Bloody Journal (Vampire Story)

Krist

forums.elderscrollsonline.com/en/discussion/210714/jerrin-bloodlette-origin-story#latest

Journal Entry, Undated

I will not keep this journal as a time line, one must understand time has little meaning to one in my cursed state. After losing my beloved to the blood lust I wondered many decades alone, and I must confess, happy to do so. Palina was my wife, taken from me by my own kind. This is something I cannot forgive.
I remember the love I had for my dear Palina, but can no longer feel it within my cold soul. Whatever devil caused this curse, may he or she be cursed even more. To remember love but no longer able to feel it is a torture to one such as me. I know some embrace this aspect of our existence, however, I find it just lessons us. Our passions, if we had any in life, slowly begin to fade. The objects of our affections made us who we are, so we begin to lose not only others that we held dear, but eventually lose ourselves to this disease. While the objects of our affections disappear, the object of our infections begin to dominate. Blood soon becomes the only thing we seek. Blood becomes the ......*ink is smeared badly*

New Entry

I killed the bakers son this night, his blood warms me even as I write. It may be my undoing that I journal this, but it is necessary that I do so to keep my own sanity. The baker was my friend, as much as I may have one, and never asked me why I would only shop from him late in the eve. He figured me eccentric, and always held me for a time to indulge his need for good conversation, as he said. His son was a strong young man, near adult if not already young adult. He paid little mind to his father, as his father told me, always seeking the ladies. The baker seemed proud of his son's conquests, as if he thought that made his son somehow a real man. The baker himself was not married, his wife having passed due to illness some year before. The boy would be in and out of the shop as his father and I discussed the mountains of Skyrim or the Black Marsh, all of which I visited in my early years as a vampire. I did not tell him, but I visited all of these places as I hunted the demon that turned me into this creature, and killed my wife.
I had no intent to kill the baker's son. It was not by scheming. I stayed at the bakery far into the night, the man drinking his wine and telling me tales of his own love and life before she was taken from him. In some morbid way, I enjoy these stories, as it somehow makes me feel as if I am not alone. I waited too long this eve to feed, and as I hurried from the bakery I caught the scent of a mortal. I allowed myself to indulge, as it was time now. I cannot say exactly how it occurred, only brief memories of stalking the young man into the alley of the baker's shop, and there I drank my fill until his heart stopped. It is exhilarating, and very intoxicating. While I could have more control and not destroy the mortal, I choose not to let them live and suffer my own fate. As my own senses came back to me completely, it was then I saw it was my friend's son. I cannot say I would not have drank his blood otherwise, I can say regret set in immediately. I removed any evidence of my feeding, and fed the boy's body to crocodiles near the river. It was a risk, because dawn was not far off, and the journey was time consuming. However, I could not let the baker find his son in such a state. Better to let him think the boy left for adventure of some sort. I will return to my friend a few more times, and listen to his grief and wonder of what happened to his son. I will provide the heart's avenue that his son is alive and well, and leave him at least with that hope.

Krist

I was followed early this evening. It was a strange feeling, as usually people seem to not notice me. It is something do to with the curse, I am sure, but I can become very discreet at times. It is not any kind of form of invisibility, as I have heard some mages can accomplish, but it is apparently a skill none the less.
I was in the market, before the stalls closed. I rather appreciate the small stalls, they offer wares that the stores cannot or will not. I noticed a movement that the natural eye of mortals probably could not detect. It was slight, it was silent, but it was there.
It was one such as me, of this I had no doubt.
I let my eyes casually flow to the spot my peripheral vision picked it up at, and I understood it was gone. However, I also understood, from some part deep within my undead instincts, that it wished me see it.
As I write within this journal I cannot help but glance up now and again to insure I am truly alone within my sanctum sanctuary. I have spent many years now avoiding those like me, and I choose to not involve myself in their games and plans. We are immortal, and the mortal world passed me by long ago.
Yet, still, something within me stirs. I take a moment to evaluate this thing gnawing at me that is not quite a feeling, but cannot be described in any other way. The candle I just lit is completely burned by the time I conclude that I have no reason to care if another vampire or even one of their conclaves are near. If I do determine they are, then I will do as always, and simply move on.

*quickly scribbled* Yet still, something within

Krist

New Entry

It has been a bit since I have written, as much has been going on. I met the vampire that was watching me. He is young in appearance, but older than I. He said that he was in some way related to Count Verandis of Ravenwatch, though of course I have no way of knowing this for certain. He has blonde hair, which is stark difference from Verandis, whom I have seen, though not really met. I am sure the lasses would find the young man handsome, and he is well built, though not like a stocky fighter or broad shouldered knight. More like a runner, or even a swimmer. He told me his name was long forgotten, to simply call him Seguriul. He was an Imperial, which lead me to doubt his relation to Verandis.
He was intriguing none the less.

Segurial told me that he was turned into a vampire when he was only 17 years of age, a young boy living in Cyrodiil at the time of the reign of Versidue Shaie. That puts him somewhere in the early common era or late 1st era, when Tamriel was ruled by a snake man. This alone peeked my interest, as we spoke for hours on how things were different. I have read many tomes of these times, but to speak to one who lived in it was amazing. He said times were much harder for vampires when he was turned, or so at the time it felt so. They were not tolerated in any setting, and certainly none would be considered for the position of Duke. He looked a bit disappointed when I said I was really not interested in the times of vampires, I was more interested in how the lives of mortals were.
These stories, they simply held and peeked my interest.
His smile returned and he told me of the life and times. It was getting late into the night, and neither of us had fed. He told me that he could not tolerate the sun light, in any aspect, and that he would need to go. I know there are vampires that cannot stay in the sun, but I do believe he is the first I have really spoken with. I personally can stand the sun, but it greatly diminishes me, and I much much prefer to stay from it. The best a mortal can understand is that it gives me the feeling of having Brain Rot. I hear there are others that are nearly unaffected by the sun, but feel much stronger at night.
I cannot imagine burning up like a torch, though, simply because the sun touches my skin.

New Entry

I hunted several times with Segurial. He knew the best places to find the easiest prey. He was amazed that I would not feed on the good citizens of the cities, but that my prey was found in the underbelly of the world. Thieves, ***, murderers. It was not because of any honor that I choose them, it is because their deaths or them missing would not cause panic. They died violent deaths many times over, came up missing when wanted by law, or left for other cities without a word. Nothing was odd if they simply fell off the edge of Tamriel.
Sometimes Segurial would leave me, and find his own hunting grounds. He would tell me of a noble lass that he would seduce to be alone with him, or a rich store owner that wanted a lad in private.
"They drink fine wine, and only eat the very best of the fatted calf Jerrin, you really do not know what you are missing," he would tell me. I must admit I was intrigued, as he described the taste was far different. Still, I refused. I warned him this would be of no good consequence to him, then he pointed out how much older he was. That was fair enough, as he was very correct. However, I pondered if maturity was furthered since the body no longer aged. He seemed in many ways my younger brother, not my elder.
Segurial brought me to his hidden lair. It appeared simply as a hollowed out cave, but he lead me deeper in, until he opened up a secret entrance. The stone itself rolled back, and there were arcane writings all over the wall before me. He removed something from his pocket that appeared as a key, but larger with runes covering it. Placing it in a carved out section of this stone door before us, it began to glow, and the stone door opened.
It was not outlandishly large, but it had several rooms squared out of the rock itself. Segurial said he did not create the place, it was probably here long before it belonged to Segurial. It belonged to another vampire at one time, and now was his.
I did not question further, as it appeared he did not wish to discuss this.
He had treasures that I had never seen before, and was rich enough to start his own kingdom it seemed. He explained that the treasure had no real meaning to him. I understood completely, as the riches of man have little meaning to the immortal vampire.
"When I leave here, I will leave this behind," Segurial told me, and I believed him completely. I asked what he meant by leave here, but he did not care to elaborate, saying that some secrets are best kept to ones self. Again, this I understood completely.

Krist

New Entry

The town was in an uproar tonight, there was a vampire about. People were talking in whispers about it, though my excellent hearing could pick it up. I had not seen Segurial in a few days now, and somehow I know this is his doing. I should have moved on sooner, as soon as I saw him in the market place. I should never have let myself become friends with him, because now I worry for his safety. I have little time for writing, I must get back to town this evening and attempt to locate him. If I cannot, I shall go to his lair.

New Entry

I found Segurial. He was placed in the stockades in the middle of town. Under him attached to a post was a sign that read "He said he is not the vampire, we shall see in the morning". He did not see me though, as I covered my head with the hood of my cloak. It was a night with a cool breeze so it did not seem odd, as many others covered up as well.
I am coward, as I did nothing to try and free him. I fed, but there was no pleasure in it, as I thought of my friend awaiting his fate. He would burn up at the first rays of morning.

Krist

New Entry

I ventured out before I usually do, the rays of the sun were still creeping past the hills. It was uncomfortable, but could not be avoided. I needed to see. My shame was too great as I saw the ashen burned body of what was once my friend Seguirial. He was gone forever, a creature much older than I. I must interject that I had no real love, as a mortal may feel, for him. However, I will still call him friend because I enjoyed the conversations of times I knew nothing of. As a vampire cursed, I have lived many many years, and I study much of what is going on. This is why mortals bore me, there is not much they can tell me that I have not learned.
My shame stems from the fact that I did nothing to try and save him. It was not fear that kept me from it, it was simply inconvenient for me to do such. That I fear is part of the curse, or maybe I am this way because of the curse and my own losses. Either way, Segurial was gone. I tell myself it was by his own makings, something I warned him of and he refused listening. How he lived this long while being so reckless is beyond me. As I feel the air becoming cooler, the sun now fully set and the last pains of daylight quickly retreating to the horizon, I feel my hunger begin to build. I watched the people of the town walk by, barely noticing me, and never realizing the threat was far from over. I began to hunger, only increasing my shame, but all the while knowing I would feed on one of them later.

I am vampire.

Angelfire_Arisen

Another great work. I love the idea of using journal entries. I feel like self reflection as a vampire is contrary in a way, probably why I find it interesting.