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Best thief loot: funny, valuable, rare finds

tinythinker
tinythinker
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Share. :smile:

tumblr_static_tumblr_static_3fed0s68zem8oockscsoskok8_640.jpg
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Support Mudcrab Mode for ESO (\/)!_!(\/) - part joke, part serious, all glorious! You butter be ready for this
  • VaranisArano
    VaranisArano
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    Tamriel's equivalent of Calvinball:
    item-74581-1-1.png

    The most valuable item I've found:
    item-61094-1-4.png

    An item that is sadly not in the game:
    item-79583-1-3.png

    But nothing really compares to walking up to a Theives Guild Fence and handing them a bunch of chamber pots.
    item-62906-1-1.png
  • tinythinker
    tinythinker
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    I will have to find a lot of the funny ones again as I didn't get a shot of them, but this turned up earlier today:

    imperial%2Bcity%2Bmotif%2Bloot.png

    May not be as valuable as at launch (not sure?) but I needed it so... :tongue:
    Experienced, new, returner? Help keep ESO's community strong ᕙ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ᕗ -- share what you love about the game, offer constructive feedback, and make friends.ʕ·ᴥ·ʔ

    . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

    Who are you in Tamriel (whether it's just your character's attitude & style or a full backstory)? - Share your Character's Story! ◔ ⌣ ◔
    (And let us know 🔷What Kind of Roleplayer You Are🔷 - even if that only extends to choosing your race)


    . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

    Support Mudcrab Mode for ESO (\/)!_!(\/) - part joke, part serious, all glorious! You butter be ready for this
  • Dapper Dinosaur
    Dapper Dinosaur
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    There is an item that (not able to copy it word for word here) was a gnarly bent cane that was actually a bull...tube.

    I'm not kidding. I got a packet of 10 of them for a heist. It said it's blah blah blah a bull member.

    EDIT: Ah, there it is.
    item-64382-1-1.png
    Edited by Dapper Dinosaur on January 7, 2018 6:50PM
  • VaranisArano
    VaranisArano
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    Anyone looking for the stolen item images to link here can use the lists here: http://en.uesp.net/wiki/Online:Contraband

    Just use the "Link to Item Image" option to get the link so you can have the item show up here.
  • Runs
    Runs
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    itemLinkImage.php?itemid=73820&summary&none=item.png
    Runs| Orc NightbladeChim-el Adabal| Dunmer TemplarM'air the Honest| Khajiit Templar
    Oddity| Altmer SorcerorDrizlo| Orc DragonKnightLady Ra Gada| Redguard Sorceror
    Taste-of-Hist-Sap| Argonian NightbladeWar'den Peace| Khajiit WardenLittle Warden Annie Altmer Warden
    Ports with Blood| Breton TemplarDirty-Old-Man| Dunmer DragonKnightEyes-of-the-Sun| Argonian DragonKnight
    Bleak Mystique| Nord WardenPolychronopolous| Imperial SorcerorBullcrit| Khajiit Nightblade
    PC NA CP 1250+ and still a noob
    At Writs End - A place to complete master writs
  • tinythinker
    tinythinker
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    Experienced, new, returner? Help keep ESO's community strong ᕙ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ᕗ -- share what you love about the game, offer constructive feedback, and make friends.ʕ·ᴥ·ʔ

    . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

    Who are you in Tamriel (whether it's just your character's attitude & style or a full backstory)? - Share your Character's Story! ◔ ⌣ ◔
    (And let us know 🔷What Kind of Roleplayer You Are🔷 - even if that only extends to choosing your race)


    . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

    Support Mudcrab Mode for ESO (\/)!_!(\/) - part joke, part serious, all glorious! You butter be ready for this
  • driosketch
    driosketch
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    But nothing really compares to walking up to a Theives Guild Fence and handing them a bunch of chamber pots.
    item-62906-1-1.png

    I had the following conversation, praphrased, about the PCP the other day in one of my guilds. It went like this:

    "Aren't all chamber pots portable? Isn't that the point in how they work, so you can empty them."

    I think they mean portable as in traveling with it.

    "That doesn't make sense. Inns and homes would have their own, and in between you could use a tree."

    It's in the description, when you're too good for a tree or something.

    "But then you still need to empty it on a tree or something. Doesn't it just create extra steps?"

    I assume it creates extra steps for Stibbons, or whoever has to empty it instead.

    "Okay that makes sense."

    ...or, it's meant to sound impractical, which is the joke with many things you can steal.

    "No don't say that. It finally made sense to me as something invented just to inconvenience Stibbons."


    And so we agreed to this new explanation as making the most sense.
    Main: Drio Azul ~ DC, Redguard, Healer/Magicka Templar ~ NA-PC
    ●The Psijic Order●The Sidekick Order●Great House Hlaalu●Bal-Busters●
  • RaddlemanNumber7
    RaddlemanNumber7
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    YgTX9Sr.jpg
    PC EU
  • skywarnmc27
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    kitten2_zpscupvgblu.jpg

  • Prof_Bawbag
    Prof_Bawbag
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    I will have to find a lot of the funny ones again as I didn't get a shot of them, but this turned up earlier today:

    imperial%2Bcity%2Bmotif%2Bloot.png

    May not be as valuable as at launch (not sure?) but I needed it so... :tongue:

    I don'r screenshot those finds in case a crash happens. It gets ripped from the container asap. I found a cipher and was gonna SS it, but would have been too scared that the game would have crash or something.
  • tinythinker
    tinythinker
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    I will have to find a lot of the funny ones again as I didn't get a shot of them, but this turned up earlier today:

    imperial%2Bcity%2Bmotif%2Bloot.png

    May not be as valuable as at launch (not sure?) but I needed it so... :tongue:

    I don'r screenshot those finds in case a crash happens. It gets ripped from the container asap. I found a cipher and was gonna SS it, but would have been too scared that the game would have crash or something.

    It's also an area that's heavily thieved so another player could have popped in and grabbed it!
    Experienced, new, returner? Help keep ESO's community strong ᕙ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ᕗ -- share what you love about the game, offer constructive feedback, and make friends.ʕ·ᴥ·ʔ

    . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

    Who are you in Tamriel (whether it's just your character's attitude & style or a full backstory)? - Share your Character's Story! ◔ ⌣ ◔
    (And let us know 🔷What Kind of Roleplayer You Are🔷 - even if that only extends to choosing your race)


    . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

    Support Mudcrab Mode for ESO (\/)!_!(\/) - part joke, part serious, all glorious! You butter be ready for this
  • Aliyavana
    Aliyavana
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    I will have to find a lot of the funny ones again as I didn't get a shot of them, but this turned up earlier today:

    imperial%2Bcity%2Bmotif%2Bloot.png

    May not be as valuable as at launch (not sure?) but I needed it so... :tongue:

    I don'r screenshot those finds in case a crash happens. It gets ripped from the container asap. I found a cipher and was gonna SS it, but would have been too scared that the game would have crash or something.

    It's also an area that's heavily thieved so another player could have popped in and grabbed it!

    Only containers that are shared are lockpoxes and chests
  • tinythinker
    tinythinker
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    aliyavana wrote: »
    I will have to find a lot of the funny ones again as I didn't get a shot of them, but this turned up earlier today:

    imperial%2Bcity%2Bmotif%2Bloot.png

    May not be as valuable as at launch (not sure?) but I needed it so... :tongue:

    I don'r screenshot those finds in case a crash happens. It gets ripped from the container asap. I found a cipher and was gonna SS it, but would have been too scared that the game would have crash or something.

    It's also an area that's heavily thieved so another player could have popped in and grabbed it!

    Only containers that are shared are lockpoxes and chests

    Good to know :)
    Experienced, new, returner? Help keep ESO's community strong ᕙ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ᕗ -- share what you love about the game, offer constructive feedback, and make friends.ʕ·ᴥ·ʔ

    . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

    Who are you in Tamriel (whether it's just your character's attitude & style or a full backstory)? - Share your Character's Story! ◔ ⌣ ◔
    (And let us know 🔷What Kind of Roleplayer You Are🔷 - even if that only extends to choosing your race)


    . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

    Support Mudcrab Mode for ESO (\/)!_!(\/) - part joke, part serious, all glorious! You butter be ready for this
  • FrancisCrawford
    FrancisCrawford
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    I will have to find a lot of the funny ones again as I didn't get a shot of them, but this turned up earlier today:

    imperial%2Bcity%2Bmotif%2Bloot.png

    May not be as valuable as at launch (not sure?) but I needed it so... :tongue:

    What add-on gives you the "Known by/Can be researched by" info?
  • FrancisCrawford
    FrancisCrawford
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    There is an item that (not able to copy it word for word here) was a gnarly bent cane that was actually a bull...tube.

    I'm not kidding. I got a packet of 10 of them for a heist. It said it's blah blah blah a bull member.

    That's quite a load of bull!
  • tinythinker
    tinythinker
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    I will have to find a lot of the funny ones again as I didn't get a shot of them, but this turned up earlier today:

    imperial%2Bcity%2Bmotif%2Bloot.png

    May not be as valuable as at launch (not sure?) but I needed it so... :tongue:

    What add-on gives you the "Known by/Can be researched by" info?

    Trait Buddy
    Edited by tinythinker on January 7, 2018 9:02PM
    Experienced, new, returner? Help keep ESO's community strong ᕙ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ᕗ -- share what you love about the game, offer constructive feedback, and make friends.ʕ·ᴥ·ʔ

    . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

    Who are you in Tamriel (whether it's just your character's attitude & style or a full backstory)? - Share your Character's Story! ◔ ⌣ ◔
    (And let us know 🔷What Kind of Roleplayer You Are🔷 - even if that only extends to choosing your race)


    . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

    Support Mudcrab Mode for ESO (\/)!_!(\/) - part joke, part serious, all glorious! You butter be ready for this
  • XDragonDoomX
    XDragonDoomX
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    Don't have a s/shot atm - but one of the good ones is 'Kawala Tea of Marcy' - and the description is along the lines that it comes in its own container and isn't strained.....

    And if that doesn't ring any bells... check below

    Then go look at 'The Merchant of Venice' (Wililam Shakespeare)
    "The quality of mercy is not strained. It droppeth as the gentle rain from heaven"

    Edited by XDragonDoomX on January 7, 2018 9:06PM
    "Forums are like a herd of performing elephants with diarrhea.
    massive, difficult to redirect, awe-inspiring, entertaining, and a source of
    mind-boggling amounts of excrement when you least expect it. ”

    (with apologies to Eugene H. Spafford, aka Spaf)

    I have the power to please one person per day. Today is not your day.
    Tomorrow... Tomorrow does not look good either.

    82. Victory laps after killing the dragon with my 1d2 bow is considered in poor taste.
    83. My gnome does not like big butts and he cannot lie.
    84. Not allowed to talk my fellow inquisitors into buying a 220lb pull crossbow.
    85. Not allowed to talk my fellow inquisitors into buying an industrial strength flamethrower.
    86. Not allowed to make a superhero with a 99% chance of dodging even after the -10 penalty for a successful called shot.
    87. There is no such thing as a dwarven katana.
    88. My bard does not get a bonus to perform if she is obviously not wearing anything under her tabard.
    89. The elf's name is not Legolam.
    ** Mr Glenn's Forbidden activities list**

  • VaranisArano
    VaranisArano
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    kitten2_zpscupvgblu.jpg

    For when you absolutely, positively, want to traumatize zone chat :smiley:
  • Huyen
    Huyen
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    Tamriel's equivalent of Calvinball:
    item-74581-1-1.png

    The most valuable item I've found:
    item-61094-1-4.png

    An item that is sadly not in the game:
    item-79583-1-3.png

    But nothing really compares to walking up to a Theives Guild Fence and handing them a bunch of chamber pots.
    item-62906-1-1.png

    This one does not agree with the book on kicking Khajiits in Tamriel. This one believes kicking a Khajiit is wrong, and this one will respond with Whispering Fangs if one should try to kick Huyen!
    Huyen Shadowpaw, dedicated nightblade tank - PS4 (Retired)
    Huyen Swiftpaw, nightblade dps - PC EU (Retired)
    Huyen Lightpaw, templar healer - PC EU (Retired)
    Huyen Swiftpaw, necromancer dps - PC EU (Retired)
    Huyen Swiftpaw, dragonknight (no defined role yet)

    "Failure is only the opportunity to begin again. Only this time, more wisely" - Uncle Iroh
  • WhiteCoatSyndrome
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    Not mine, but someone linked this in chat the other day:

    item-63259-1-2.png

    Why is it under 'Medical Supplies'? :|
    #proud2BAStarObsessedLoony
    PAWS (Positively Against Wrip-off Stuff) - Say No to Crown Crates!
    A useful explanation for how RNG works
    How to turn off the sustainability features (screen dimming, fps cap) on PC
    Merry Christmas and happy New Life!
  • VaranisArano
    VaranisArano
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    Huyen wrote: »
    This one does not agree with the book on kicking Khajiits in Tamriel. This one believes kicking a Khajiit is wrong, and this one will respond with Whispering Fangs if one should try to kick Huyen!

    Whispering Fang sounds like exactly the right response to that game! :smiley:
  • zaria
    zaria
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    Not mine, but someone linked this in chat the other day:

    item-63259-1-2.png

    Why is it under 'Medical Supplies'? :|
    Multiple bdsm items you can find, guildmate listed 5 once some asked for gear advice :)
    they should be wearable as an 5 piece set

    My favorite is the looted clothes.
    7gD2fqGh.jpg
    As shame they can not be used for outfits as they would be awesome.
    Grinding just make you go in circles.
    Asking ZoS for nerfs is as stupid as asking for close air support from the death star.
  • skywarnmc27
    skywarnmc27
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    kitten2_zpscupvgblu.jpg

    Thesis project.
  • skywarnmc27
    skywarnmc27
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    kitten2_zpscupvgblu.jpg

    For when you absolutely, positively, want to traumatize zone chat :smiley:

    I do it a lot, seems photobucket is now blocking it.
    Edited by skywarnmc27 on January 8, 2018 2:55PM
  • tinythinker
    tinythinker
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    kitten2_zpscupvgblu.jpg

    For when you absolutely, positively, want to traumatize zone chat :smiley:

    I do it a lot, seems photobucket is now blocking it.

    Argggggghhhh. So frustrating, eh?
    Experienced, new, returner? Help keep ESO's community strong ᕙ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ᕗ -- share what you love about the game, offer constructive feedback, and make friends.ʕ·ᴥ·ʔ

    . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

    Who are you in Tamriel (whether it's just your character's attitude & style or a full backstory)? - Share your Character's Story! ◔ ⌣ ◔
    (And let us know 🔷What Kind of Roleplayer You Are🔷 - even if that only extends to choosing your race)


    . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

    Support Mudcrab Mode for ESO (\/)!_!(\/) - part joke, part serious, all glorious! You butter be ready for this
  • Radinyn
    Radinyn
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    I will have to find a lot of the funny ones again as I didn't get a shot of them, but this turned up earlier today:

    imperial%2Bcity%2Bmotif%2Bloot.png

    May not be as valuable as at launch (not sure?) but I needed it so... :tongue:

    at launch it was blue and worth 200 gold
  • Feric51
    Feric51
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    Tamriel's equivalent of Calvinball:
    item-74581-1-1.png

    Wish I could give you more "awesomes" for the Calvin and Hobbes reference.
    Feric51
    Xbox NA

    Darkness Falls: The Crusade survivor (you young kids will never know the struggle of text-based games)


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