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Need Help with my RP Character

Soul Shriven
Hey guys :) im currently having problems with the story of my RP character.
I like Nords, I like Alchemy, I like rogue-ish characters and need to roleplay in Alikr. Trying to combine these is kinda hard, but i tried to come up with a story:

Super short story idea:
Didnt have success in normal Nord things, found an Eremit proficient in Alchemy (maybe was a former Assasin) and learned from him. Parents eventually recognised that their useless son could be used for something and made him kill political enemies (with poison). As he grew up he couldnt bare it anymore and ran away. Now seeking redemption for himself on his travels.

Pason grew up in Skyrim, where he was a normal child until he came into the age to learn fighting and hunting. It simply didnt suit him, all the other kids were better at it and his Parents werent exactly proud of him at that time. He became a bit of a loner because of that , trying to find something he might be good at so his parents wouldnt think hes a failure. Desperatly smelling a chance to prove himself he convinced his father to take him on a hunting trip into the mountens. That didnt go very well though, as Pason fell down somewhere and became unconscious. His Father immediatly turned around to save him, but someone else found the injured boy first. An Eremit, someone everybody in the Arena knows, but noone realy had contact with him. Reaching the Point where the boy should lie, the father ony found Footprints and followd them to the Eremits shack. He took the boy from him and brought him home. From there on things didnt really got better. The boy gave up learning fighting and hunting at all and was depressed. He went to thank his savior and saw that his hut was full of alchemical stuff so he asked him to be his Mentor. From him he learned how to make poisons, potions and the like. His family came to recognise that they can use his new talents and convinced him to kill political enemies and people in rivaling families. That went on for a while, threatening him with love withdrowal if he didnt do as they said. Eventually he couldnt handle it anymore, running away, now seeking redemption for his deeds on his travels.

Thats the story so far.. please give feedback and criticism, I kinda dont like that he is so "special", but something needs to stand out or i will get lost in the more outstanding stories of the other rp ers.
Best regards and thank you :)
  • notimetocare
    Not implausible, but it's a bit odd. I assume Eremit is hermit?

    Few of the strange thing:
    Alchemists among nords isn't rare like pure mages. Alchemy is sort of a necessity of life among all races, even the few that are more against magic.

    Assassins among nords is also a bit more of a strange thing. It is in their culture to settle scores face to face. Unlike say Bretons, where underhanded political means are common.

    Sometimes, simple is much better. Even common tropes are fine. For RP, what matters most is how they act and what drives them.

    Keeping some of your ideas intact. Something like this might be better:

    Bob, after contact with the hermit, had a knack for alchemy. Being less than honorable, his parents made use of his skills to scheme and settled scores they couldn't in honorable way. Over time, the lack of honor weighed on him. Now he travelled to find his honor again. Travelling instead to use his skills for the benefit of others. Forsaking his family and their wicked way.

    Just an example, but a good thing to keep in mind is the native culture and the personality you want your character to have.
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