(At This Time, I Honestly Believe It’s Not my Time; To Return AD)I'm Back EP (UpdatedIn 16th Comment

Serjustin19

At this time I really, don't believe. It’s my time to return to AD, No offense. I have my reasons, mostly signature wise. I have nothing against AD. Actually I was wrong, yes I had something against AD the 2nd time.

But thanks to many of you all, on forum whom helped me. As well to my friends (Guild Leader, and Guild Officer) and other friends in guild. I have calmed down.

I mean sure I was extremely hurt. Really bad, no matter what I did to try to be accepted. By majority of faction no offense. But, as of now. I totally have nothing against AD, i'm actually happy for them honestly. Least in Vivec PS4 EU, that is.

My guild leader and friend, almost got EMP today. So very close, but was to many EP and DC Today (8:25 PM PDT, currently as of this message) I of course Was on EP side, I'm a terrible friend But he don't have a problem with me on EP and not help push for his EMP.

Also I believe, 2 more members got EMP to. But it's not why I have come here. I have come here, because something is troubling me. I have been red the longest in the 4 Vivec Campaign's combined.

Even though, I have nothing against, AD currently and hopefully no more. (I also promised writing to my, Guild leader and Friend. If something else happen next time)

I still believe it's not, my time to go back. For 1, EP mostly been my enemy for 2+ year (PS4) (longer when ESO first came out on PC, before I stopped playing)

I been DC for 1 yr and AD the longest of the 3 (both PC and PS4) I believe it's fair for me to continue, to stay EP currently. Least in my opinion. At the same time, take for a moment. It don't really matter, of what I want and don't want.

For Example, Take this PS4 EU, 4th Vivec Campaign currently.



This is the current score board. In which AD is last place (3rd) While EP, the Alliance I currently serving, Is in first place (1st)

If my mind serve me right. 1st Campaign was won by *Blue (*Uncertain) While AD was 2nd place. While 2nd Campaign, *EP (*uncertain)was 1st and AD in 3rd.

In 3rd Campaign Vivec. DC was in first place (1St) and AD In Second (2ND). But the 4th and current, Vivec Campaign is hard to say. Since it not finished yet. But currently, EP is in first place (1St) while AD is in third place (3Rd)

As can see (If I got 1st and 2nd Campaign right. I think I did but uncertain) AD has been in 2nd place twice. As well as, AD being in 3rd place twice to.

while my alliance I currently serving (EP). Especially DC are both doing extremely well) In my opinion, it looks to me AD. Is kinda hurting in Score wise.

However I honestly believe, all 3 alliances have about; the same numbers. Alas, this is why I'm so hesitant to rejoin AD. Later own the road.

I will be staying EP, currently and possibly a few more campaigns. I will watch the score closely. At same time, I want to stay EP for while longer. But if others tell me to go back to AD in poll (down the line)

Especially when the score seem bad or AD, whilst the number of reinforcements are close. It’s really hard to say. But let's say if I did went back to AD.

Would they accept my help? Would I finally be accepted by majority. Finally after all this time, or would I be blamed again. For AD leaving, just like Scourge and felt in 1st and 2nd day of Vivec 3Rd Campaign)

this is my 2nd outmost reason, of why I'm hesitant. To go back to AD from EP, In Vivec PS4 EU. like how it was originally same thing. When I originally left EP to aid AD in 2nd Scourge.

(I'm also aware of spelling error, extremely tired. Will fix later, sometime.....)

Most would however say,

No matter how hard, you've tried to. Learn from the past. History, will always repeat itself.

Again, I have nothing against AD, least not anymore. Or other alliances for that matter. But these are the thoughts going through my mind. Mostly of my troubled past with AD, no offense.

In conclusion I will stay on EP, least for now. I will keep look at the score and new Vivec reset. I'm unsure if and when I leave EP or not. Or help AD Down the line. just depends on poll.

Thank you all, and every alliance

Mondini

Stop taking ESO so seriously holy bobba.

Turelus

Do What You Feel Comfortable With

Yeah... I have no idea on his one.

WildWilbur

Other

Nobody cares...

geonsocal

If AD keep Hurting In 3 more campaigns. Help AD then

embrace the cross factional playstyle...help balance the map when you can...

Serjustin19

Mondini wrote: »

Stop taking ESO so seriously holy bobba.

I'm starting, to practice. Becoming a, Library Page. ( I love books and hopefully be a better job. Than farm work, no offense.)It's a person whom helps, around library. I got some experience, Volunteer in hospital.

For 2 years, arrange and put away. Patient classified files, among other things. So it might help, in becoming. A library Page, among other things.

I'm starting to get to know, the Dewey decimal System. Practice arranging all, of my books. With, Dewey decimal System. Probably about 85 books in garage. In which I'm also starting to listen. To audio books more often though. I'll do my best to stop, taking ESO seriously though.


Library Page:

https://livonialibrary.org/about/staff/library-page-description/

Dewey Decimal System:

https://mypages.iit.edu/~smart/halsey/lesson1.htm

Serjustin19

geonsocal wrote: »

embrace the cross factional playstyle...help balance the map when you can...

@geonsocal

I have acknowledge, your answer. While I, responded to another. I wasn't sure what to say, honestly. I know you are right, eventhough. I must admit, I wasn't still sure.

Four hours had passed, since my. Last reply, of this thread. 4 hours, also helped me. Remember a certain 2, a certain 2. Whom felt the same way.

A certain 2, whom I know quite well. A certain 2, whom remind me of you. As well as, to your response. That I should help, fight for balance.

I would introduce you,these 2. Whom, used to serve in 2ND Scourge. Past would always repeat, no matter; if we wished other wise.

These are the 2, whom helped me remember. These are there voice, long ago. Voices for balance, rather if I'm ready to go back; or not. But because of those 2 and your response. As well as other's, Cyrodiil health. As well as balance, is indeed.

More important, more than I; originally wanted otherwise. Now let me introduce you to. High Priestess Emily (DC) and Princess Justine (Former DC, Currently AD) Let these 2 tell a tale. The Tale of wisdom and balance.





High Priestess Emily And Princess Justine. Trying To Save Scourge (2ND) PS4 EU

https://forums.elderscrollsonline.com/en/discussion/297550/high-priestess-emily-and-princess-justine-trying-to-save-scourge-ps4-eu#latest

Biro123

Not really sure how to say this without coming across too harshly - because this really is meant to be constructive. You sound quite young (compared to me) and as such still fairly unsure of yourself.

But its simply a game.. Play as you want and just have fun.

Stop being so self-critical. Stop asking a bunch of individuals who you don't know to make your decisions for you/validate your actions.

Stop posting so much stuff about yourself... I mean how many of your posts have 'I' in the title. Its a game forum - people here are interested in the game, not you.

Stop worrying too much about how people see you or what you think they expect of you. The harsh reality is that you can fret about that kind of stuff for ages - but eventually will learn than the vast majority of people simply don't care. In fact they probably don't even notice. You're just one of the masses in the 'massively' part of MMO.

Here's some advice from an old dog who used to be really worried about what people thought.. :
If you want people to think well of you - do stuff to help THEM, be concerned about their welfare etc. and less about your internal worries. Obviously you can't do this for everyone - so just focus it on those who are important to you and see you as being important to them (ie family and real friends). If they're not important to you - then it isn't important what they think about you. Simples.
And when you do get the odd stranger send you a nasty message - who cares? Can't please everyone all the time. You don't know them, they don't know you, so what does it matter? Just ignore it and put it down to THEM being a ***, rather than worrying about what you can change.

Turelus

Do What You Feel Comfortable With

Biro123 wrote: »

And when you do get the odd stranger send you a nasty message - who cares? Can't please everyone all the time. You don't know them, they don't know you, so what does it matter? Just ignore it and put it down to THEM being a ***, rather than worrying about what you can change.

QFT.

I wish I learnt this much earlier in my life, I would have been much happier.

Tillalarrien

LMAO

Mondini

Who, taught you punctuation; they didn't really, know what. they were talking about?

Serjustin19

Mondini wrote: »

Who, taught you punctuation; they didn't really, know what. they were talking about?

Even though English, is my Native Language. I'm still, struggling with it. However, I have come really far. Yes I failed in English, in highschool to.

Yes, I do have learning Disability. It can't be helped, it's Who and What; I Am. I know, it's no excuse. I just have to work 20x harder. Instead of other people.

But I, won't let my; learning Disability. Hold me back, as well as other's I have. Each and everyday I'm still learning. Especially, when I'm supposed to learn; much younger.

Like I said, I'm not letting my Learning Disability. Hold me back, nor I don't want; other feel sorry. It's what it is, I'm proud of Who and What I Am.

I have, accomplished so very far. Eventhough, some might get upset; By your comment. I won't because, I know you're trying to help me. In which, I'm very grateful.

In conclusion, look at my past posts. (When I first served DC Era.) I've accomplished so much. Yet, I still have far to go. Thank you, for your honest comment. It, does help me; to push more.

(Also, United States English; is so confusing)

Serjustin19

Update

This poll, is no longer good. The part with AD poll, is still valid and correct. But been slight, change of plans. I had to cut my ties with EP short.

First and Foremost, I'm very happy that EP. Not, mind me visiting for while. Even though my visit, was very short. (4 months about)

I was also, very glad to help them. Get Emp and spent some time there. It was a heavy heart, that I must. End my time in EP now.

I was originally going back. To AD, in next campaign reset (8 days left in Vivec) Even though, I still believe. I'm not ready to go back AD.

however, change of plans with that to. I will not be serving in Vivec for while. At this time, High Priestess Emily. Will once again. Help DC in Shor, Started 5:00PM PDT yesterday.

I received 2, PSN messages. to come to Shor yesterday. DC is really hurting bad, both say. I checked for myself, at 5:00 PM PDT yesterday.

I also, wanted to learn more about this campaign. (DC wise) Even though I prefer Vivec. Due to Scourge wise, reminds me of Scourge at least.

So this is why, I be helping DC. In Shor instead, least for while. I also believed, I confused both EP and AD. (Ones from Vivec) I don't think they remember me having a DC.

It’s time to visit DC once more. While High Priestess Emily, be in service once again. Sorry, for sudden change of plans. But balance is more important.

SelfTherapy

None Of The Above

Or just stick to one alliance. AD is full of templars that heal themselves to death, EP, no comment, DC, the greatest.

Serjustin19

UPDATED Comment, 15

I, have been in Shor for 3 days. 2 on Blue, of which 3Rd day. I have switched to EP, since I believe. They need my help more. At same time it also has cause me some trouble.

I was, originally going back to AD. During next Vivec Reset, but the more I; thought about it in Shor. I'm still not ready to help AD, no offense. Hence I was suggested to help DC in Shor. Atleast, for the time being.

Until I felt ready for sure, to aid AD once more. Both when I'm ready for sure and score wise together. Eventhough my strong belief to aid EP in Shor. Other blues disagree, with my choice. For example 2 messages of 1 DC.

I do agree with DC opinion as, I also agree with AD advice to. Via another message, to 1 AD I know in Shor. But this is why, I only stay in 1 campaign. Especially, a campaign I don't know anything about.

For time being I will stay in Shor. To aid whom ever I can, (EP) that seem hurting most. (Not AD yet) However, Vivec is my main home campaign. Even though Shor, is my guest. I can see what's going on in Vivec, least the Score and notifications.

I screen captured the message and block names. But was it my best, course of action. To move to EP in Shor, a campaign I don't know. Nothing about, or I should've stayed in Vivec and bite the Turnips. In Next Vivec Campaign Reset to aid AD. For that I do not know the answer.


Please note, the colors represent. There respective Alliances. (Yellow=AD. Blue= DC)




online safety pics

Serjustin19

One simply must ignore the ones. Whom told you to go back to the reds. (Vivec/Shor) Whom also told you to go back to blues.(Shor) After you refused to go back to reds and then the blues. One simply must understand "certain someones" "they", whom apply rule to the whole alliance.

They don't understand they need help. They (certain someone's) don't rule the whole alliance. They don't speak for everyone. One must simply ignore that they are so blinded. They should be grateful. a veteran of that alliance, is back and willing to help with balance once more.

But one must not fight for his alliance. Since also technicaly, it is considered his alliance; since he been there longer. However, Even it may be his alliance. One must not FIGHT FOR his alliance. Since he not ready to do so.One must simply FIGHT FOR Balance instead on his former Alliance in Vivec PS4 EU. One must simply ignore certain negative Eagle's. No offense..............................................................................


Updated 10-30-17

In Which I did do my best. To help aid AD in 5th Vivec Campaign? But I'm still unable to stay on AD. So I went back to EP on 2ND or 3Rd day of 5th Vivec Campaign. I'm unable to go back AD due to reasons. I will also ignore help if the rumors are true in Next Vivec Campaign Reset. Least do my best to ignore help. I don't want to go back and forth. For now I be continuing to stay EP.

Zbigb4life

Ever considered a psychiatrist ???

Serjustin19

Zbigb4life wrote: »

Ever considered a psychiatrist ???

I know it's kinda private and personal no offense. But I think you where joking with the emotes. But yes I have been paid visits to psychiatrist. All they do is give me meds.

I do take em, but for my ADD, ADHD and Bipolar. Another for depression and anxiety. But no one is perfect. Thanks for checking on me though.

I really love everyone on each alliance. I really do We are all a new family. Have interests of what we like and point of views. I guess it's Allright if we do have a falling out in a certain server,Campaign and platform (AD)

But still not right for certain someones to give me a hard time in zone when I really want to do is help with balance. I really need to work on others to revive me though. Just need work but all be good. I mean reds used to do that to, not revive me. But they got used to me.

kynseon

interesting