I don't remember Skyrim being so cold. I hardly can believe I even made it to Falkreath, but I am quite pleased I did. It seems familiar to me, even though I have never actually visited the small town, so far removed from Whiterun. The Nords here, however, seem like the family I left behind when I joined the Imperial Army, and because they are Nord, I am also pleased I do not have my Imperial armor anymore. I am thinking they would not have taken to it considering the happenings of late.
The inn I am in does not bear a name, and I did not bother to ask it. The owner and his wife are very polite and helpful, but then I am paying fairly well. I had earned some gold in the months of my trip across Cyrodiil. People are happy to give offerings when you cleanse their property of the many undead wandering around. I must admit I did not do it for completely unselfish reasons, I checked each undead that I dispatched, in hopes they were not Holly are her family. I wonder if the undead that I encountered near Bruma as I made my way here was part of the same large group that destroyed the farm? It seems the necromancers that control the undead sometimes lose that control, or maybe they die in one way or another, and the undead then wander almost, seemingly, with no real direction.
I was granted a special gift while in the service of the Fighter's Guild that has at times assisted me in killing the undead. We were dispatched to destroy some undead and their vampire ruler in, of all things, a temple of Merid-Nunda, or Meridia, as most call her. The priestess that hired us said she was an ancient goddess that was once Aedra, but I truly do not trust any of the Daedra. We did our job, though we lost two members in the process, and one other quit the guild. We received our pay and as we were leaving the priestess asked to speak with me. She said I was watched by Meridia, due to a cousin of mine that is devout and has prayed constantly for my protection. It could only be Johann that she speaks of, my mother's sister's son. Meridia was pleased at what we did, and for that I can call on her time to time to assist me. I did not know what that meant until undead were surrounding me and I called on her. A blazing sword came forth and smote them.
Even with this curse I still have access to such, yet at times it feels I am being torn apart when I do call on the sword I have come to know as Dawnbreaker, especially during a full moon when I can hardly keep the beast within me at bay.
Are they fighting over my soul? Why would such creatures care about one mortal? Is this Meridia the mystery lady that haunts my dreams at times? I have no answer to that.
Belwin found me here in Falkreath. I was not trying to hide from her in particular, but with such a curse I felt it better to remain alone. To be honest I was glad she found me. She told me she would not leave me, and explained to me what happened at Blue Road Keep. She told me I saved her from the soldiers, even though I was turned, and felt I would not harm her even though I was werewolf. I could not turn her away, as she spent weeks tracking me here. I let her into my room, and now into my bed.
I should have known I could not lose her. She is wood elf, and probably considered a good tracker even for them.
Werewolf. Such a strange thing. A strange curse. It effects me in subtle ways from day to day. I hunger more, and tend to like my food, well, less cooked with less season. I hear very well, as if my ears were new again. It is as if my senses have not been dulled by time. I do not think they are as good as a wolf's, but they seem to be on par with even Belwin. I also have stronger urges as a man. I think Belwin realizes this and plays on that very weakness of mine now. I cannot say I am unhappy with it, but the passion and raw instincts that comes with all of this unsettles me some.
The worst part of this curse is when a full moon approaches. I begin to lose control, and can easily change if I do not watch my emotions. Strong emotions can set it off, and the creature can become unleashed, so to speak.
The change itself is horrific and quite painful, as if the wolf is clawing it's way out of my skin. It may well be just that, on a different level. I cannot say. I wonder if it feels imprisoned while I am in control, or if I am indeed both the wolf and myself and the wolf does not exist separate from me. Belwin says there is no cure that she knows of, and her people know much of such things. She tells me to embrace who I am, to stop considering it a curse and think of it as a blessing.
I find that very hard to do.
I told Belwin we will keep in Falkreath for a bit. We will need to earn some gold and buy equipment before we make the trek to Whiterun. Belwin heard that there were some bandits to the south of town hold up in a cave. They have been shaking the merchants down for some time, and the town is sick of them. They will pay for their removal, so that is what we will be doing soon. I do not mind such work, as it is similar to what I do as a member of the Fighter's Guild. I was assured they are murderers and scoundrels, and that if I must kill them, it would be justice for the ones they murdered and ***. It is a good time to take such a job as the moon Masser is waning, and I hardly even feel the beast within.
Edited by Krist on April 17, 2016 4:31AM "Krist the Lionheart? No. Lionheart was my dog" -Krist
"Darling, if looks were everything, I would be king of the world" -Luke
"That place, between day and night, that purple color just before dark, that is where you will find me"- Hughe