LGBT+ guilds

Kojran

I know this has been asked (countless times) but the threads seem old and or the guilds not around or the mail doesnt recognise the player when i try to send them an ingame email. What LGBT+ guilds are there? I am on PC, using the EU server but playing from Australia

Kojran

if there's any current i would love an invite

nukk3r

Better ask here https://forums.elderscrollsonline.com/en/categories/en-pc-mac-eu

Ratzkifal

There is always the guild finder you can use in game to find guilds and send applications directly.
I would guess most guilds are LGBT+ friendly but I am sure there are plenty of guilds around that explicitly state they are LGBT+ friendly in their description, so go with those if you don't want to gamble or are explicitly looking for LGBT+ friends.

Orion_89

Is it so important to you? I doubt that someone cares about your preferences as long as you are not disturbing them as gamers. Good luck searching!

Waits_Behind_Walls

Orion_89 wrote: »

Is it so important to you? I doubt that someone cares about your preferences as long as you are not disturbing them as gamers. Good luck searching!

The fact that it's so important to many gamers should suggest that maybe your guess is not correct. People know what they can expect and they'd rather avoid it.

Orion_89

Waits_Behind_Walls wrote: »

Orion_89 wrote: »

Is it so important to you? I doubt that someone cares about your preferences as long as you are not disturbing them as gamers. Good luck searching!

The fact that it's so important to many gamers should suggest that maybe your guess is not correct. People know what they can expect and they'd rather avoid it.

Well, not sure how you know that this is important to "many gamers", but if it is — so be it. What I was trying to say, that ESO comunity mostly friendly and there are many good people! (Except dps-daddies maybe)

SilverBride

How would anyone in any guild even know what your sexual preference is? I guess I just don't understand the need to label people.

sarahthes

SilverBride wrote: »

How would anyone in any guild even know what your sexual preference is? I guess I just don't understand the need to label people.

It's not that people need to know that, but there's an awful lot of casual homophobia out there - typically stuff that most people wouldn't even report, but which is still pretty gross and unwelcoming. Joining a guild that advertises as LGBTQ-friendly reduces the likelihood of being exposed to those kinds of microaggressions.

FangOfTheTwoMoons

sarahthes wrote: »

SilverBride wrote: »

How would anyone in any guild even know what your sexual preference is? I guess I just don't understand the need to label people.

It's not that people need to know that, but there's an awful lot of casual homophobia out there - typically stuff that most people wouldn't even report, but which is still pretty gross and unwelcoming. Joining a guild that advertises as LGBTQ-friendly reduces the likelihood of being exposed to those kinds of microaggressions.

This is actually the best explanation I've read. Some people just don't like hearing certain things and that should be fine.

Whenever I saw a LGBTQ+ guild advertisement I use to think to myself "well why would anyone need to advertise that specifically?" But then I realized not everyone is a normal human being and can function without being totally obnoxious or straight up homophobic, so it makes perfect sense that some people would like to surround themselves around other like minded individuals and avoid potentially toxic individuals.

Jayroo

pretty sure OP didn't ask for a sly/condescending remark .

Try the guild recruitment section at the bottom of the forums, you will likely have an easier time avoiding degenerates there

Minyassa

FangOfTheTwoMoons wrote: »

sarahthes wrote: »

SilverBride wrote: »

How would anyone in any guild even know what your sexual preference is? I guess I just don't understand the need to label people.

It's not that people need to know that, but there's an awful lot of casual homophobia out there - typically stuff that most people wouldn't even report, but which is still pretty gross and unwelcoming. Joining a guild that advertises as LGBTQ-friendly reduces the likelihood of being exposed to those kinds of microaggressions.

This is actually the best explanation I've read. Some people just don't like hearing certain things and that should be fine.

Whenever I saw a LGBTQ+ guild advertisement I use to think to myself "well why would anyone need to advertise that specifically?" But then I realized not everyone is a normal human being and can function without being totally obnoxious or straight up homophobic, so it makes perfect sense that some people would like to surround themselves around other like minded individuals and avoid potentially toxic individuals.

That is exactly it. There is nothing quite like joining a guild you're excited about working with because they do content in a way you're looking forward to trying, they have a lovely guild hall, they're really enthusiastic and friendly and then someone just casually throws a homophobic or transphobic remark out and other people laugh or run with it and you suddenly realize that they are snakes in the grass and then you have to make some excuse to drop out so they won't all pile on you viciously for daring to not feel comfortable around that.

Scardan

FangOfTheTwoMoons wrote: »

sarahthes wrote: »

SilverBride wrote: »

How would anyone in any guild even know what your sexual preference is? I guess I just don't understand the need to label people.

It's not that people need to know that, but there's an awful lot of casual homophobia out there - typically stuff that most bout people wouldn't even report, but which is still pretty gross and unwelcoming. Joining a guild that advertises as LGBTQ-friendly reduces the likelihood of being exposed to those kinds of microaggressions.

This is actually the best explanation I've read. Some people just don't like hearing certain things and that should be fine.

Whenever I saw a LGBTQ+ guild advertisement I use to think to myself "well why would anyone need to advertise that specifically?" But then I realized not everyone is a normal human being and can function without being totally obnoxious or straight up homophobic, so it makes perfect sense that some people would like to surround themselves around other like minded individuals and avoid potentially toxic individuals.

I feel bad for discussing RL problems on a gaming forum.

Synthwavius

Kojran wrote: »

I know this has been asked (countless times) but the threads seem old and or the guilds not around or the mail doesnt recognise the player when i try to send them an ingame email. What LGBT+ guilds are there? I am on PC, using the EU server but playing from Australia

I'm in one but it's a LGBT friendly guild so not that much rainbow around

SilverBride

FangOfTheTwoMoons wrote: »

...it makes perfect sense that some people would like to surround themselves around other like minded individuals and avoid potentially toxic individuals.

Players are toxic about a lot of things. Just read zone chat sometimes. But guilds don't generally tolerate that kind of behavior in their chat. At least I've never seen it.

But I still don't understand how anyone would even know what your preference is unless you make a point of announcing it. And why would anyone feel the need to do that?

FangOfTheTwoMoons

Scardan wrote: »

FangOfTheTwoMoons wrote: »

sarahthes wrote: »

SilverBride wrote: »

How would anyone in any guild even know what your sexual preference is? I guess I just don't understand the need to label people.

It's not that people need to know that, but there's an awful lot of casual homophobia out there - typically stuff that most bout people wouldn't even report, but which is still pretty gross and unwelcoming. Joining a guild that advertises as LGBTQ-friendly reduces the likelihood of being exposed to those kinds of microaggressions.

This is actually the best explanation I've read. Some people just don't like hearing certain things and that should be fine.

Whenever I saw a LGBTQ+ guild advertisement I use to think to myself "well why would anyone need to advertise that specifically?" But then I realized not everyone is a normal human being and can function without being totally obnoxious or straight up homophobic, so it makes perfect sense that some people would like to surround themselves around other like minded individuals and avoid potentially toxic individuals.

I feel bad for discussing RL problems on a gaming forum.

Agreed, but people don't know how to act like rational humans so its brought up. Especially since this real life problem is essentially an ingame problem aswell since, ya know, an MMO is about being social and it's a social issue lol. So I'm not really sure what you tried to accomplish by commenting that. Unless it was unrelated to this specific topic.

Waits_Behind_Walls

SilverBride wrote: »

But I still don't understand how anyone would even know what your preference is unless you make a point of announcing it. And why would anyone feel the need to do that?

If the guild knows I'm male IRL, and I say I've got to leave to meet my boyfriend, I've just done that. It's a relatively casual thing to say.

FangOfTheTwoMoons

SilverBride wrote: »

FangOfTheTwoMoons wrote: »

...it makes perfect sense that some people would like to surround themselves around other like minded individuals and avoid potentially toxic individuals.

Players are toxic about a lot of things. Just read zone chat sometimes. But guilds don't generally tolerate that kind of behavior in their chat. At least I've never seen it.

But I still don't understand how anyone would even know what your preference is unless you make a point of announcing it. And why would anyone feel the need to do that?

If you read the explanation above you'd understand it's not about announcing their sexuality but to avoid people saying things they wouldnt like to hear. Which again is perfectly fine. Some guilds are more lax on what can be said so saying homophobic things usually just slides right by anyway. Unless you're being really blatant about the homophobic things you're saying. Sometimes it could just be jokes with no ill intent, but to so some people that hurts their feelings, and that can be contributed to various things that they have experienced outside of the game.

I think people are going out of their way to avoid understanding that simple idea. (Not talking about you in particular)

SilverBride

FangOfTheTwoMoons wrote: »

If you read the explanation above you'd understand it's not about announcing their sexuality but to avoid people saying things they wouldnt like to hear.

We all have things we don't like to hear. I just don't see how isolating yourself from the general playerbase is a solution.

Grandchamp1989

Minyassa wrote: »

FangOfTheTwoMoons wrote: »

sarahthes wrote: »

SilverBride wrote: »

How would anyone in any guild even know what your sexual preference is? I guess I just don't understand the need to label people.

It's not that people need to know that, but there's an awful lot of casual homophobia out there - typically stuff that most people wouldn't even report, but which is still pretty gross and unwelcoming. Joining a guild that advertises as LGBTQ-friendly reduces the likelihood of being exposed to those kinds of microaggressions.

This is actually the best explanation I've read. Some people just don't like hearing certain things and that should be fine.

Whenever I saw a LGBTQ+ guild advertisement I use to think to myself "well why would anyone need to advertise that specifically?" But then I realized not everyone is a normal human being and can function without being totally obnoxious or straight up homophobic, so it makes perfect sense that some people would like to surround themselves around other like minded individuals and avoid potentially toxic individuals.

That is exactly it. There is nothing quite like joining a guild you're excited about working with because they do content in a way you're looking forward to trying, they have a lovely guild hall, they're really enthusiastic and friendly and then someone just casually throws a homophobic or transphobic remark out and other people laugh or run with it and you suddenly realize that they are snakes in the grass and then you have to make some excuse to drop out so they won't all pile on you viciously for daring to not feel comfortable around that.

I have been in 7 guilds on PC EU and I don't think I have ever experienced that lol.

Not saying there isn't weirdo people, but they mostly seem to spam zone chat since they can't stay in a guild for very long before they get kicked.

I don't quite understand why... if people use games as escapeism why would people drag their personal choices and opinions into the game? Who people choose to have sex with, political discussions and real life religion... Doesn't it take away from what most people try to accomplish with gaming? To get away....

I don't know, maybe it's just me but I try to let my gaming experience be about the game itself.. And even then things may go sour really quick when talk game balance with people XD

milesrodneymcneely2_ESO

sarahthes wrote: »

SilverBride wrote: »

How would anyone in any guild even know what your sexual preference is? I guess I just don't understand the need to label people.

It's not that people need to know that, but there's an awful lot of casual homophobia out there - typically stuff that most people wouldn't even report, but which is still pretty gross and unwelcoming. Joining a guild that advertises as LGBTQ-friendly reduces the likelihood of being exposed to those kinds of microaggressions.

As a gay man myself, I've found the ESO community to be nothing but welcoming. Sure, there are random jerks out there, but - unless you're a minor - you should be at a point in your adult development where you can either report them and go on, or fire back and have fun with it.

I'm sorry, I think that giving credence to the concept of a "microaggression" is both silly and counterproductive. In my opinion, if you're in such a fragile place emotionally that you feel harmed by innocuous things, then the services of a good therapist might be a better use of your time and revenue than an MMORPG. When you have some good coping skills on board, then rejoin the tribe and show them how it's done.

No disrespect intended, but if our movement is going to preach empowerment, we have to start that journey within ourselves, not expect the world to change around us.

It's not CHIM, and we're not Talos or Vivec. Much love to you all!

Jaraal

SilverBride wrote: »

But I still don't understand how anyone would even know what your preference is unless you make a point of announcing it. And why would anyone feel the need to do that?

Most mmo gamers know someone or several someones who have met and formed real life relationships with someone they met in game. Also, most people prefer to associate with like-minded individuals, and will do what is necessary to surround themselves with welcoming people.

Obviously, not everyone is looking to make relationships..... but why would you not want to hang out with people who think the same way as you do?

Grandchamp1989

milesrodneymcneely2_ESO wrote: »

sarahthes wrote: »

SilverBride wrote: »

How would anyone in any guild even know what your sexual preference is? I guess I just don't understand the need to label people.

It's not that people need to know that, but there's an awful lot of casual homophobia out there - typically stuff that most people wouldn't even report, but which is still pretty gross and unwelcoming. Joining a guild that advertises as LGBTQ-friendly reduces the likelihood of being exposed to those kinds of microaggressions.

As a gay man myself, I've found the ESO community to be nothing but welcoming. Sure, there are random jerks out there, but - unless you're a minor - you should be at a point in your adult development where you can either report them and go on, or fire back and have fun with it.

I'm sorry, I think that giving credence to the concept of a "microaggression" is both silly and counterproductive. In my opinion, if you're in such a fragile place emotionally that you feel harmed by innocuous things, then the services of a good therapist might be a better use of your time and revenue than an MMORPG. When you have some good coping skills on board, then rejoin the tribe and show them how it's done.

No disrespect intended, but if our movement is going to preach empowerment, we have to start that journey within ourselves, not expect the world to change around us.

It's not CHIM, and we're not Talos or Vivec. Much love to you all!

From a human perspective I can understand why we would try to distance ourselves from situations that may be hurtful.

My experience with the internet is a bit different. I have lost people to deadly diseases and when people casually say that the game or experience is pure 'Insert disease' it makes me feel extremely uncomfortable.

Some A-hole even said to my GF to get said disease... And she recently lost her father to it.

I'm just not sure the solution is isolation....
I'm sure I'm no saint either and have said things that made people think "What an ignorant jerk"

Even if people agree that "Insert topic" is bad to joke around with you may quickly find other aspects of peoples life you disagree with.. may even be offended by it.

We all come from different backgrounds with different experiences...

At some point I think we have to learn to shed our tribal mentality and learn to cope with each other..
Hopefully in an adult manner sooner rather than later.

SilverBride

Jaraal wrote: »

SilverBride wrote: »

But I still don't understand how anyone would even know what your preference is unless you make a point of announcing it. And why would anyone feel the need to do that?

Most mmo gamers know someone or several someones who have met and formed real life relationships with someone they met in game. Also, most people prefer to associate with like-minded individuals, and will do what is necessary to surround themselves with welcoming people.

Obviously, not everyone is looking to make relationships..... but why would you not want to hang out with people who think the same way as you do?

Are you saying straight people can't be like minded with LGBTQ people? I have more than one friend from that community because our friendships are based on having similar values and interests... not what our sexual preferences are.

Vanya

An LGBT Guild with Altmer Female ONLY characters! Consider me IN! Dream comes true

milesrodneymcneely2_ESO

Grandchamp1989 wrote: »

milesrodneymcneely2_ESO wrote: »

sarahthes wrote: »

SilverBride wrote: »

How would anyone in any guild even know what your sexual preference is? I guess I just don't understand the need to label people.

It's not that people need to know that, but there's an awful lot of casual homophobia out there - typically stuff that most people wouldn't even report, but which is still pretty gross and unwelcoming. Joining a guild that advertises as LGBTQ-friendly reduces the likelihood of being exposed to those kinds of microaggressions.

As a gay man myself, I've found the ESO community to be nothing but welcoming. Sure, there are random jerks out there, but - unless you're a minor - you should be at a point in your adult development where you can either report them and go on, or fire back and have fun with it.

I'm sorry, I think that giving credence to the concept of a "microaggression" is both silly and counterproductive. In my opinion, if you're in such a fragile place emotionally that you feel harmed by innocuous things, then the services of a good therapist might be a better use of your time and revenue than an MMORPG. When you have some good coping skills on board, then rejoin the tribe and show them how it's done.

No disrespect intended, but if our movement is going to preach empowerment, we have to start that journey within ourselves, not expect the world to change around us.

It's not CHIM, and we're not Talos or Vivec. Much love to you all!

From a human perspective I can understand why we would try to distance ourselves from situations that may be hurtful.

My experience with the internet is a bit different. I have lost people to deadly diseases and when people casually say that the game or experience is pure 'Insert disease' it makes me feel extremely uncomfortable.

Some A-hole even said to my GF to get said disease... And she recently lost her father to it.

I'm just not sure the solution is isolation....
I'm sure I'm no saint either and have said things that made people think "What an ignorant jerk"

Even if people agree that "Insert topic" is bad to joke around with you may quickly find other aspects of peoples life you disagree with.. may even be offended by it.

We all come from different backgrounds with different experiences...

At some point I think we have to learn to shed our tribal mentality and learn to cope with each other..
Hopefully in an adult manner sooner rather than later.

I completely agree with you. Even though I think someone might read our posts and think there's daylight between them, I don't think that's the case.

I'll be 47 in April (and spent 27 years in an actual, textbook cult where homosexuality was expressly forbidden and chalked up to demonic influence) so I'm not coming at this from a fresh, unsullied perspective. I've been there, my sweet friend, and you're right. It is NOT easy.

I think what I've learned in my nearly five decades is this: You and I don't really have a lot of control over what happens on the front end of things. We can advocate for the world to change, and we should. But, at the end of the day, the only real control we have is over how we respond.

For me, I got tired of ceding my control to people who didn't care at all about my feelings. So, I decided that no one but ME got a say in determining how I felt. I stopped worrying about being accepted and started asking myself, "Do I accept THEM"? They may fill the space with negativity, but I'll be DAMNED if they're going to run me out of it, or take away my joy.

Of course, taking up the study of Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu was the best thing I've ever done for myself (talk about EMPOWERMENT) and I can't recommend it enough. You'd be surprised just how much better you feel about EVERYTHING when you learn how to dislocate someone's shoulder. Ha ha ha! (Seriously, though. Can't recommend it enough, and encourage ALL of you to find a class. You won't regret it.)

Okay, I do apologize for the wall of text, but I said all that to say that I do believe we're on the same page. I just want my sisters, brothers, and others to find that place of quiet strength that comes with knowing who we are. I think we owe that example to the folks coming after us.

Hey, my love to all of you. BEARHUGS!!!

Vanya

Minyassa wrote: »

FangOfTheTwoMoons wrote: »

sarahthes wrote: »

SilverBride wrote: »

How would anyone in any guild even know what your sexual preference is? I guess I just don't understand the need to label people.

It's not that people need to know that, but there's an awful lot of casual homophobia out there - typically stuff that most people wouldn't even report, but which is still pretty gross and unwelcoming. Joining a guild that advertises as LGBTQ-friendly reduces the likelihood of being exposed to those kinds of microaggressions.

This is actually the best explanation I've read. Some people just don't like hearing certain things and that should be fine.

Whenever I saw a LGBTQ+ guild advertisement I use to think to myself "well why would anyone need to advertise that specifically?" But then I realized not everyone is a normal human being and can function without being totally obnoxious or straight up homophobic, so it makes perfect sense that some people would like to surround themselves around other like minded individuals and avoid potentially toxic individuals.

That is exactly it. There is nothing quite like joining a guild you're excited about working with because they do content in a way you're looking forward to trying, they have a lovely guild hall, they're really enthusiastic and friendly and then someone just casually throws a homophobic or transphobic remark out and other people laugh or run with it and you suddenly realize that they are snakes in the grass and then you have to make some excuse to drop out so they won't all pile on you viciously for daring to not feel comfortable around that.

That sums it up accurately. Tis exactly why is wise to do a research prior joining any guild or ask the details in advance. I can fully comprehend the reasons,Not only they can feel awkward and disappointing,but highly offensive and even disturbing. I truly dislike the advert of certain guilds we are all "nice" "friendly" "helpful" and when you join an opposite tale awaits. Do not be afraid to talk with leader at least to know what to expect. I joined ONCE in Elder Scrolls Online ended with immature daily Drama. Quite possibly never again. I have my own Guild. LGBT Hate must end,you may not be one or agree with their views or approach,but there is no excuse for abuse.A truth sadly ,they can turn against you rapidly twist it over, I really feel sorry for newbies or people that are not experienced enough to escape such a web. Becoming a victim and target of online abuse is scary,even more if it comes in game you so much love.

Massacre_Wurm

Grandchamp1989 wrote: »

My experience with the internet is a bit different. I have lost people to deadly diseases and when people casually say that the game or experience is pure 'Insert disease' it makes me feel extremely uncomfortable.

Mee too and i couldnt care less because i understand concept of metaphor. And the whole "you cant joke about X" or "casually talk about X" is just absurd. Should i be a drama queen each time people around me "casually" talking about drinking because my grandfather was alcoholic and died at 56 ? I will never understand this.

Waits_Behind_Walls

milesrodneymcneely2_ESO wrote: »

I think what I've learned in my nearly five decades is this: You and I don't really have a lot of control over what happens on the front end of things. We can advocate for the world to change, and we should. But, at the end of the day, the only real control we have is over how we respond.

OK, so that's a great outlook and all, but we have control over what guilds we join. These are simply people we deal with somewhat more often than other players. Why not choose to join those that advertise they will be free of at least one type of bad behavior?

milesrodneymcneely2_ESO

Waits_Behind_Walls wrote: »

milesrodneymcneely2_ESO wrote: »

I think what I've learned in my nearly five decades is this: You and I don't really have a lot of control over what happens on the front end of things. We can advocate for the world to change, and we should. But, at the end of the day, the only real control we have is over how we respond.

OK, so that's a great outlook and all, but we have control over what guilds we join. These are simply people we deal with somewhat more often than other players. Why not choose to join those that advertise they will be free of at least one type of bad behavior?

This be true.

Nyladreas

As a rightful member of the LGBTQ+ community myself I've never honestly understood this utterly asinine and hypocritical need of a younger generation to be labeled, treated and viewed different at all costs while also aggressively implying they're not different at all. Yes we are different, yes we should be proud of it and deserve to be open with it. AND WE TOTALLY CAN. I ASSURE YOU 95% OF PEOPLE DON'T CARE. You make it out to be something else though!

TBH I feel crap like this is actually creating a whole lot more artificial hostility towards us than there ever was or actually would be.

[Snip]? I've dealt with extreme hatred and homophobia in my life, but jokes and harmless banter? That just makes me laugh ffs. You know what real homophobia is? I've actually been beaten up, had rocks and bricks threwn at me, received death threats, had my home sprayed over, someone started a fire in my backyard. What you folks are afraid of theses days absolutely blows my mind. Somebody makes a joke and ERMAHGERD. What is it these days? Especially since LGBTQ+ has become 20x more accepted than it ever was?

Seriously, we (you) are creating this ourselves in part because we (you) constantly feel the need to tell everyone how different we are. AND WE ARE BUT WHY SHOULD WE AVOID OTHER POEPLE THAT ARE FINE WITH US?! For the sake of the few *** idiots who even the cis/hetero people can't stand and would instantly ban/remove from their life!? WTF MAN!

I will never understand this new fad. If you were here to ERP or look for a good time or specifically friends in LGBTQ+ i would understand that. But since most people justify it here with comments that we see... Just ... What????

People are here to play a fantasy game, to enjoy a story (in a world where being homosexual is completely fine and natural btw). If you're here for something else than that then please stop using excuses and admit it. I'm sick and tired of people who know nothing of real homophobia constantly throwing that around because Somebody made a harmless (and If you really think about it) often actually funny joke.

People create "safe havens" where there need to be NONE these days. Just be a genuine good person.

PS: I've played MMOs since the old glory days of Ultima Online. Never EVER have I been a subject to direct or hostile homophobia in MMOs once in my life.

[Edited for bait]