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RIP Pacrooti

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wayfarerx
wayfarerx
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Way back in 2014 when I was just a noob and vamp pyromage DKs ruled the world, one of my very favorite things in ESO was Pacrooti. This friendly Khajiit would send me mail every day chronicling his exploits in Tamriel. His wit and clever dialogue were a delight, the first thing I would do after logging in each day would be to scour my mail for the latest tale of misadventure from my favorite feline friend.

Apparently the woodworking trade in Tamriel has not been a growth industry, because dark times have fallen upon our erstwhile lumberjack. Instead of scouring the forests of Nirn for the choicest woodworking materials he now lurks in the dark alleys and dank sewers of our cities peddling the Tamrielic version of meth. "Just one more" he pleads with us, speaking to the vapid and hollow impulses we all share. He's become ESO's Walter White except without the misplaced sense of honor or the obstinately noble goals. He's become nothing more than a dirty street-corner pusher seeking to separate fools from their money while feeding us drivel about our "perseverance."

The gambling boxes are terrible ZOS, many of your customers seem to agree on that. We know we can't stop this pending dumpster fire, but PLEASE LEAVE PACROOTI OUT OF THIS! Do not take one of the most universally loved characters in your game and turn him into this reprehensible scam artist. Keep the NPC, the model, most of the voice overs, whatever. Just take the name "Pacrooti" off everything associated with the Crown Crates and put him in the game somewhere that's actually fun. PLEASE.

#SavePacrooti
Edited by wayfarerx on September 20, 2016 8:01PM
@wayfarerx - PC / North America / Aldmeri Dominion
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  • raidentenshu_ESO
    raidentenshu_ESO
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    Who the heck is Parcooti?
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  • Phinix1
    Phinix1
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    /signed
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  • Abeille
    Abeille
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    raidentenshu_ESO wrote: »
    Who the heck is Parcooti?

    Woodworking hireling that sends some amusing letters.
    Just so that everyone knows, my Altmer still can't have black hair. About a dozen of Altmer NPCs in the game have black hair. Just saying.

    Meet my characters:
    Command: Do the thing.

    Zadarri, Khajiit Fist of Thalmor: The thing was done, as commanded.
    Durza gra-Maghul, Orc blacksmith: The thing was done perfectly, in the most efficient way.
    Tegwen, Bosmer troublemaker: You can't prove I didn't do the thing.
    Sings-Many-Songs, Argonian fisher: Sure, I'll do the thing... Eventually. Maybe.
    Aerindel, Altmer stormcaller: After extensive research, I've come to the conclusion that doing the thing would be a waste of resources.
    Liliel, Dunmer pyromancer: Aerindel said I shouldn't do the thing. Something about "resources".
    Gyda Snowcaller, Nord cryomancer: I will find a way to do it that won't waste resources and make Aerindel proud of me.
    Beatrice Leoriane, Breton vampire: I persuaded someone else into doing the thing. You are welcome, dear.
    Sahima, Redguard performer: Doing the thing sounds awfully unpleasant and really not my problem.
    Ellaria Valerius, Imperial priestess: I'll pray to the Eight for the thing to be done, if it is Their will.
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  • wayfarerx
    wayfarerx
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    raidentenshu_ESO wrote: »
    Who the heck is Parcooti?

    I fixed it LOL. Desperation does not enhance my already limited spelling abilities ;)
    @wayfarerx - PC / North America / Aldmeri Dominion
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  • MasterSpatula
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    Wow, talk about adding insult to insult.
    "A probable impossibility is preferable to an improbable possibility." - Aristotle
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  • Waffennacht
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    He disappeared or stopped sending me mail over a year ago.

    What is this about him and the boxes?
    Gamer tag: ShenronNacht NA Xbox One
    1100+ CP
    Battleground PvP'er
    Destroyer Immortal Health Sorcerer
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  • raidentenshu_ESO
    raidentenshu_ESO
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    Abeille wrote: »
    raidentenshu_ESO wrote: »
    Who the heck is Parcooti?

    Woodworking hireling that sends some amusing letters.

    I don't care too much about what hireling sends for as long as they send me good items, and so far the woodworking hiring hasn't send me anything good so this Parcooti character needs to be nerfed.
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  • WhiteCoatSyndrome
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    raidentenshu_ESO wrote: »
    Who the heck is Parcooti?

    Hireling who sends you materials. You get about a month's worth of notes from him with the right passive unlocked. He also did an Answers Your Questions segment (I still miss those).

    I would however like to point out that this is not new information; they mentioned Pacrooti would be doing this when they announced the Crown Crates initially.
    #proud2BAStarObsessedLoony
    PAWS (Positively Against Wrip-off Stuff) - Say No to Crown Crates!
    A useful explanation for how RNG works
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  • arasysb14_ESO
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    Hey at least they didn't choose bunch of female npcs with belly dancer costumes and casino music played by a lute; that's the only way they could make it worse.

    Oh wait,err.. I shouldn't be giving any ideas ZOS since they are already good at making horrible decisions.
    Edited by arasysb14_ESO on September 20, 2016 8:12PM
    Arasys Llanor, CP 800+ Magicka Sorcerer NA

    Please do not use the same Fallout 76 engine for TES VI
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  • raidentenshu_ESO
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    WhiteCoatSyndrome wrote: »
    raidentenshu_ESO wrote: »
    Who the heck is Parcooti?

    Hireling who sends you materials. You get about a month's worth of notes from him with the right passive unlocked. He also did an Answers Your Questions segment (I still miss those).

    I would however like to point out that this is not new information; they mentioned Pacrooti would be doing this when they announced the Crown Crates initially.

    Ahhhh. I must admit that I don't read I just collect the items that I get in my mail :grin:
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  • Recremen
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    MissBizz wrote: »
    For those that are wondering who Pacrooti is. You can read all his notes to you here.

    What I found interesting... this is the first ever mail Pacrooti sends you. (Bolding done by me)
    This one is forwarding crafting materials to you. Pacrooti looks forward to a long and rewarding relationship with his honored friend, especially since the crooked dealers at the gambling caravan tricked him out of his hard-earned gold. Pacrooti will keep trying until he wins it back. That will teach them.

    It's like everyone knows that this is bad but they still go forward with it like they're possessed by a sinister, outside force.
    Men'Do PC NA AD Khajiit
    Grand High Illustrious Mid-Tier PvP/PvE Bussmunster
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  • driosketch
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    Wait, that's actually Pacrooti? I'm on my phone so I thought the comments were joking.
    Main: Drio Azul ~ DC, Redguard, Healer/Magicka Templar ~ NA-PC
    ●The Psijic Order●The Sidekick Order●Great House Hlaalu●Bal-Busters●
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  • phreatophile
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    Crowns, man. Corrupting our precious memories.
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  • WhiteCoatSyndrome
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    driosketch wrote: »
    Wait, that's actually Pacrooti? I'm on my phone so I thought the comments were joking.

    Negative on the joking. Completely dead serious unfortunately.

    #proud2BAStarObsessedLoony
    PAWS (Positively Against Wrip-off Stuff) - Say No to Crown Crates!
    A useful explanation for how RNG works
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  • MasterSpatula
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    raidentenshu_ESO wrote: »
    WhiteCoatSyndrome wrote: »
    raidentenshu_ESO wrote: »
    Who the heck is Parcooti?

    Hireling who sends you materials. You get about a month's worth of notes from him with the right passive unlocked. He also did an Answers Your Questions segment (I still miss those).

    I would however like to point out that this is not new information; they mentioned Pacrooti would be doing this when they announced the Crown Crates initially.

    Ahhhh. I must admit that I don't read I just collect the items that I get in my mail :grin:

    You're missing out.
    "A probable impossibility is preferable to an improbable possibility." - Aristotle
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  • Caligamy_ESO
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    raidentenshu_ESO wrote: »
    Who the heck is Parcooti?
    Pacrooti wrote:
    This one bought a horse that answers to commands. To make it stop, you shout "Sweet roll!" To make it go, you shout "Thank the Divines!" Pacrooti was riding and dozed off. When he awoke, the horse was racing towards a cliff. Pacrooti shouted "Sweet roll!" and it stopped just in time. "Whew," Pacrooti said, "Thank the Divines!" Pacrooti had horsemeat for dinner.
    "When you're in an Elder Scrolls game, you're in a world. We don't want players to hit monetization fees when they're in the world. It's like, I go into a dungeon, if I don't have access to the dungeon it pops up a window: you don't have access to this, go buy 50 credits. We didn't want that experience. That's not an Elder Scrolls experience." - Matt Firor
    My not so Flawless vMA videos: Click Here
    Rats of Tobruk ∙ The Soul Cairn ∙ Akir Gorapples Trading Co
    How the world ends
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  • Yolokin_Swagonborn
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    Pacrooti is falling on hard times. The hireling business just wasn't paying the bills to afford him the lifestyle he desired.

    Pacrooti knows gambling is a shady business but Kahjiit has RNG if you have coin.
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  • JamilaRaj
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    clayandaudrey_ESO wrote: »
    It should be @ZOS_MattFiror selling these wretched things in game.

    It has to be a cute, likeable character, whose cuteness and likeability would conceal the smell of scam. In other words, someone who you would look at and open your heart and wallet, which Matt Firor is not. [snip]

    [edited to remove flame]
    Edited by ZOS_CoriJ on September 20, 2016 11:47PM
    Offline.
    Do not click. You have been warned.
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  • SolarCat02
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    JamilaRaj wrote: »
    clayandaudrey_ESO wrote: »
    It should be @ZOS_MattFiror selling these wretched things in game.

    It has to be a cute, likeable character, whose cuteness and likeability would conceal the smell of scam. In other words, someone who you would look at and open your heart and wallet, which Matt Firor is not; you would look at him and only have to check your wallet is still in place.

    I don't know about you, but from Pacrooti's component gathering methods, I would not really say that I would not suspect him of a scam.
    Just not an organized one. His are more crimes of opportunity, so this does not really fit his character.
    Why be normal when you can be better?

    Elissandra Ravenwing, Magicka Dragonknight Healer
    Lady Kalila, Stamina Templar DPS
    Stands-in-Danger, Nightblade Saptank
    Zalarah, Stamina Dragonknight DPS
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  • Luigi_Vampa
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    I know this could very well get me ostracized from the community, but I never liked Pacrooti. Or Razum Dar for that matter.
    PC/EU DC
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  • Abeille
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    Typhoios wrote: »
    I know this could very well get me ostracized from the community, but I never liked Pacrooti. Or Razum Dar for that matter.

    shocked.gif

    Kidding, it's okay. It happens, not everybody likes the same characters.

    I bet a lot of people don't even remember Talviah, your Altmer buddy in Orsinium. I absolutely love him, he is a sweet cinnamon roll too good for this world, too pure. And still, lots of people killed him.
    Just so that everyone knows, my Altmer still can't have black hair. About a dozen of Altmer NPCs in the game have black hair. Just saying.

    Meet my characters:
    Command: Do the thing.

    Zadarri, Khajiit Fist of Thalmor: The thing was done, as commanded.
    Durza gra-Maghul, Orc blacksmith: The thing was done perfectly, in the most efficient way.
    Tegwen, Bosmer troublemaker: You can't prove I didn't do the thing.
    Sings-Many-Songs, Argonian fisher: Sure, I'll do the thing... Eventually. Maybe.
    Aerindel, Altmer stormcaller: After extensive research, I've come to the conclusion that doing the thing would be a waste of resources.
    Liliel, Dunmer pyromancer: Aerindel said I shouldn't do the thing. Something about "resources".
    Gyda Snowcaller, Nord cryomancer: I will find a way to do it that won't waste resources and make Aerindel proud of me.
    Beatrice Leoriane, Breton vampire: I persuaded someone else into doing the thing. You are welcome, dear.
    Sahima, Redguard performer: Doing the thing sounds awfully unpleasant and really not my problem.
    Ellaria Valerius, Imperial priestess: I'll pray to the Eight for the thing to be done, if it is Their will.
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