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Unintentionally amusing companion moments

metheglyn
metheglyn
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I really enjoy the companion system and have fun adventuring out in Tamriel with them. Sometimes, though, their quirks and voice lines clash with the setting, leading to some quite amusing incidents.

Not long ago, I had Isobel traveling with me through Eastmarch. We were standing in a ransacked cabin in the wilderness, having just dispatched a draugr who had been feasting on the former owner of the cabin. As I looked around the cabin to assess the situation in full, Isobel wandered over to the fire and said, "This is nice. Aurelia and I used to go camping like this on High Isle."

First I just stared at her, thinking, "Really? You used to camp like this?" Then I laughed, told her to stop reminiscing, and got back to solving the mystery of the draugr infestation.

Moments like this make me like the companions even more.
  • Tenthirty2
    Tenthirty2
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    One time I was riding to a dragon in N.Elsweyr with Mirri following.
    There is a cliff along the route I just love jumping off of at full speed, the landing never kills me (CP perk) and it's FUN to fly for a couple seconds.

    I launch off the cliff and behind me I hear Mirri yell "Where did you learn how to ride, a book!?" :D
    • "Some enjoy bringing grief to others. They remind M'aiq of mudcrabs - horrible creatures, with no redeeming qualities."
    • "When my time comes, I will smile. And that will be all." -Sir Nathain Galien
    • IGN: TenThirty2 (PC/PS: NA, PC/PS: EU)
  • Necrotech_Master
    Necrotech_Master
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    the one i remember a lot is bastians "they made their choices" when entering combat with something like a wild animal (or in a case i was the one that started combat instead of the enemy stumbling across me lol)
    plays PC/NA
    handle @Necrotech_Master
    active player since april 2014

    i have my main house (grand topal hideaway) listed in the housing tours, it has multiple target dummies, scribing altar, and grandmaster stations (in progress being filled out), as well as almost every antiquity furnishing on display to preview them

    feel free to stop by and use the facilities
  • Marcus684
    Marcus684
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    I accidentally killed some creepy-crawly passive critter (a centipede I think) and Bastian said, "You're going to eat that, right?"
  • AcadianPaladin
    AcadianPaladin
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    I laughed the first time we killed a strangler and Mirri said, "Would it hurt them to run away? No, I guess it wouldn't. Maybe they should try that."
    PC NA(no Steam), PvE, mostly solo
  • metheglyn
    metheglyn
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    Tenthirty2 wrote: »
    One time I was riding to a dragon in N.Elsweyr with Mirri following.
    There is a cliff along the route I just love jumping off of at full speed, the landing never kills me (CP perk) and it's FUN to fly for a couple seconds.

    I launch off the cliff and behind me I hear Mirri yell "Where did you learn how to ride, a book!?" :D

    That's a good one; I should experiment with some bold maneuvers to see if the others critique me like that. Though, really, none of the others are quite up to Mirri's level of snark.
    I laughed the first time we killed a strangler and Mirri said, "Would it hurt them to run away? No, I guess it wouldn't. Maybe they should try that."

    Ha, that's wonderful!
  • metheglyn
    metheglyn
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    the one i remember a lot is bastians "they made their choices" when entering combat with something like a wild animal (or in a case i was the one that started combat instead of the enemy stumbling across me lol)
    Marcus684 wrote: »
    I accidentally killed some creepy-crawly passive critter (a centipede I think) and Bastian said, "You're going to eat that, right?"

    Bastian is my absolute favorite, and I don't think he's ever made a comment that didn't somehow improve my day. I've come across both those scenarios, and gotten a good chuckle out of them.
  • El_Borracho
    El_Borracho
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    metheglyn wrote: »
    the one i remember a lot is bastians "they made their choices" when entering combat with something like a wild animal (or in a case i was the one that started combat instead of the enemy stumbling across me lol)
    Marcus684 wrote: »
    I accidentally killed some creepy-crawly passive critter (a centipede I think) and Bastian said, "You're going to eat that, right?"

    Bastian is my absolute favorite, and I don't think he's ever made a comment that didn't somehow improve my day. I've come across both those scenarios, and gotten a good chuckle out of them.

    Agreed. He is the most entertaining. From hating cheese, to acting like a Greenpeace warrior any time you accidentally (or intentionally) kill a furry critter, to talking smack to someone you put an absolute beatdown on, then immediately shift into how lovely a city is or how wholesome adventuring can be
  • Gingaroth
    Gingaroth
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    I and three or four other players are strolling about, looking for some Big Bad nearby, most of us with a companion active.

    A tiny, lone goblin just happens to respawn at the wrong place at the wrong time, right in the middle of us all. The entire makeshift gang pounces on and instantly trashes him.

    As the little guy’s corpse drops to the ground, Bastian proudly calls out: “That’s how we do things in Daggerfall!
  • Celldweller
    Celldweller
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    My favourite is when Bastian gets to low health in combat and says "I'm getting my arse kicked" The first time he did that I wasn't sure if I just imagined it but no, he absolutely says it, cracks me up every time lol.
  • SeaGtGruff
    SeaGtGruff
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    I've told this story a couple of times before, but I thought it was funny, so I'll tell it again.

    I was in Northern Elsweyr with Bastian, and was up near the Tomb of the Serpents delve, which I was heading to for one of my daily quests. I was approaching the delve from the wayshrine to the west, and was fully aware of the cliff with the trail to the Tomb of the Serpents in the narrow ravine down below, but I didn't feel like going the long way around to enter the ravine from the southern end, and I was also feeling a bit silly and playful. So I very deliberately galloped at full speed toward the cliff and consciously jumped my mount over the edge, and went sailing down to the ravine below. Whee!!! Naturally, my horse and I died upon hitting the ground-- right in front of another player, who was sitting there on their mount looking rather perplexed. Then Bastian shouts out, "YOU SHALL BE AVENGED!"

    I think he was talking to my horse.
    I've fought mudcrabs more fearsome than me!
  • metheglyn
    metheglyn
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    I love all these Bastian stories! :)
  • VaranisArano
    VaranisArano
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    Back when it was just Mirri and Bastian, I wrote a bunch of snippets that are more or less inspired by the unintentional comedy inherent in companions.

    https://forums.elderscrollsonline.com/en/discussion/591512/collected-snippets-of-varanis-arano-mirri-bastian-and-marcus-titus-alessian
  • Monte_Cristo
    Monte_Cristo
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    Me: blade of woe's someone.
    Azandar: "Make better choices."

    also

    Me: falls off cliff and dies.
    Sharp, maybe (can't remember who exactly): "You should take a potion."
  • Aislinna
    Aislinna
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    The first time Bastian randomly told a dad joke, I was just flabbergasted and started laughing out loud. I can't remember the joke, but I did start paying more attention to what he said. :smiley:
  • metheglyn
    metheglyn
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    Back when it was just Mirri and Bastian, I wrote a bunch of snippets that are more or less inspired by the unintentional comedy inherent in companions.

    https://forums.elderscrollsonline.com/en/discussion/591512/collected-snippets-of-varanis-arano-mirri-bastian-and-marcus-titus-alessian

    I remember reading some of these at the time and loving them, but I certainly hadn't seen them all. Thanks for linking the thread!
  • MerguezMan
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    Bastian keeps repeating "it's a nice place to make provisions" almost anywhere (including deserts and oblivion realms) and "what will you do with that ?" for anything I pick on the ground (to which I'm always tempted to answer "I'll put that up your ...").

    Azandar seems wayyy overenthusiast for the daily enchantment thing I've done hundred times.

    Don't remember anything special about the others. Haven't levelled Sharp yet.
  • Zodiarkslayer
    Zodiarkslayer
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    Sharp after killing a random mob:
    "Better luck next time! ... Oh. Nevemind ... "
    If anyone here says: OH! But, PVP! I swear I'll ...

    Thank you for the valuable input and respectfully recommend to discuss that aspect of ESO on the PVP forum.
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