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Please stop being rude in (random dungeon) chat

tincanman
tincanman
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As per title.

My friend (no forum account) was running tempest island normal (random group due to time constraints) - fake tank (ok), my friend was healer with resto staff and associated skills. Their character was mid 30's levels, one other character around 40th and 2 high cp players. My friend said 'hi..quest' and the high cp guys cleared the beach, which is a prerequisite for the quest, very quickly and started a typical fast run. My friend aware of both the needs of the high cp players wanting a fast completion, the lack of a tank and their own experience as a player ran ahead at times to gather trash at natural choke points so the high cp players could demolish them in short order while minimally interacting with quest npc/objects so as not to slow down the run. At the end, there's a trash mob which you can ride past or pull to the top. If you're doing the quest and to help with potential delays, it's useful to ride ahead to speak with the quest giver npc to initiate the final boss encounter, which my friend did. At this point the 'rant' from the 40th level started..."speed runners" this and " speed runners" that and "I'm not playing and I'm taking my ball" nonsense. My friend responded in chat with encouragement, "please relax, please let's have fun together" sort of stuff while briefly explaining why they were doing what they were doing, which the other two group members were happy with (not so much with the 40th level's expletive-loaded, insulting commentary, though). After thanking the group my friend quit, grateful for the skill point and the help provided by the considerate high cp players only to receive a personal whispered insult from the 40th-ish level player.

For me, personally, the comment was something I would've ignored but my friend is pretty sensitive, empathetic and gentle and doesn't want to give offence but was quite upset about this.

I'm posting this to hopefully invite others to see that the current dungeon random group finder has options if you're not happy with your random group: you can initiate a vote-to-kick a player or you can ask to be kicked yourself (no time penalty) or you can just quit the group (may incur time penalty for subsequent queue). Of course you can ask people to slow down - in this case if this was mentioned, my friend almost certainly would've explained their actions sooner but would have been happy to slow down and do the trash mobs piecemeal - while the high cp players would have probably run ahead and demolished everything anyway. But please STOP posting your personal invective in group/whispered chat - trolling and trash-talking and being personally rude is just NOT ok. If you are doing this then YOU are the problem.

May I encourage people to please be mindful that however angry or upset you might feel about something you may very well have misinterpreted in game, particularly the perceived actions of others, there is another human being at the receiving end of your hurtful group/private messages.

Thank you.
Edited by ZOS_Icy on October 15, 2023 6:38PM
  • ZOS_Icy
    ZOS_Icy
    mod
    Greetings,

    After further review we have decided to move this thread to a category we think is more appropriate for this topic.

    Thank you for your understanding.
    Staff Post
  • jcaceresw
    jcaceresw
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    It's high time ZOS add to every dungeon the option to solo them so we can do the associated quest at the expense of no group achievements unlocking (no death, kill X amount). This way, the dungeon quest won't appear on normal or veteran runs and you get the associated achievements only when doing them.
  • Mesite
    Mesite
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    I used to suspect that sometimes other players were bots or AI. When people are rude it proves they aren't and they are real people, so it allays my suspicions.

    There is another option if you find yourself in an unpleasant dungeon group. Switch off the game (at the electric or use task manager). I don't know if you incur any penalties for losing contact with the game.

    If you lose contact by, say, a loss of electric and thus remain in the group, do you still get the xp if they complete the dungeon?
  • SilverBride
    SilverBride
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    The friend may have had good intentions but what they were doing by running ahead like that is what a speed runner looks like, and a lot of players don't enjoy that.
    PCNA
  • wilykcat
    wilykcat
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    When I'm focused on completing the dungeon, I forget the chat box is there and not notice anything being said. I keep on fighting the monsters, doing mechanics, and following along with the group. This happens to me most of the time.

    I sometimes will notice tangerine colored text that's popping up when players are non-stop chatting. Then I put my focus on what's going on in the chat instead of doing the dungeon.

    When I notice a player being rude to me, I politely ask them to stop. If not and it gets worse, I block and report. If others start joining in, I'll leave the dungeon and queue for another one.
  • endgamesmug
    endgamesmug
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    Ill always stop for the quester if he needs to check in with the quest npc periodically but i do like my runs brisk otherwise. I did have a normal dlc random the other day that i got the sanctimonious tank and healer, who treated it like vet and tried to tell everyone how to play and at an unnecessarily slow pace then commenting how slow it was at the end! 😑
    Edited by endgamesmug on October 16, 2023 3:15AM
  • AvalonRanger
    AvalonRanger
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    Don't use random grouping tools, if you want specific style players.
    It's a basic ESO common knowledge.

    My playing time Mon-Friday UTC13:00-16:00 [PC-NA] CP over2000 now.
    I have [1Tough tank] [1StamSorc-DD] [1Necro-DD] [1Real Healer]
    with [1Stam Blade].
    But, I'm Tank main player. Recently I'm doing Healer.

    2023/12/21
    By the way...Dungeon-Meshi(One of Famous Japanese fantasy story comic book) got finale...
    Good-bye "King of Monster Eater".

    2024/08/23
    Farewell Atsuko Tanaka...(-_-) I never forget epic acting for major Motoko Kusanagi.
  • Necrotech_Master
    Necrotech_Master
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    jcaceresw wrote: »
    It's high time ZOS add to every dungeon the option to solo them so we can do the associated quest at the expense of no group achievements unlocking (no death, kill X amount). This way, the dungeon quest won't appear on normal or veteran runs and you get the associated achievements only when doing them.

    i actually have gotten some no death achievements by soloing the easier non-dlc dungeons on vet lol

    you dont get those anyway running on normal
    Edited by Necrotech_Master on October 17, 2023 4:52PM
    plays PC/NA
    handle @Necrotech_Master
    active player since april 2014

    i have my main house (grand topal hideaway) listed in the housing tours, it has multiple target dummies, scribing altar, and grandmaster stations (in progress being filled out), as well as almost every antiquity furnishing on display to preview them

    feel free to stop by and use the facilities
  • tincanman
    tincanman
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    The friend may have had good intentions but what they were doing by running ahead like that is what a speed runner looks like, and a lot of players don't enjoy that.
    Don't use random grouping tools, if you want specific style players.
    It's a basic ESO common knowledge.
    ZOS_Icy wrote: »
    Greetings,

    After further review we have decided to move this thread to a category we think is more appropriate for this topic.

    Thank you for your understanding.

    Perhaps I diluted the point, which I intended to be signifcantly more general, with too specific and long-winded an example. Please, allow me to clarify:

    rather than wait until the END to whine about speed-runners, quest, red nb, or that-damned-dk-cheat-that killed me-in-pvp or whatever , wherever while winding yourself up to an abusively explosive expletive dump in any chat, just state your objectives calmly and succinctly at start of whatever undertaking, understanding that in a random gameplay situation no one is obliged to agree or adhere to your request. Or just leave the 'room' if whatever is going on bothers you that much.

    You know: be nice or, failing that, aim for simple courtesy. :)

    Thanks.

  • ForzaRammer
    ForzaRammer
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    Why you even bother carrying the level 40 guy, i’d just tell him in group chat, “you are no better than a companion, none of us 3 want to carry a deadweight, either you shut up or we kick you”
  • AvalonRanger
    AvalonRanger
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    tincanman wrote: »
    ...I'm posting this to hopefully invite others to see that the current dungeon random group finder has options if you're not happy with your random group: you can initiate a vote-to-kick a player or you can ask to be kicked yourself (no time penalty) or you can just quit the group (may incur time penalty for subsequent queue)...

    "if you're not happy with your random group"
    "Please stop being rude in (random dungeon) chat Bookmark"
    Hmm... :/

    It feels like little bit idealized demanding. 60% of PUG member can't make me happy actually.
    I met super great DD and nice skillful healer several times, but just 40% of PUG people.
    My tank is enough tough build, but 60% of PUG Vet attempting are failed by brain dead DD and
    crappy healer. Actually say, CP400 player can't do Vet dungeon mostly.

    If I can do every Vet DLC dungeon by solo tank , then I'll kick 60% PUG people. No joking.
    Once my DD kill the normal Depths of Malatar second boss by solo, because I met CP1900 almost fake tank
    and CP over 1000 brain dead DD and fake healer. Totally not happy at all. But it's a PUG usual.

    But, random means random. Keep constructive conversation with your team to solve
    unreasonable suffering PUG life, and If I can't find solution with PUG people, then just leave.

    By the way, What does it mean "rude"?
    "Hey! Show me your healing skill. Are you fake healer?"
    Oh? Is this "rude"?
    Then how about this? " Would you mind to avoid almost fake healer building?" :*
    I think latter is more sarcasm feeling.




    My playing time Mon-Friday UTC13:00-16:00 [PC-NA] CP over2000 now.
    I have [1Tough tank] [1StamSorc-DD] [1Necro-DD] [1Real Healer]
    with [1Stam Blade].
    But, I'm Tank main player. Recently I'm doing Healer.

    2023/12/21
    By the way...Dungeon-Meshi(One of Famous Japanese fantasy story comic book) got finale...
    Good-bye "King of Monster Eater".

    2024/08/23
    Farewell Atsuko Tanaka...(-_-) I never forget epic acting for major Motoko Kusanagi.
  • AvalonRanger
    AvalonRanger
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    Why you even bother carrying the level 40 guy, i’d just tell him in group chat, “you are no better than a companion, none of us 3 want to carry a deadweight, either you shut up or we kick you”

    Once I met Lv40 baby tank at the normal Depths of Malatar.
    That dude keep complaining against us, because we keep killing trash mobs before taunting.

    Baby tank said: "You guys must keep pacing and speed."

    Another DD said: "But, you can't taunt 10 mobs at once. It is meaningless tank."

    Maybe, Mr baby tank was real noob player.
    My playing time Mon-Friday UTC13:00-16:00 [PC-NA] CP over2000 now.
    I have [1Tough tank] [1StamSorc-DD] [1Necro-DD] [1Real Healer]
    with [1Stam Blade].
    But, I'm Tank main player. Recently I'm doing Healer.

    2023/12/21
    By the way...Dungeon-Meshi(One of Famous Japanese fantasy story comic book) got finale...
    Good-bye "King of Monster Eater".

    2024/08/23
    Farewell Atsuko Tanaka...(-_-) I never forget epic acting for major Motoko Kusanagi.
  • Shaolindelt
    Shaolindelt
    Soul Shriven
    PUGs are PUGs - and you have to expect a certain "Well, this is what I got . . . "

    I'll be honest, I've had good luck overall with only a few bad runs/bad actors. But my rule:

    I always say "Hi" and tell the group why I'm there: quick random, quest, gear farm, pledge, speed run, random event box, etc.

    What I find is if I get people to read that, the group is almost always good. If someone says, "Oh, I need to do the quest, first time here!" - I'll slow down and even coach mechs even if I was just there for a gear farm. I feel like 75%+ of groups are ok with whatever individuals need, but we just want to know what that is!

    The problem I have with PUGs is when I join, say why I'm there and get nothing back. Then, I go do my thing and halfway through the dungeon, after running past multiple things, someone speaks up and complains about speed running.

    My worst PUG was FG1 during an event, where I started with "Quick speed run?" and no one replied. I ran past the first boss, to the first "gate" boss and everyone eventually caught up while I battled him. After defeating it, I ran to the water, swam to the final boss and engaged. For some reason, the other 3 started fighting the other bosses and didn't follow. I didn't know, and figure they were roughly behind me, but I had already engaged the final boss when I saw I was running him solo. I slowed down a bit with some heals but eventually just finished him. One of the other group members made it to me as I finished him off and I got my event box and then exited out.

    A few minutes later, I got a whisper from one of the group members saying that I was selfish and finished the dungeon without him and his friend keeping them from completing it and getting the quest (skill point) or the reward (event box) and I was the problem with ESO. I wrote him back saying I was clear what I was doing when I got there, was over 2000 CP, could easily solo FG1 and was doing them a favor inviting a group to tag along and pick up an event box in just a few minutes - it was his fault for not saying what he needed.

    And to be clear, yes, I've slowed down on FG1 runs when someone is under level 50 and says "Hey, first time here!"
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