Lets talk about people.

Weasel_Tunneler

You and me, we both have different taste for many things, we could agree and disagree with certains things, we are all different and thats why make the world a "nice" place to live in (excluding other things that make it bad of course)

By knowing this, you also MUST know that no one is able to read your mind, and that certains things that may drive you mad, would be ok for someone else, so thats why you MUST tell someone that the thing one person said to you is embarassing, immoral, nasty whatever you think it is. You live in a world where people have different taste to everything and if you feel like someone said something you didn't like, please DO tell them, him/her about it and explain as to why you don't like it, if them, him/her respects you then they, he/she will stop it and say "sorry/pardon me/I'm sorry for bothering you".

By doing this, you are helping someone to become better in life, you are helping this guy or this girl to become a better person each day. But if you simple decide to punish someone, get mad by someone, hit someone, call out someone and the person ask you "Why are you doing it" and you REFUSE to tell them, he/she what caused you to behave, to act, to do what you did is just stupid, you aren't helping anyone, you are actually making it even hard for someone else see the who is wrong in the story, like I said, no one can read your mind thus no one knows what they he/she thinks would be bad to say, to do.

And i'm saying this because sometimes people get mad by very little things and refuse to explain what is wrong, they simple decide to attack without any warning, the person of course being attacked will not understand a thing and get frustated.

So when you get kicked from a guild and you try to ask why you were kicked and the leader simple says that "No explanation required" this just make me sad, if I did something wrong, how would I know? How can I grow up as a better person if I cannot learn my mistakes? Please, dont do it, give in a explanation as to why you decided that person had to go, do not just boot people from somewhere without any single warning.

Tabbycat

If that was your ex-guild leader's response to your inquiry, perhaps he was doing you a favor by removing you from the guild.

It's best to just remove yourself from guild drama whenever possible.

SirAndy

Tabbycat wrote: »

It's best to just remove yourself from guild drama whenever possible.

Also, don't take CP160 set items from the guild bank just to deconstruct them to level your craft.
Seriously, please don't ...

BRogueNZ

Depends on how you look at things I guess.
People have their reasons and opinions, personally I'm not wasting much thought as to why people think or feel the way they do. I don't expect people to care what I think and I try my best to be open minded enough allow them the same liberty.


reading it again, I probably missed your main point re the guild and decided to ramble

Weasel_Tunneler

BRogueNZ wrote: »

Depends on how you look at things I guess.
People have their reasons and opinions, personally I'm not wasting much thought as to why people think or feel the way they do. I don't expect people to care what I think and I try my best to be open minded enough allow them the same liberty.

If someone say something you didn't like and you get mad at them before giving them a chance to say sorry and also refuse to tell them what made you mad, you aren't right.

Now, if you already told them that X thing makes you mad, even after the warning they still keep on it over and over and over, then they are wrong and you have the rights to stay mad, call them out or kick them.

Betheny

If it's a trade guild then it's because you didn't sell enough/didn't pay dues.

If it's a social guild then PM someone you're in contact with in the guild and see if you can get a clue on what you were doing wrong, but only so you can learn from it (don't bother trying to get back in, having guild leader that doesn't like you isn't going to work).

If it's a social guild and you can't PM anyone because you're in contact with nobody at all then it's that

vyndral13preub18_ESO

Nah, somethings dont have to be explained. It is a common sense.

If i went up to my guild master and was like hey lets cyber! Ill be dad and you be my little pumpkin just getting home from a bad day at school and you need a spanking! I would deserve anything that came. They might laugh. We might get our cyber on! I might get reported. I might get thrown out of the guild. All are common sense possibilities.

Using the same example this post might be seen as offensive enough that the forum police crack the whip. They might warn me, they might ban me, the might do nothing at all. But me claiming I didnt know i was being offensive, is just me trying to be a *** and get away with it. Because somethings are common sense.

Oh, i wasnt suppose to take all the gold out of the guild bank and use it to make the equipment of me and the first 5 people to respond in chat, gold? No one told me! How unfair! Why are you not trying to make me a better person!!!??

Wrecking_Blow_Spam

Or how about when you're in a large guild - 500 cap with at least 150 online in prime times, I message the leader asking a question and they completely blank you....
Even though the guild description says " if any enquiries please message X or X" (guild master and co leader) I messaged them over a month ago and both blanked me.
It's worth noting I saw one in cyro (we both red) I saw him die and gave him a nice friendly teabag, not like he knows who I am anyway.

Weasel_Tunneler

vyndral13preub18_ESO wrote: »

Nah, somethings dont have to be explained. It is a common sense.

If i went up to my guild master and was like hey lets cyber! Ill be dad and you be my little pumpkin just getting home from a bad day at school and you need a spanking! I would deserve anything that came. They might laugh. We might get our cyber on! I might get reported. I might get thrown out of the guild. All are common sense possibilities.

Using the same example this post might be seen as offensive enough that the forum police crack the whip. They might warn me, they might ban me, the might do nothing at all. But me claiming I didnt know i was being offensive, is just me trying to be a *** and get away with it. Because somethings are common sense.

Oh, i wasnt suppose to take all the gold out of the guild bank and use it to make the equipment of me and the first 5 people to respond in chat, gold? No one told me! How unfair! Why are you not trying to make me a better person!!!??

I'm not putting common sense in this thread, but talking how people choose to just act without a warning because it seems easy to just boot than explaning why.

SydneyGrey

Weasel_Tunneler wrote: »

I'm not putting common sense in this thread, but talking how people choose to just act without a warning because it seems easy to just boot than explaning why.

True. It might have just been laziness why he didn't give you a reason for being booted. Some people are just lazy and inconsiderate.

Or, for all you know, he could have booted you so he could add a couple of his buddies.

srfrogg23

Weasel_Tunneler wrote: »

You and me, we both have different taste for many things, we could agree and disagree with certains things, we are all different and thats why make the world a "nice" place to live in (excluding other things that make it bad of course)

By knowing this, you also MUST know that no one is able to read your mind, and that certains things that may drive you mad, would be ok for someone else, so thats why you MUST tell someone that the thing one person said to you is embarassing, immoral, nasty whatever you think it is. You live in a world where people have different taste to everything and if you feel like someone said something you didn't like, please DO tell them, him/her about it and explain as to why you don't like it, if them, him/her respects you then they, he/she will stop it and say "sorry/pardon me/I'm sorry for bothering you".

By doing this, you are helping someone to become better in life, you are helping this guy or this girl to become a better person each day. But if you simple decide to punish someone, get mad by someone, hit someone, call out someone and the person ask you "Why are you doing it" and you REFUSE to tell them, he/she what caused you to behave, to act, to do what you did is just stupid, you aren't helping anyone, you are actually making it even hard for someone else see the who is wrong in the story, like I said, no one can read your mind thus no one knows what they he/she thinks would be bad to say, to do.

And i'm saying this because sometimes people get mad by very little things and refuse to explain what is wrong, they simple decide to attack without any warning, the person of course being attacked will not understand a thing and get frustated.

So when you get kicked from a guild and you try to ask why you were kicked and the leader simple says that "No explanation required" this just make me sad, if I did something wrong, how would I know? How can I grow up as a better person if I cannot learn my mistakes? Please, dont do it, give in a explanation as to why you decided that person had to go, do not just boot people from somewhere without any single warning.

Sounds like they did you a favor by booting you. People like that can be a real drag. They're too needy.

Rohamad_Ali

Some people are so afraid of any possible confrontation they refuse to do any of those things and you are correct , it does not help anyone to grow personally . Then again , there are some here that have little regard for anyone unless they are complacent yes men agreeing with every statement . I have little regard for any of them myself . My best friends I met through confrontations .

BRogueNZ

Weasel_Tunneler wrote: »

BRogueNZ wrote: »

Depends on how you look at things I guess.
People have their reasons and opinions, personally I'm not wasting much thought as to why people think or feel the way they do. I don't expect people to care what I think and I try my best to be open minded enough allow them the same liberty.

If someone say something you didn't like and you get mad at them before giving them a chance to say sorry and also refuse to tell them what made you mad, you aren't right.

Now, if you already told them that X thing makes you mad, even after the warning they still keep on it over and over and over, then they are wrong and you have the rights to stay mad, call them out or kick them.

If this all about guild relations or online interactions, why let it get to you? does it really matter? why stress about essentially nothing? being offended or angered is a choice not a condition.

BRogueNZ

*your favourite spiritual entity here* ..grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference.

Enslaved

World was not ment to be nice place. Guilds are not nice places either. Ppl feel entitled to so many things in every aspect of life. Misery transfer is almost a national sport to some ppl.
I guess that is why so many ppl tend to play alone, even if in a MMORPG such as ESO.

JWKe

From what context do you say this? Some wrongs people know they did but refuse to acknowledge it rather for whatever reason is waiting for the person offended to verbally say "you hurt me because you did so and so."

From my pov theres nothing wrong with totally cutting connection off with someone that is toxic. Also, if the wrong that person cause is apparent and obvious no words have to be spoken (e.g. someone stealing the treasure chest you just killed the mobs for, stealing a bunch of high valued items from the guild bank) and if a person does not know that doing such things might cause some form of social abrasion that person has a lack of social skills in essence (socially regg tart).

Again, it's contextual. What past contact did you have with your guild leader? What actions did you do prior to you being booted?

Sometimes it could also just be chance... your name somehow by a stroke of bad luck appeared to be the spot where your guild leader accidentally pointed his cursor too and by accident kicked you. Being that it's a 500 people guild you're probably just then a number and so was kicked and unfortunately the guild leader does not have a database where he stores the names of all members and so did not invite you back.

AJ_1988

I once took a 3 month break and when I come back the guild had marked me as a thief for stealing from the bank. ( apparently I had magic powers or something) when the only things I took out were useless bits and pieces and replaced them with the fotm/powerful set items. They lost them selves a lot of gold from my sales so I ended up just laughing at them not knowing how to check logs lol. It was just pretty low to label me a thief when I hadn't been online for months during the apparent time of theft.

Turelus

You know, I kind of feel the OP must have some idea what they did.
Even if they don't think it was offensive or warrants a kick they have to know an action they took in the last week which would cause this.

Rohamad_Ali

Turelus wrote: »

You know, I kind of feel the OP must have some idea what they did.
Even if they don't think it was offensive or warrants a kick they have to know an action they took in the last week which would cause this.

That's an assumption . I know a person that was kicked from a guild and they never said a word or took anything from a guild bank . No reason was ever given . Some players are just plain weird .

Turelus

Rohamad_Ali wrote: »

Turelus wrote: »

You know, I kind of feel the OP must have some idea what they did.
Even if they don't think it was offensive or warrants a kick they have to know an action they took in the last week which would cause this.

That's an assumption . I know a person that was kicked from a guild and they never said a word or took anything from a guild bank . No reason was ever given . Some players are just plain weird .

Okay sure, but they don't state that in their thread.

They speak (write) more as if they know they did something and rather than being told they upset someone and having the chance to say sorry they were kicked.

Rohamad_Ali

Turelus wrote: »

Rohamad_Ali wrote: »

Turelus wrote: »

You know, I kind of feel the OP must have some idea what they did.
Even if they don't think it was offensive or warrants a kick they have to know an action they took in the last week which would cause this.

That's an assumption . I know a person that was kicked from a guild and they never said a word or took anything from a guild bank . No reason was ever given . Some players are just plain weird .

Okay sure, but they don't state that in their thread.

They speak (write) more as if they know they did something and rather than being told they upset someone and having the chance to say sorry they were kicked.

"So when you get kicked from a guild and you try to ask why you were kicked and the leader simple says that "No explanation required" this just make me sad, if I did something wrong, how would I know? How can I grow up as a better person if I cannot learn my mistakes? Please, dont do it, give in a explanation as to why you decided that person had to go, do not just boot people from somewhere without any single warning."

I read that as they didn't have a clue and were sad for not being given any explanation .

Turelus

Rohamad_Ali wrote: »

Turelus wrote: »

Rohamad_Ali wrote: »

Turelus wrote: »

You know, I kind of feel the OP must have some idea what they did.
Even if they don't think it was offensive or warrants a kick they have to know an action they took in the last week which would cause this.

That's an assumption . I know a person that was kicked from a guild and they never said a word or took anything from a guild bank . No reason was ever given . Some players are just plain weird .

Okay sure, but they don't state that in their thread.

They speak (write) more as if they know they did something and rather than being told they upset someone and having the chance to say sorry they were kicked.

"So when you get kicked from a guild and you try to ask why you were kicked and the leader simple says that "No explanation required" this just make me sad, if I did something wrong, how would I know? How can I grow up as a better person if I cannot learn my mistakes? Please, dont do it, give in a explanation as to why you decided that person had to go, do not just boot people from somewhere without any single warning."

I read that as they didn't have a clue and were sad for not being given any explanation .

Sure they don't have a clue, but they didn't say "I haven't spoken or acted out in any way" for all we know the OP was making racial jokes thinking it was funny but didn't feel like adding that side of the story.

Just playing devils advocate I guess, but I find it strange to be removed then come to the forums complaining and not have any idea what you did at all to be removed. The guild leaders reply implies that the OP should know what they did, meaning they would have been active and not a silent/non-partaking member.

Weasel_Tunneler

Turelus wrote: »

Rohamad_Ali wrote: »

Turelus wrote: »

Rohamad_Ali wrote: »

Turelus wrote: »

You know, I kind of feel the OP must have some idea what they did.
Even if they don't think it was offensive or warrants a kick they have to know an action they took in the last week which would cause this.

That's an assumption . I know a person that was kicked from a guild and they never said a word or took anything from a guild bank . No reason was ever given . Some players are just plain weird .

Okay sure, but they don't state that in their thread.

They speak (write) more as if they know they did something and rather than being told they upset someone and having the chance to say sorry they were kicked.

"So when you get kicked from a guild and you try to ask why you were kicked and the leader simple says that "No explanation required" this just make me sad, if I did something wrong, how would I know? How can I grow up as a better person if I cannot learn my mistakes? Please, dont do it, give in a explanation as to why you decided that person had to go, do not just boot people from somewhere without any single warning."

I read that as they didn't have a clue and were sad for not being given any explanation .

Sure they don't have a clue, but they didn't say "I haven't spoken or acted out in any way" for all we know the OP was making racial jokes thinking it was funny but didn't feel like adding that side of the story.

Just playing devils advocate I guess, but I find it strange to be removed then come to the forums complaining and not have any idea what you did at all to be removed. The guild leaders reply implies that the OP should know what they did, meaning they would have been active and not a silent/non-partaking member.

I never said any racial jokes. Maybe because I used of badwords when talking, maybe people felt offended by it (some people take badwords REALLY too serious) and by the time no one told me that I should try to minimize my words it was too late.

I tend to swear a lot during talking (usually when i'm around friends talking no sense just for fun) when I'm with people i dont know or feel too comfortable I'll act indifferent till I feel comfortable.

Nestor

Unless I think someone is going out of their way to directly irritate me or disrespect me, I ignore things that might be taken as a slight in different contexts.

Reason, I don't have body language, or if not on Discord/TS, tonal inflections to gauge the mood and intentions of another person. Text is a difficult medium to be funny or sarcastic in, especially in the environs of a game where you don't have time to compose a reviewed response.

Besides, I don't want drama in my game. I have enough of that in my life. I avoid drama if I can, ignore it if I can't, and log off if it's chasing me around.

apostate9

Enslaved wrote: »

World was not ment to be nice place. Guilds are not nice places either. Ppl feel entitled to so many things in every aspect of life. Misery transfer is almost a national sport to some ppl.
I guess that is why so many ppl tend to play alone, even if in a MMORPG such as ESO.

You're projecting.