened it (to settle it one way or another) and both clammed up and walked away without so much as a growl.

That will forever be my image of internet trolls. Caged dogs. All they really need is some love.

Ignore trolls, enjoy the game. If you decide to abandon a PUG, so be it. Mute the bugger. Move along.

Signed, your friendly orc who feels emotions for NPCs, gives game gold to game beggars, laughs at NPC jokes and marvels at how beautiful an imaginary game world can be.

inkstrider

To OP, IME some pugs are really insecure and can't handle any criticism, especially if it's about their personal DPS. Met a few like these before who would whisper nasty things if something you said or done offended them or their buddy. Even had a sulky one for not giving him my gear!

I ignored them at first. Felt that reporting was too much of a hassle. But if these behaviour don't get punished, they'd become more and more rampant.

A more convenient solution, as somebody else mentioned, is simply to appear offline whenever you pug. They can't whisper you that way, and you don't have to deal with their sh*t. Else, don't say hi so that your character name doesn't appear on chat at all. Or log off to another character and all they'd get is a "character not found" when they try to whisper you. Personally, I'd just leave whenever I see crappy DPS. Saves me from the frustration and wasted time. Just do your daily dungeon or level on another toon while waiting for the cooldown.

I take comfort that whatever I've said or done (i.e. leaving the dungeon, ignoring their unreasonable requests) pissed them off enough to turn them into such a frenzy. I tried returning the nastiness in one instance, but he made it a point to quickly put me on ignore cos he's probably afraid of what was coming. Talk about cowards. :Rolls eyes:

Jeremy

Chapilliams wrote: »

So, I was just doing the daily pledges - Vet Darkshade 2. I was running it on my healer, with a tank and 2 DD's. 1 dd with 810 cp and the other around 200-ish cp.
- The 200 CP already struggled with the first trash pull and died, cause he didn't have food on. Was telling him kindly to put some food on, cause he was running at around 11K.

I noticed rather quick that the dmg was low, I was running around 30% of the dmg with my healer - Having Hollow, olo and earthgore on. So when the 200-ish CP died again on the first boss I decided this wouldn't be worth the time. I then wrote in game I was leaving 'cause it would be too much of a struggle.
- Then the 200 cp decided hate whisper me telling me to get cancer.

Save to say I am shook about this. I was looking forward to having a nice chill sunday, playing some eso - but having lost family memebers to this awful disease, that cancer is. I am now instead forced to put energy into not letting this ruin my entire day and not letting a knob like that win.
- But this is just, yet another reminder of why I cannot stand doing anything group related in game (unless it's a premade group). The fun is taken out of it when you have to hear people either wishing the worst for you or someone on your team, because they have problems with themselves and their toxicity.

I know it's almost daily you see this, either in dungeons or in zone chats.
What goes on in peoples mind to feel like they can go around saying *** like this to others?
It's just a game - isn't this supposed to be a community where you can expand and have a fun chat with others? Get to know people ect.


I would love to see the consequences for people acting this way much bigger than they are.

Can't we all just be nice to one another instead of this?

You don't know peoples stories, you don't know what they are dealing with - so with kindness you come a long way.

That's why I find it's usually a good rule of thumb not to give out advice unless it's asked for.

I'll explain generally the "mechanics" of a boss fight after a wipe if it appears group members do not know them. But that's the extent of unsolicited advice I give out. Because a lot of people are understandably defensive on this game.

What I do when I'm on my healer and I join a group that's more trouble than it's worth to keep alive I just say "I think you guys need a better healer than me, so I'm going to drop so you can get one, good luck".

And then I leave group. So if whispers like this bother you (and they clearly do, even to the point of ruining your day) you may want to adopt a similar strategy when playing the game. Otherwise you're going to run the risk of people interpreting your advice as criticism and respond in kind.

jircris11

Grandchamp1989 wrote: »

No surprised.

The community are getting more toxic. I have gotten many hate whispers just for leaving.

Sorry it happened to you!
Some people need professional help.

That's any mmo...hell gaming community now days. It's sad but it's becoming a trend

Kurat

I'm sure there are some trolls and toxic elitists out there who like to rage, insult just cause. But most people dont send you hate whispers if you're not [snip]. Leaving dungeons because you dont approve someone's build, gameplay or cp level, while run is going half decent, deserves to be called out.

[Edited to remove Profanity]

Raideen

Kurat wrote: »

I'm sure there are some trolls and toxic elitists out there who like to rage, insult just cause. But most people dont send you hate whispers if you're not [snip]. Leaving dungeons because you dont approve someone's build, gameplay or cp level, while run is going half decent, deserves to be called out.

Agreed. As with all stories, there are two sides and we know one.

I also know that (as you stated) most people do not send rude messages unless they think they have a reason to do so. Most people in this regard are reactive, not active.

I can not take the OP's statement as an absolute, I need to hear all the information before I pass judgement.

Casul

Block, ignore, move on.

Dunning_Kruger

Hate whispering is bad!

Sephyr

ArcaneScientius wrote: »

I m going to do the unthinkable and quote your own words to you:

Chapilliams wrote: »

...You don't know peoples stories, you don't know what they are dealing with - so with kindness you come a long way.

There is a lot of fear and anxiety in the world at the moment. Pandemics, terrorism, good ol' fashion bad politicians, etc. Loneliness and depression are often as toxic as hateful utterances. It can depend on your personality, your susceptibility to mental strain, or even whether you have pets.

Fear and anger are joined at the hip. Fight/flight is from one hormone. It moves decision making away from the prefrontal cortex, so logic and reason do not factor in. This is true of him, you and me; all us biological machines.

I understand that you have limited time and really do not want to be tutoring newbies, especially when they die to mobs. But, it may have been his first dungeon. Maybe he is just really bad at the game.

I understand why you left, but I also get that "lol L2P noob" is not exactly ... helpful. What class was he? Did he have any sets, even one, at 200CP? Sets make a massive difference. Just knowing how to use your skills makes a massive difference. Solo PvE and group PvE are massively different, especially if you have never run a raid in an MMO. The most basic mobs can pwn you. If you see him running ahead... there's your first sign.

Not everyone has played MMOs, and many in ESO come from old fashioned single player and could not resist the allure of One Tamriel.

PUGs are like gambling. Win some, lose some. I got ragged in AoC for failling to tank a raid I had never done, no one had explained the mechanics and I was built for PvP. I had even stated this before running with the group and I am guessing the chappo forgot that I had said this when he burst a head vein and probably cracked his keyboard. ... Ok. Good luck, chaps! was all I said, and went my merry way.

I got targeted the other day for having a dark skinned female red guard necromancer (yes, yes. I know. Not lore or mechanics friendly, but it is a fantasy game and she had her soul stolen, go figure.) I am cisgender male. Ok, wierdo guy who seemingly hates on pixels on a screen. Gud luck, adios!

Bud, people will find things to get angry about. It is a form of emotional release. It is that or break down crying. So it goes for all us psychotic apes inhabiting a primitive dirtball (credit: Nibbler).

People getting angry on the Interweb are like dogs on either sides of a fence, vicious because there is no danger of there being any resolution or retaliation. I remember my dog and the neighbours barking and snarling furiously at one another through the gate. I opened it (to settle it one way or another) and both clammed up and walked away without so much as a growl.

That will forever be my image of internet trolls. Caged dogs. All they really need is some love.

Ignore trolls, enjoy the game. If you decide to abandon a PUG, so be it. Mute the bugger. Move along.

Signed, your friendly orc who feels emotions for NPCs, gives game gold to game beggars, laughs at NPC jokes and marvels at how beautiful an imaginary game world can be.

I don't think the OP told them that they had to "L2P", I think they just did what they said - left after stating that it's not working out, which is better than the rando-leaves I've had in the past. Their two posts on the matter didn't indicate it at all and having left some groups as well, I got similar vitriol before. Gave a warning that I had to bail, slew of insults and vitriol followed. Which reminds me why I hate the group finder.

As for the necromancer bit, I've been in the same boat. My StamCro's also a Redguard. I got some insults thrown at me, most of by some self-proclaimed 'lore master', who incidentally was apparently 'well liked' in the RP community. But I knew they were full of it when I asked them about what went down in Alik'r. There's a whole cult of Redguard necromancers called the Withered Hand there, there's even a Redguard necromancer that's a world boss at King's Rest. Oh! And the Pellingare Necromancers are in fact Redguard down in Wayrest I. There's Bleak Veil Aggrandizers who are Redguard undead mummy necromancers part of the Black Veil, they were even in the other games as well. Hating necromancy isn't indicative of a race being able to use it or not, it just means the majority hates it. Also when confronting them with the evidence, they'd hurl more insults. Saying that I was 'too stupid to understand the lore' and that I should <insert edgy command here>. Yet anyone can go for a stroll in Alik'r, go to, again, King's Rest and fight Abal the Defiler, who is CLEARLY Redguard and part of the Withered Hand. I guess that world boss doesn't exist? I also went a step further and named a named NPC in both Skyrim and Oblivion that were in fact Redguard necromancers. They exist. Despite their claims, they really do. Which means either they didn't get to Alik'r, play the other games, or they haven't been paying attention. Or both.

kijima

If I'm prepared to tea bag you, then I'm also prepared to accept tells. =D

Grandchamp1989

Kurat wrote: »

I'm sure there are some trolls and toxic elitists out there who like to rage, insult just cause. But most people dont send you hate whispers if you're not [snip]. Leaving dungeons because you dont approve someone's build, gameplay or cp level, while run is going half decent, deserves to be called out.

By whsipering them to tell them you wish death on them?

I don't think so.

That is bullying and harrasment.

And in no way shape or form does anyone sign a contract, when they que for a dungeon, saying they can't leave the dungeon.
It's a game and if people got more important or better things to do than to stare at the same pixels over and over again, because there's no progression in a dungeon, that's certaintly within their right.

Even if there is progression.. Sometimes the phone will ring with an important call or the kids are at each other's throat.
Life happens outside of ESO dungeons.

I have had people leave dungeons where we made good progress aswell. Or VetDLC final boss, team wipe 1 time and people start to leave. It's annoying, yes! But it's their right to do so.

I swear it's like some people just want to hold you hostage with their bad dps and even worse attitude. (don't mean you specificly)

I say avoid people like that at all cost.

YandereGirlfriend

If someone is raging at you in personal terms then it says far more about the person doing the raging (and the condition of their life...) than it does about you.

I thankfully tend not to attract rage but the few times that it has happened I end up feeling more sorry for the sad state of the rager than anything else.

Nobody whose life is in a good place walks around with that much hate.

Grandchamp1989

Raideen wrote: »

Grandchamp1989 wrote: »

Kurat wrote: »

I'm sure there are some trolls and toxic elitists out there who like to rage, insult just cause. But most people dont send you hate whispers if you're not d!ck. Leaving dungeons because you dont approve someone's build, gameplay or cp level, while run is going half decent, deserves to be called out.

By whsipering them to tell them you wish death on them?

I don't think so.

That is bullying and harrasment.

And in no way shape or form does anyone sign a contract, when they que for a dungeon, saying they can't leave the dungeon.
It's a game and if people got more important or better things to do than to stare at the same pixels over and over again, because there's no progression in a dungeon, that's certaintly within their right.

Even if there is progression.. Sometimes the phone will ring with an important call or the kids are at each other's throat.
Life happens outside of ESO dungeons.

I have had people leave dungeons where we made good progress aswell. Or VetDLC final boss, team wipe 1 time and people start to leave. It's annoying, yes! But it's their right to do so.

I swear it's like some people just want to hold you hostage with their bad dps and even worse attitude. (don't mean you specificly)

I say avoid people like that at all cost.

[Quoted post was removed]

The OP literally wrote that he/she is leaving because the dungeon were "too much of a struggle."

You should never force someone to stay and clear something they don't believe in. That should be obvious for everyone, this isn't North Korea - it's ESO FFS. It's a game! You play to have fun, if you don't have fun with games... the whole point of doing them goes out the window, and you SHOULD do something else. If you stay in a game mode you don't enjoy anymore you'll be frustrated and toxic. The grown up thing is to leave before that happen.

If you hate whisper someone for doing something more productive with their own time, than forcing themselves to do a dungeon run they don't think will work, then...Honestly you got some serious insecurities, and you probably need professional help to deal with it.

Dusk_Coven

BuildMan wrote: »

Block, ignore, move on.

Apparently even that doesn't always work. https://forums.elderscrollsonline.com/en/discussion/549827/sexual-harrasment-player-is-back#latest

cheesefome

You know what annoys me the most out of all the cry babies that whisper me? The fact that they whisper you a bunch of crap about how you should have done this or you suck at that and then IMMEDIATELY afterwards mute you.

Like dude.... get it together.

If you're going to whisper someone to tell them how horrible and useless they are at least give me the opportunity to defend myself. Some people just can't handle criticism but they want to dish it out. My entire point is, people have become so weak minded compared to back when i was growing up around video games in the 2000's. No one ever blocked you, no one said " im going to report you for verbal abuse ". People just had a discussion or an argument about there disagreements and moved on. Every generation is becoming mentally weaker and unstable and lack the combability to soak a few insults here and there.

Don't get me wrong, there is a limit to this, sometimes people can take it a tad bit far(if that is the case I mute them) but as long as that isn't the case, a little argument with someone who you disagree with is not going to hurt you but in fact might make you more resilient to insults.

TL;DR - Newer generations are becoming less and less mentally resilient to insults and I don't think this is a good thing in the long run. Don't take insults over the internet seriously, remember that this person doesn't even know the real you. Agree to disagree and move on. This type of mentality should also be applied to the forum moderators cause often they remove posts. Filter the real "toxic" posts not every damn posts the triggers and argument between 2 humans expressing their own opinion.

Grandchamp1989

cheesefome wrote: »

You know what annoys me the most out of all the cry babies that whisper me? The fact that they whisper you a bunch of crap about how you should have done this or you suck at that and then IMMEDIATELY afterwards mute you.

Like dude.... get it together.

If you're going to whisper someone to tell them how horrible and useless they are at least give me the opportunity to defend myself. Some people just can't handle criticism but they want to dish it out. My entire point is, people have become so weak minded compared to back when i was growing up around video games in the 2000's. No one ever blocked you, no one said " im going to report you for verbal abuse ". People just had a discussion or an argument about there disagreements and moved on. Every generation is becoming mentally weaker and unstable and lack the combability to soak a few insults here and there.

Don't get me wrong, there is a limit to this, sometimes people can take it a tad bit far(if that is the case I mute them) but as long as that isn't the case, a little argument with someone who you disagree with is not going to hurt you but in fact might make you more resilient to insults.

TL;DR - Newer generations are becoming less and less mentally resilient to insults and I don't think this is a good thing in the long run. Don't take insults over the internet seriously, remember that this person doesn't even know the real you. Agree to disagree and move on. This type of mentality should also be applied to the forum moderators cause often they remove posts. Filter the real "toxic" posts not every damn posts the triggers and argument between 2 humans expressing their own opinion.

Yes the "I want the last word so I'll talk trash and run (mute)" shows a weak mind indeed.
You want to provoce but you don't want to deal with the consequences.

From around 2007 to 2015 I usually spend most my time on boxing forums. I love the sport and loved to discuss the sport with others. And yes fight fans can be passionate......

Even then it didn't come close to the absolutely disgusting and vile *** people will throw at you now day.

They'll wish the most horrible diseases on you
They'll say they hope your mother dies and your girlfriend gets *****

As a man you know there's a certain line when you speak to another man.. And if you cross that line.. you get punched in the face.

Here there's no line.. I remember playing overwatch with my girlfriend and a bunch of 12 year olds were screaming into their mic calling her a ***** the entire match.

I'm not saying to punch 12 year old bratz in the face... They're learning this behavior from somewhere, but even grown ass men talks like that. And it's for the simplest things.. The glass ego's some guys have today.. [snip].. You can't even have a different opinion than them before they shatter into a million pieces.

[edited for bypassing profanity filter]

kathandira

Chapilliams wrote: »

So, I was just doing the daily pledges - Vet Darkshade 2. I was running it on my healer, with a tank and 2 DD's. 1 dd with 810 cp and the other around 200-ish cp.
- The 200 CP already struggled with the first trash pull and died, cause he didn't have food on. Was telling him kindly to put some food on, cause he was running at around 11K.

I noticed rather quick that the dmg was low, I was running around 30% of the dmg with my healer - Having Hollow, olo and earthgore on. So when the 200-ish CP died again on the first boss I decided this wouldn't be worth the time. I then wrote in game I was leaving 'cause it would be too much of a struggle.
- Then the 200 cp decided hate whisper me telling me to get cancer.

Save to say I am shook about this. I was looking forward to having a nice chill sunday, playing some eso - but having lost family memebers to this awful disease, that cancer is. I am now instead forced to put energy into not letting this ruin my entire day and not letting a knob like that win.
- But this is just, yet another reminder of why I cannot stand doing anything group related in game (unless it's a premade group). The fun is taken out of it when you have to hear people either wishing the worst for you or someone on your team, because they have problems with themselves and their toxicity.

I know it's almost daily you see this, either in dungeons or in zone chats.
What goes on in peoples mind to feel like they can go around saying *** like this to others?
It's just a game - isn't this supposed to be a community where you can expand and have a fun chat with others? Get to know people ect.


I would love to see the consequences for people acting this way much bigger than they are.

Can't we all just be nice to one another instead of this?

You don't know peoples stories, you don't know what they are dealing with - so with kindness you come a long way.

It has been a VERY long time since I received any offensive, or negative messages in a video game. I do not PvP, so there is that. And in PvE, I try to be a nice person. I've made many more friends than enemies via Random Dungeons.

cheesefome

Grandchamp1989 wrote: »

cheesefome wrote: »

You know what annoys me the most out of all the cry babies that whisper me? The fact that they whisper you a bunch of crap about how you should have done this or you suck at that and then IMMEDIATELY afterwards mute you.

Like dude.... get it together.

If you're going to whisper someone to tell them how horrible and useless they are at least give me the opportunity to defend myself. Some people just can't handle criticism but they want to dish it out. My entire point is, people have become so weak minded compared to back when i was growing up around video games in the 2000's. No one ever blocked you, no one said " im going to report you for verbal abuse ". People just had a discussion or an argument about there disagreements and moved on. Every generation is becoming mentally weaker and unstable and lack the combability to soak a few insults here and there.

Don't get me wrong, there is a limit to this, sometimes people can take it a tad bit far(if that is the case I mute them) but as long as that isn't the case, a little argument with someone who you disagree with is not going to hurt you but in fact might make you more resilient to insults.

TL;DR - Newer generations are becoming less and less mentally resilient to insults and I don't think this is a good thing in the long run. Don't take insults over the internet seriously, remember that this person doesn't even know the real you. Agree to disagree and move on. This type of mentality should also be applied to the forum moderators cause often they remove posts. Filter the real "toxic" posts not every damn posts the triggers and argument between 2 humans expressing their own opinion.

Yes the "I want the last word so I'll talk trash and run (mute)" shows a weak mind indeed.
You want to provoce but you don't want to deal with the consequences.

From around 2007 to 2015 I usually spend most my time on boxing forums. I love the sport and loved to discuss the sport with others. And yes fight fans can be passionate......

Even then it didn't come close to the absolutely disgusting and vile *** people will throw at you now day.

They'll wish the most horrible diseases on you
They'll say they hope your mother dies and your girlfriend gets *****

As a man you know there's a certain line when you speak to another man.. And if you cross that line.. you get punched in the face.

Here there's no line.. I remember playing overwatch with my girlfriend and a bunch of 12 year olds were screaming into their mic calling her a ***** the entire match.

I'm not saying to punch 12 year old bratz in the face... They're learning this behavior from somewhere, but even grown ass men talks like that. And it's for the simplest things.. The glass ego's some guys have today.. Holyshit.. You can't even have a different opinion than them before they shatter into a million pieces.

#FACTS

Shocks me how easily people's ego's can be damaged. Honestly that is pretty much the sum all that i said. Well said sir.

Fragile ego's.

cheesefome

kathandira wrote: »

Chapilliams wrote: »

So, I was just doing the daily pledges - Vet Darkshade 2. I was running it on my healer, with a tank and 2 DD's. 1 dd with 810 cp and the other around 200-ish cp.
- The 200 CP already struggled with the first trash pull and died, cause he didn't have food on. Was telling him kindly to put some food on, cause he was running at around 11K.

I noticed rather quick that the dmg was low, I was running around 30% of the dmg with my healer - Having Hollow, olo and earthgore on. So when the 200-ish CP died again on the first boss I decided this wouldn't be worth the time. I then wrote in game I was leaving 'cause it would be too much of a struggle.
- Then the 200 cp decided hate whisper me telling me to get cancer.

Save to say I am shook about this. I was looking forward to having a nice chill sunday, playing some eso - but having lost family memebers to this awful disease, that cancer is. I am now instead forced to put energy into not letting this ruin my entire day and not letting a knob like that win.
- But this is just, yet another reminder of why I cannot stand doing anything group related in game (unless it's a premade group). The fun is taken out of it when you have to hear people either wishing the worst for you or someone on your team, because they have problems with themselves and their toxicity.

I know it's almost daily you see this, either in dungeons or in zone chats.
What goes on in peoples mind to feel like they can go around saying *** like this to others?
It's just a game - isn't this supposed to be a community where you can expand and have a fun chat with others? Get to know people ect.


I would love to see the consequences for people acting this way much bigger than they are.

Can't we all just be nice to one another instead of this?

You don't know peoples stories, you don't know what they are dealing with - so with kindness you come a long way.

It has been a VERY long time since I received any offensive, or negative messages in a video game. I do not PvP, so there is that. And in PvE, I try to be a nice person. I've made many more friends than enemies via Random Dungeons.

It's mostly the PvP community. I don't think ive ever had an argument with someone over a dungeon. Ive had more arguments against people in open world and that is mostly about the ratio of crowns and what we think is the appropriate standard of the cost of crowns or about the performance issues of ESO. Not exactly "toxic.

JessPushToPlay

Sorry that person ruined your day! Definitely would leave a sour taste in my mouth, too. Report it- it's up to all of us to not be complacent when there's bullies and toxicity going on in game.

We' re here for the fun & community & sadly, a small few can ruin it for all of us.

Sephyr

Grandchamp1989 wrote: »

Raideen wrote: »

Grandchamp1989 wrote: »

Kurat wrote: »

I'm sure there are some trolls and toxic elitists out there who like to rage, insult just cause. But most people dont send you hate whispers if you're not d!ck. Leaving dungeons because you dont approve someone's build, gameplay or cp level, while run is going half decent, deserves to be called out.

By whsipering them to tell them you wish death on them?

I don't think so.

That is bullying and harrasment.

And in no way shape or form does anyone sign a contract, when they que for a dungeon, saying they can't leave the dungeon.
It's a game and if people got more important or better things to do than to stare at the same pixels over and over again, because there's no progression in a dungeon, that's certaintly within their right.

Even if there is progression.. Sometimes the phone will ring with an important call or the kids are at each other's throat.
Life happens outside of ESO dungeons.

I have had people leave dungeons where we made good progress aswell. Or VetDLC final boss, team wipe 1 time and people start to leave. It's annoying, yes! But it's their right to do so.

I swear it's like some people just want to hold you hostage with their bad dps and even worse attitude. (don't mean you specificly)

I say avoid people like that at all cost.

[Quoted post was removed]

The OP literally wrote that he/she is leaving because the dungeon were "too much of a struggle."

You should never force someone to stay and clear something they don't believe in. That should be obvious for everyone, this isn't North Korea - it's ESO FFS. It's a game! You play to have fun, if you don't have fun with games... the whole point of doing them goes out the window, and you SHOULD do something else. If you stay in a game mode you don't enjoy anymore you'll be frustrated and toxic. The grown up thing is to leave before that happen.

If you hate whisper someone for doing something more productive with their own time, than forcing themselves to do a dungeon run they don't think will work, then...Honestly you got some serious insecurities, and you probably need professional help to deal with it.

Precisely. No one deserves any form of toxicity thrown at them, period. I may get heated, I may get upset, but I don't go into someone's whispers wishing them death. People who encourage or say that they 'deserved' it are displaying the same toxicity as people who send hate whispers or the people they call 'elitists'. Yikes.

zaria

Kurat wrote: »

I'm sure there are some trolls and toxic elitists out there who like to rage, insult just cause. But most people dont send you hate whispers if you're not [snip]. Leaving dungeons because you dont approve someone's build, gameplay or cp level, while run is going half decent, deserves to be called out.

[Edited to remove Profanity]

That guy was not an toxic elitist, yes they exist but is mostly the sort who run ahead without warning leaving the group to deal with the trash, skip in FG or CoA2 and leave group behind, rather than being smart ask group to grap his tail and hold on, pull all trash up to an corner before the boss and burn it, burn boss and repeat.
Probably faster, you are an hero not an asshatt and then asking for gear group will happily give it rather than you run an risk of an kick.

The guy OP ran into was an spoiled kid and an noob and he will stay an noob as he will not work in guild runs.
And reporting is the right thing to do, even if nothing happens first time an long list of reports on you is unhealthy.

Chapilliams

Raideen wrote: »

Grandchamp1989 wrote: »

Kurat wrote: »

I'm sure there are some trolls and toxic elitists out there who like to rage, insult just cause. But most people dont send you hate whispers if you're not d!ck. Leaving dungeons because you dont approve someone's build, gameplay or cp level, while run is going half decent, deserves to be called out.

By whsipering them to tell them you wish death on them?

I don't think so.

That is bullying and harrasment.

And in no way shape or form does anyone sign a contract, when they que for a dungeon, saying they can't leave the dungeon.
It's a game and if people got more important or better things to do than to stare at the same pixels over and over again, because there's no progression in a dungeon, that's certaintly within their right.

Even if there is progression.. Sometimes the phone will ring with an important call or the kids are at each other's throat.
Life happens outside of ESO dungeons.

I have had people leave dungeons where we made good progress aswell. Or VetDLC final boss, team wipe 1 time and people start to leave. It's annoying, yes! But it's their right to do so.

I swear it's like some people just want to hold you hostage with their bad dps and even worse attitude. (don't mean you specificly)

I say avoid people like that at all cost.

[Quoted post was removed]

So if you leave a dungeon you won't have a problem having people whisper you, wishing awful things on you and you think it's well deserved to act that way?
- I didn't leave the dungeon to be a *** and nor did I say anything in the dungeon that would justify a whisper like that. Everyone has the right to leave a dungeon, especially if it isn't going anywhere, which was the case here. And yes, it was one boss but if you play enough dungeons you KNOW from the first trash pull wether or not this will be something you, as a team, can get through. Even the tank in my team left - which I probably should have stated, yes but didn't - cause this was about the whisper and peoples attitudes.
- I'm not trying to come off as an elitist or anything. I'm simply stating that there is a problem in our community and if you wholeheartedly think it's okay to whisper people things like that, sorry to say - but then you are a part of the problem.

SpiritofESO