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(Remained Opened, Due To Popular Demand) I Have Finaly Found What My Alliance I Truly Belong to

Serjustin19
Serjustin19
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UPDATED

I wrote this after switching back EP on 3RD Day of 3Rd Vivec PS4 EU Campaign. I put it in my signature bust I've realized most won't be able to see, I have written to 2 of 15 AD whom liked me and saying in 5 pages as to why I was going go back on 3RD day; as well as these letters where written on 2ND day before I went back EP. I will not show these letters since very long.

Thus on 3RD day I Updated my signature, some of EP asked me why am I here. As to that I have no response without a possibility of offending others. However I wrote in zone, "The reason why I here, I don't want to discuss the details of why I'm here" In which case EP took no offense which I was glad.


Yesterday however a 3rd AD (of the 15) whom liked me said " sorry" via psn. Then after that psn message, sent me another and asked me why did you "go back EP" I replied back "I strongly feel that I'm an outcast, rejected and unaccepted by majority of AD in Vivec. I been battling this in Scourge. I'm just grown tired of it, you can read my signature though. Your 1 of the 15 AD whom like me, but I don't want be accepted by handful. (PS4 is able to read signature and no need be sorry)"

About 15 minutes later another message "Ok, I understand. We should go fishing some time :)" In which I accepted and very grateful to go fishing later on. (I hope it's fishing in game, since where from 2 different countries)


So here is my signature as to why I went back EP on 3rd day of Vivec PS4 EU



Only Read If Your AD in Vivec PS4 EU (Or EP)



Why does Serjustin19 feels like an outcast to AD still. Why does Serjustin19 feel like Majority of AD not want Serjustin19 on AD,(save for about 15)Serjustin19 does not want to be accepted by 15 AD, Serjustin19 Wanted to be accepted by majority of AD.

Did AD forget that Serjustin19 helped AD in Scourge PS4 EU (eventhough he hated AD at the time, but then came and grew to love AD and still do, despite majority not want Serjustin19? Serjustin19 has grown tired of not being accepted by Majority of AD in Scourge, In Haderus and Vivec.

Why does Majority of AD dislike Serjustin19, save for about 15? Serjustin19 still wonders about this. Was it because of my past color that most of you still remember me past before I helped AD in Scourge? Was it because I was red for about 1 Week before I went to help you All?

Was it because it's because of that color, Red that made majority of AD dislike me, because EP took everything everyday with little force of AD. Was it because I was red before AD, that I was actually blamed for AD leaving in Scourge PS4 EU?

Did majority of AD ponder as to why I made a new Red (Jessica Fiery Fox Of Wind) (Which in turn Jessica fiery Fox, is the name of my fox mount, While my character name is Wind. Hence Jessica Firey Fox belongs to Wind as name entitles if you put both names together) 3 months before 2ND Scourge became deleted.


It’s because Majority of AD (save for 15 AD) is why Serjustin feels strongly that's he's been disowned, and an Outcast and still feels this way. Serjustin19 has grown tired of being called Orange and as to reason why made another EP to begin with.

Serjustin19 thought he found where his alliance truly is after he went back to EP for 30days, during the 2ND Vivec PS4 EU campaign reset. Serjustin19 worked so hard to do all the Aldmeri Dominion Quests and to get the only Alliance Story that he has done for 2+yrs.
As well as Serjustin19 felt that the quests spoke to him as he in awe.

But sure enough, when 3RD Vivec PS4 EU campaign reset came. Serjustin19 went back to AD with the DOMINION hero Title, but sure enough hardly AD was there. Only a few handful, about 20 of AD was there.

But still, even with the DOMINION hero Title Serjustin19 still got mistreated by the majority of AD whom was there, (save for 9 whom was kind for me to join group, minus some flaws, in which Guild leader was aware later.) Serjustin19 still got refused revives, where got to point I took off my Dominion Title and back Volunteer in shame.

On the 2ND Day, Serjustin19 ponderd where all of AD Gone? Was it because Serjustin19 wrote that he was going back to AD in the 3Rd Vivec Campaign Reset. Serjustin19 feels it his actually his fault and feels strongly as this is why hardly AD came once Serjustin19 was there. Especially like how he was actually blamed for AD leaving in Scourge PS4 EU.

Serjustin19 had his last straw of not being accepted, when he got pretend revives and teabags and all this repeat over and over again, while other AD whom was there did nothing but watch as a DC was laughing and watching as well.

While that same one quit and I know was writing in group, then continued, Then another AD whom I don't even know, did same thing after first one did, which I realized was in same group like the others I believe.

Majority of AD, in Vivec PS4 EU, I just wanted to say, you all have won, I'm tired of being shunned, I'm tired of being an outcast, I'm tired of being unaccepted, I'm tired of being Unwanted, especially I was the one whom wanted to help you AD in Scourge. I could've refused. But I didn't, I wanted to help.

As well as I could've join other campaigns, but no matter where I go, it's same issues. Others from Scourge still there in other campaigns whom not like me. But I will stay In Vivec PS4 EU. But I went back in the 3Rd day of 3Rd Vivec Campaign.

I went back to EP and sure enough Vivec was full again with AD. Hence I strongly believe, once again that I'm blamed, like before making a whole alliance leave. This is why I feel an outcast still and strongly feel unwanted no matter what I did to help and try to prove that I belong AD.


However I'm sorry for those 15 whom do like me on AD, but I grown tired of Majority of AD and not wanting me as well me fighting for me to be accepted. But now I see. I just wants best for AD. If it makes AD come back and doing very well. Then I must listen to the people and make a Sacrifice.

This is why I went back to EP, in 3rd Vivec PS4 EU. I believe my time for now (hopefully someday I can return) my time for the Aldmeri Dominion might have come to an End. My Journey for EP has only just begun. Until if and when I decide if my time to come back AD is right and welcome alas.

Good chance I will go back and forth AD to try and fix it, but good chance I will stay EP for long time, if I'm unable to fix majority of AD Alliance to finally accept me. I just don't want a handful to accept me. Thus I will stay EP for now, after all is it about time for me to help EP Now? I think it's time especially when I wasn't unable to still be accepted by majority.











It Was A Glorious 2+ years in Scourge PS4 EU, especially during both the 1st and 2nd Scourge. As well as my time in Haderus PS4 EU. What will my journey bring, during my time in Vivec, We shall wait; for my journey has only begun.




(Old)


Please Note: This was my original comment of what I wrote and left to different thread. "Which Alliance/Faction You Fight For And Why" It took me long time to write and very long, hence I
wanted to start my own thread of the comment I left. I'm so glad I know now where I belong.

I must apologize for being so long, but everything leads to this. I wanted to share and also very grateful for me helping EP, until I figured out of what I was searching for. I finally found out of where I turly belong. Here is link:

https://forums.elderscrollsonline.com/en/discussion/comment/4373698#Comment_4373698



Original Comment I left

My story is long, But I will keep it short as possible due to most of stuff of my journey allready been said in forum.

What I have not said, Was that my very first Alliance and the very alliance that I was actually loyal to (at the time, before I had quit originally due to forcibly need ESO +) I became AD, I had my reaons on why I have choosen to become AD on PC. Sadly as the years past until ESO came on PS4, I have forgotten of the reason on why I had choosen AD in the beginning.

At the time I was playing Destiny on the PS4, Later on ESO was about to be released. Yes I have stated that the only reason on why I bought ESO, was because of PvP. Of what I have not said was 2 other things that I kept hidden.

1. was being that I made friends on Destiny whom wanted to try out ESO on PS4 EU. The 2nd and other reason was it gotten to painful to play Destiny any longer. I used to had a person watch me play Destiny,everyday I was so happy especially when that someone whom was intersted to watch. That was until her passing, was when it felt so uncomfortable to play Destiny no longer.

So, my pre-order from Gamestop came for ESO on PS4, I downloaded the game and felt relieved; To put my mind out of sadness. There was also an option to move your character from PC to consoles. I messed up and put my PC Character to PS4 NA, instead of PS4 EU. But thus ends my AD Journey for now.

I restarted on PS4 EU, since my Destiny friends wanted to play DC, I joned my friends DC guild "Two Swords and Fist" I remember saying one time "wow your bank is really huge" My guild leader and friend laughed.

My original DC was named Princess Justine. Later on about 3 months or so, my friend's from Destiny had quit ESO, while Princess Justine and I went to 4 different guilds. Later on I hated AD (Please Note: I totally forgot I was AD originally on PC and PS4 NA, I just recently found out my PS4 NA character was from my PC; it's in one of the post I commented on. Of which it turned to help me remember.)

It got to the point that I hated AD so much (unsure why), that I helped EP destroying of what little of AD there was, with my DC. Going to PS4 2nd Scourge, Everything changed. It was then when I left DC (only 3 of my closests friends know why and understand on why I left DC)

So after I left DC, I went to EP (Guidence of EP Emp) I decided it was not right for me, after I met these 2 AD Kajit(?) These 2 AD Cats, kept destroying me over and over again. I was amazed and they made me remember I didn't like to have everything)

That was when I decided to became AD and to help AD, despite me hating AD at the time still; but what choice did I have? I don't want to have everything all the time with so little resistance of other alliance.

Move forward to middle of PS4 2nd Scourge, I grew to love AD. Sadly majority of AD not like me accept for 10 different AD. I felt I wasn't being accepted and others didn't wanted me on AD accept for select few. I got blamed for AD leaving. I was also still considered a red. I then went back to DC to try it again, sadly I couldn't Do It no offense.

I then went back to AD and tried to be acknowledged by others, sadly was still being considered red. It’s when i made new EP character 3 month before 2nd Scourge deletion

I did went back to AD since I was considered Yellow by EP (Makes sense) It got to the point it still not work out on AD. So I finished last few remaining weeks of 2nd Scourge as EP.

Moving to Haderus I became EP, I wanted to see what I'm missing on EP. My biggest regret, is that I messed up big time. I was continuing my bad behavior from 2nd Scourge PS4 EU. I went back AD off and on again, which I shouldn't have done in order to help me find out if I belong to EPor not.

Granted EP was also struggling, but I didn't stay much to help. (I was still considered EP on AD side, while I was considered AD on EP side) Haderus became deleted (given the short time of me being there)

Welcome To Vivec I replied to myself with solemn expression. I became AD this time ( I still was considered orange) It got to the point I jst had enough, I got so very tired of being called orange. it's when i put the matters in my very own hands and tried differint approach.

I went back to EP for about 1 week, To test myself if I can actually attack AD during that 1 week. It turns out that I could, but was very challenging for me to do so. I wanted to test because I was planning to be EP in next campaign (2nd campaign of Vivec; current campaign as of right now)

3days left of 1st campaign of Vivec, I went back to AD. I wanted to finish 1st Vivec Campaign on AD, so that way I could fully concentrate on being EP in the 2nd campaign of Vivec (Current) without me switching back to AD. Once for all I coud finally put this whole matter of what I had originally created in both 1st and 2nd Scourge, Haderus.(I shouldn't have left DC, But same time I was glad no offense) to rest.

Sadly I lost 2 friends (which included hate mail and threat of being banned) during the last 3 remaining days on AD. Now I have been serving 2nd (current campaign) on Vivec. not once have I ever went back to AD, I have fully stayed EP and will continue to do so far: until the campain resets that is in the next 8 days.

I have finaly found out the answer's that I was seeking and Sought after. Eventhough I have enjoyed helping EP, even if temporarily as well as joining a red guild (whom don't mind me playing differint alliances)

Because of me attacking AD for whole month and other reds responses, of which I'm thankful for. It is with great determination and effort. (as to the situation I caused from the very get go and originally my fault) as well as going offline mode and main AD to do certain quests (this be my first time ever since my 2+ yrs)

I have come to the very conclusion as well as me missing AD way so much. (Even though I was glad to visit EP for a month to find out which Alliance I belong to) I'm now not considered as Orange, but as a whole and as well as where I feel best belong to.

I now know that AD is truly my alliance all along and probaly forever be (except I might make an exception if an alliance is suddenly hurting, then I'll try to aid that hurting alliance, "DC and or EP" then I will go back AD when I'm able to)

So as of this current 2nd Campaign of Vivec PS4 EU, I will finish this current campaign on EP, (maybe leave half day earlier) once the next campaign resets, I will fully fledge my Allegiance as well as to my rightful Alliance to AD and as well as to Queen Ayrenn. (In which I hope Vivec will be still fully be balanced)

As it is fortold, as it should be, as of what I have learned. I have always went back to AD, no matter which Alliance I have served. I feel like that AD just kepis on calling me to go back. As with my given history of being AD originally on PC as well as forgetting that I originally was AD.

Including my History I could finaly put my mind to ease, and can't wait to serve AD once more in the next Campaign of Vivec. However must wait until campaign ends and or join AD half day earlier. Until the time comes for me to go back AD this is why AD as my Alliance and this is why I will fight for (If Vivec still balanced)
Edited by Serjustin19 on August 18, 2017 2:58PM
Formerly Serjustin19, Save for Forum Of Course.... Fiery_Darkness (PC NA) currently.
  • SugaComa
    SugaComa
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    So you getting destiny 2 ?
  • Serjustin19
    Serjustin19
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    SugaComa wrote: »
    So you getting destiny 2 ?

    I have honestly been thinking about getting it, but if I was going to buy it. I'll have to wait until after it's release, due to finical issues. At this time however and future, ESO will be my main MMO. (?).
    Formerly Serjustin19, Save for Forum Of Course.... Fiery_Darkness (PC NA) currently.
  • SugaComa
    SugaComa
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    I'm loving ESO, it's always been my in-between games game ... But as D2 approaches I feel less excited about D2 and more saddened to be putting ESO on hold for a while

    I just wish I had more friends willing to play both regularly, I hate coming back to ESO finding I've been removed from guilds and having to start making all new friendships

    I'm too loyal to be swapping guilds like this
  • Serjustin19
    Serjustin19
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    Updated above in original box
    Formerly Serjustin19, Save for Forum Of Course.... Fiery_Darkness (PC NA) currently.
  • Minnesinger
    Minnesinger
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    Right. So this epic story of faction hopping is finally coming to its end. I personally found this quite funny.
    The wind is cold where I live,
    The blizzard is my home,
    Snow and ice and loaded dice, the Wizard lives alone.
  • WillhelmBlack
    WillhelmBlack
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    wat
    PC EU
  • Serjustin19
    Serjustin19
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    Right. So this epic story of faction hopping is finally coming to its end. I personally found this quite funny.

    "forced" faction hopping. All I wanted was to help AD in 2ND Scourge, I could've refused as stated in update. I stayed AD for over a yr in 2ND Scourge. I been putting off going back EP and been trying to fix to get accepted. I could've not stayed AD, I could've went back EP and have everything with little amount of AD.

    But I stayed and been putting off and trying my best to ignore majority of AD, I thought I was doing the right thing to do my best to aid AD, but in turn I actually hurt AD. Otherwise I wouldn't been blamed for AD leaving in 2ND Scourge. It gone to point as stated in the update, it's reason why I was "Forced" to Alliance hopping in 3 months before 2ND Scourge deletion.

    Many times I did went back AD, as well as Haderus and 1st Vivec campaign. However 2nd Vivec Campaign I actually stayed whole 30 day on EP in Vivec. I been trying my best to fix and try to get accepted. But it just got to the point I had enough when returned back AD in 3Rd Vivec Campaign before I switched back to EP in 3rd day as stated.

    That was when no matter how much I tried, no matter how much I tried to prove to tell them that AD is my alliance. But in vain no matter what I do, Majority of AD won't listen. All I wanted to do was to get loved by the faction and by the majority of the faction.

    But yet only 15 accepts me, as well as I'm still an outcast, shunned by they very alliance whom I came to loved but yet not being accepted by the majority of AD. I believe I did deserve the respect and should be accepted by Majority of AD for me wanting to help aid AD.

    But turns out I was wrong. I just wish that someday I could return AD and finally be accepted by majority after all my time I been trying to fight for me being accepted by Majority. Hence why I was "Forced" to go back EP on 3Rd day of Vivec of 3rd campaign and I still on EP and haven't switch back.

    However it doesn't change the value that I still love AD nonetheless, I just wished Majority of AD would've seen this in 2ND Scourge. If I have been accepted by majority of AD in 2ND Scourge. I would've not made new EP character and I would've continued to stay AD to this day.

    But since I'm still not accepted by majority of AD is why I went back to EP in 3rd day on 3rd Vivec Campaign. Hence why I said and meant "forced" alliance hopping. I'm really glad you think it's funny though and thanks for being honest :smile:

    In conclusion I truly believe EP saw me not being accepted in 2ND Scourge with me on AD. In truth it's probably why EP has been nice to me in 2ND Scourge and even wanted to help me get Emp with there AD alts, since I was 2ND in place for EMP.

    As well when 1 EP told me "AD won't push for your Emp" EP was right, but I respectively declined the offer, as well as I believe not fair. But so far EP actually accepts me (except for small few) in 3Rd Vivec Campaign.
    Formerly Serjustin19, Save for Forum Of Course.... Fiery_Darkness (PC NA) currently.
  • Tillalarrien
    Tillalarrien
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    Edited by Tillalarrien on August 16, 2017 7:25PM
    Valkynaz of the Daedric Order
  • Ultimate_Overlord
    Ultimate_Overlord
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    @Tillalarrien *** you for making me comment and ruin my awesome/comment ratio feelsbadman
  • Tillalarrien
    Tillalarrien
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    what a "awesome" bait that was, man.. Ill resist the manipulation and give u "agree" instead xD
    Valkynaz of the Daedric Order
  • Jamini
    Jamini
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    This is, so incredibly hard to parse. Even so, why are you even posting this @Serjustin19 ?

    I doubt even a fraction of the folks on the forums really care what you are personally doing in PS4 Vivec, or why you are faction hopping. This sort of comment really belongs, at most, in the PS4 Vivec thread or just kept to your Private Messages or in-game chat. Airing it here is kinda silly at best, and worthless spam at worst.
    Only Read If Your AD in Vivec PS4 EU (Or EP)

    That isn't how public forums work.
    (Closed Due To Signature)

    That also isn't how public forums work. If you really want this closed, report your first post asking for a close or PM a mod.
    "Adapt. or Die."
  • geonsocal
    geonsocal
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    Always-mind-your-own-business.jpg
    PVP Campaigns Section: Playstation NA and EU (Gray Host) - This Must be the Place
  • Serjustin19
    Serjustin19
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    Jamini wrote: »
    This is, so incredibly hard to parse. Even so, why are you even posting this @Serjustin19 ?

    I doubt even a fraction of the folks on the forums really care what you are personally doing in PS4 Vivec, or why you are faction hopping. This sort of comment really belongs, at most, in the PS4 Vivec thread or just kept to your Private Messages or in-game chat. Airing it here is kinda silly at best, and worthless spam at worst.
    Only Read If Your AD in Vivec PS4 EU (Or EP)

    That isn't how public forums work.
    (Closed Due To Signature)

    That also isn't how public forums work. If you really want this closed, report your first post asking for a close or PM a mod.

    No, your right. It's true that a fraction of the forums don't care as you stated. But I just want to share my voice. My voice in the only way I know how. My voice that I'm little hurt as well as how much, I did to do my best to gain the approval. To finally be accepted, but I guess it was not meant to be.

    However it does not matter if my voice to others is being ignored, My voice is only meant for those whom are willing to read as well as to select few. Hence why I mean "Only Read If Your AD in Vivec PS4 EU (Or EP)" I don't want to waste others time, but I see I have.

    My message (voice) (signature in bold in update section) is only for Vivec PS4 EU as well as to mostly AD in that campaign and or EP. But not DC (unless if they so wish to read as to why I keep going back EP and AD)

    You say that my forum should be in Vivec thread, In a way I agree; but certain amount no offense. Yes I'm aware of another Vivec thread, but it's not mine as well as I don't want to steal other people thread.

    Eventhough there is another Vivec Thread, we are on different servers. As to why I want to start a new thread (I could made a new thread and put my old signature there, but decided to update to this thread instead, to tell them that AD is my alliance but as to why I was forced to go back EP)

    Sadly in horror, I'm starting to join zergs way more and if we see 2 or less AD I won't hesitate to go with zerg and destroy AD as well as those 2. At times I actually feel like teabag AD as well as certain others. But I'm forcing myself really hard to not do. I'm forcing myself to stop being in zerg to.

    I do love AD, but how long would my love for AD last? Until finally my sorrow would cloud my judgment before I Start hating AD once more? I hope it won't come to this. I hope I will still love AD after what I done to try my best to get accepted.

    But for now I will still keep AD posters hanging on my wall, as well as the only ones hanging on the wall. Hopefully someday I won't take them down. But for now it's helping me to keep few happy memories that I Have of my time serving AD. Hopefully my sorrow won't cloud my judgment as to hopefully someday I could come back.
    Formerly Serjustin19, Save for Forum Of Course.... Fiery_Darkness (PC NA) currently.
  • Serjustin19
    Serjustin19
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    @geonsocal

    As stated here

    "Sadly in horror, I'm starting to join zergs way more and if we see 2 or less AD I won't hesitate to go with zerg and destroy AD as well as those 2. At times I actually feel like teabag AD as well as certain others. But I'm forcing myself really hard to not do. I'm forcing myself to stop being in zerg to.

    I do love AD, but how long would my love for AD last? Until finally my sorrow would cloud my judgment before I Start hating AD once more? I hope it won't come to this. I hope I will still love AD after what I done to try my best to get accepted.

    But for now I will still keep AD posters hanging on my wall, as well as the only ones hanging on the wall. Hopefully someday I won't take them down. But for now it's helping me to keep few happy memories that I Have of my time serving AD. Hopefully my sorrow won't cloud my judgment as to hopefully someday I could come back."

    I think your the best person to ask. Since I can't do battle grounds (in PS4 help section) and or dungeons (in PS4 help section) and always in PvP. Since as well you play all 3. What advice can you give me if it's alright if I can ask.

    I want to continue to love AD, I don't want to hate AD like I used to. But stated above it's turning into hate, I want to stop this before it gets worse even when I'm on other side.

    I do love AD, but I'm starting to show signs of hate. I don't want this to happen I think my sorrow of not being accepted is clouding my judgment. Thanks in advance, I don't want it get worse. Sorry everyone to :(
    Formerly Serjustin19, Save for Forum Of Course.... Fiery_Darkness (PC NA) currently.
  • geonsocal
    geonsocal
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    @geonsocal

    As stated here

    "Sadly in horror, I'm starting to join zergs way more and if we see 2 or less AD I won't hesitate to go with zerg and destroy AD as well as those 2. At times I actually feel like teabag AD as well as certain others. But I'm forcing myself really hard to not do. I'm forcing myself to stop being in zerg to.

    I do love AD, but how long would my love for AD last? Until finally my sorrow would cloud my judgment before I Start hating AD once more? I hope it won't come to this. I hope I will still love AD after what I done to try my best to get accepted.

    But for now I will still keep AD posters hanging on my wall, as well as the only ones hanging on the wall. Hopefully someday I won't take them down. But for now it's helping me to keep few happy memories that I Have of my time serving AD. Hopefully my sorrow won't cloud my judgment as to hopefully someday I could come back."

    I think your the best person to ask. Since I can't do battle grounds (in PS4 help section) and or dungeons (in PS4 help section) and always in PvP. Since as well you play all 3. What advice can you give me if it's alright if I can ask.

    I want to continue to love AD, I don't want to hate AD like I used to. But stated above it's turning into hate, I want to stop this before it gets worse even when I'm on other side.

    I do love AD, but I'm starting to show signs of hate. I don't want this to happen I think my sorrow of not being accepted is clouding my judgment. Thanks in advance, I don't want it get worse. Sorry everyone to :(

    holy cow @Serjustin19 ...i don't think i've ever heard that kind of frustration from you before...

    I get it though - i remember getting kicked from a small AD pvp guild a while back...i totally understood the kick - if it's a pvp focused guild - those kind of guild masters don't want to look at the roster and see you playing another character on an enemy faction...

    still, afterward i went on an AD killing spree for a few days :p

    thankfully i haven't run in to too much trouble with my faction allies rezzing me - if they did pass me by a lot though - that would probably make me angry...i try to make sure to rez all my allies...

    currently i'm in two large guilds that have a a lot of people in the guild participating in pvp - i get a little nervous at times when i'm on an enemy faction character and i'm fighting my guilds faction - especially when i notice those players taking a bit of a closer look at my body...

    I'll be honest though - after going on that little AD killing spree i felt much better...

    as a solo pvp player - it feels good to be able to go out in to cyrodiil and simply fight and support for whatever faction you are playing at the time without any emotion or attachment to one particular faction or the players within it...

    it's a lot more relaxing and enjoyable that way...occasionally if i notice the game putting me in a bad or sad mood (like from being gated a lot, or, continually killed by large zergs) - i take some time to go farm resource nodes or do some quests...

    hopefully you can try to gather a small list of names from each faction that you know are nice and easy to get along with and when you go to pvp - try to message them for group...

    plying solo though is not for everyone...i would imagine for social people it would either be very boring or lonely...

    it's good though you are aware of how the game is making you feel...peace of mind and a happy feeling a very important to life outside of the game...

    Edited by geonsocal on August 18, 2017 10:07PM
    PVP Campaigns Section: Playstation NA and EU (Gray Host) - This Must be the Place
  • Serjustin19
    Serjustin19
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    geonsocal wrote: »
    @geonsocal

    As stated here

    "Sadly in horror, I'm starting to join zergs way more and if we see 2 or less AD I won't hesitate to go with zerg and destroy AD as well as those 2. At times I actually feel like teabag AD as well as certain others. But I'm forcing myself really hard to not do. I'm forcing myself to stop being in zerg to.

    I do love AD, but how long would my love for AD last? Until finally my sorrow would cloud my judgment before I Start hating AD once more? I hope it won't come to this. I hope I will still love AD after what I done to try my best to get accepted.

    But for now I will still keep AD posters hanging on my wall, as well as the only ones hanging on the wall. Hopefully someday I won't take them down. But for now it's helping me to keep few happy memories that I Have of my time serving AD. Hopefully my sorrow won't cloud my judgment as to hopefully someday I could come back."

    I think your the best person to ask. Since I can't do battle grounds (in PS4 help section) and or dungeons (in PS4 help section) and always in PvP. Since as well you play all 3. What advice can you give me if it's alright if I can ask.

    I want to continue to love AD, I don't want to hate AD like I used to. But stated above it's turning into hate, I want to stop this before it gets worse even when I'm on other side.

    I do love AD, but I'm starting to show signs of hate. I don't want this to happen I think my sorrow of not being accepted is clouding my judgment. Thanks in advance, I don't want it get worse. Sorry everyone to :(

    holy cow @Serjustin19 ...i don't think i've ever heard that kind of frustration from you before...

    I get it though - i remember getting kicked from a small AD pvp guild a while back...i totally understood the kick - if it's a pvp focused guild - those kind of guild masters don't want to look at the roster and see you playing another character on an enemy faction...

    still, afterward i went on an AD killing spree for a few days :p

    thankfully i haven't run in to too much trouble with my faction allies rezzing me - if they did pass me by a lot though - that would probably make me angry...i try to make sure to rez all my allies...

    currently i'm in two large guilds that have a a lot of people in the guild participating in pvp - i get a little nervous at times when i'm on an enemy faction character and i'm fighting my guilds faction - especially when i notice those players taking a bit of a closer look at my body...

    I'll be honest though - after going on that little AD killing spree i felt much better...

    as a solo pvp player - it feels good to be able to go out in to cyrodiil and simply fight and support for whatever faction you are playing at the time without any emotion or attachment to one particular faction or the players within it...

    it's a lot more relaxing and enjoyable that way...occasionally if i notice the game putting me in a bad or sad mood (like from being gated a lot, or, continually killed by large zergs) - i take some time to go farm resource nodes or do some quests...

    hopefully you can try to gather a small list of names from each faction that you know are nice and easy to get along with and when you go to pvp - try to message them for group...

    plying solo though is not for everyone...i would imagine for social people it would either be very boring or lonely...

    it's good though you are aware of how the game is making you feel...peace of mind and a happy feeling a very important to life outside of the game...

    Hi, thanks for reaching back thanks to understanding as well. By what your saying is that your alright now even after AD killing spree that your all calm know. Maybe that's what I need do but as days go by hopefully I can be calm. (I think that's what you mean)

    As to your in 2 large guilds, I can relate. I'm in 2 large guilds, but acceptes all. 1 is mostly AD as well as most from 2nd Scourge. The reason why I in because I'm friend of Guild Leader and Officer, (2 of the 15 whom like me as well as to all the 15 whom like me is in that guild.

    I was thinking of planning to leave the guild, but after seeing what you wrote I won't leave guild for now. However AD guild text chat is very active. The other guild is mostly Red, which I'm locked out of selling in guild store lol.

    I'm forced to be alone most of the time is because of my Internet. (I could however cut my neighbors huge tree and switch to a new IP Internet Provider that just came recently and very close to where I live. But they told me only way to get Internet from. Them is to cut neighbors tree. I won't do.)

    Alas a full Templar Healer is not supposed be alone,many good tips you have given me. I knew you where right one to ask, as well I'm grateful. I'll do my best to keep what you have written in mind. As to life outside of the game it's really funny and I guess awesome at same time. Maybe I'm still considered part of AD out of game due to pic? Least the Ad Sigil)

    PS_Messages_20170818_164747.jpg


    They where 3 days old when bought, took pic immediately once they got to there new home (where I live) (July 23) Now they are mostly grey. (I see if I'm able to take new pic later) As well as so many hawks, pheasants (birds) As well as Eagle's at times. (Including chickens and another Guinea Fowl Hen)
    Edited by Serjustin19 on August 19, 2017 12:37AM
    Formerly Serjustin19, Save for Forum Of Course.... Fiery_Darkness (PC NA) currently.
  • geonsocal
    geonsocal
    ✭✭✭✭✭
    ✭✭✭✭✭
    geonsocal wrote: »
    @geonsocal

    As stated here

    "Sadly in horror, I'm starting to join zergs way more and if we see 2 or less AD I won't hesitate to go with zerg and destroy AD as well as those 2. At times I actually feel like teabag AD as well as certain others. But I'm forcing myself really hard to not do. I'm forcing myself to stop being in zerg to.

    I do love AD, but how long would my love for AD last? Until finally my sorrow would cloud my judgment before I Start hating AD once more? I hope it won't come to this. I hope I will still love AD after what I done to try my best to get accepted.

    But for now I will still keep AD posters hanging on my wall, as well as the only ones hanging on the wall. Hopefully someday I won't take them down. But for now it's helping me to keep few happy memories that I Have of my time serving AD. Hopefully my sorrow won't cloud my judgment as to hopefully someday I could come back."

    I think your the best person to ask. Since I can't do battle grounds (in PS4 help section) and or dungeons (in PS4 help section) and always in PvP. Since as well you play all 3. What advice can you give me if it's alright if I can ask.

    I want to continue to love AD, I don't want to hate AD like I used to. But stated above it's turning into hate, I want to stop this before it gets worse even when I'm on other side.

    I do love AD, but I'm starting to show signs of hate. I don't want this to happen I think my sorrow of not being accepted is clouding my judgment. Thanks in advance, I don't want it get worse. Sorry everyone to :(

    holy cow @Serjustin19 ...i don't think i've ever heard that kind of frustration from you before...

    I get it though - i remember getting kicked from a small AD pvp guild a while back...i totally understood the kick - if it's a pvp focused guild - those kind of guild masters don't want to look at the roster and see you playing another character on an enemy faction...

    still, afterward i went on an AD killing spree for a few days :p

    thankfully i haven't run in to too much trouble with my faction allies rezzing me - if they did pass me by a lot though - that would probably make me angry...i try to make sure to rez all my allies...

    currently i'm in two large guilds that have a a lot of people in the guild participating in pvp - i get a little nervous at times when i'm on an enemy faction character and i'm fighting my guilds faction - especially when i notice those players taking a bit of a closer look at my body...

    I'll be honest though - after going on that little AD killing spree i felt much better...

    as a solo pvp player - it feels good to be able to go out in to cyrodiil and simply fight and support for whatever faction you are playing at the time without any emotion or attachment to one particular faction or the players within it...

    it's a lot more relaxing and enjoyable that way...occasionally if i notice the game putting me in a bad or sad mood (like from being gated a lot, or, continually killed by large zergs) - i take some time to go farm resource nodes or do some quests...

    hopefully you can try to gather a small list of names from each faction that you know are nice and easy to get along with and when you go to pvp - try to message them for group...

    plying solo though is not for everyone...i would imagine for social people it would either be very boring or lonely...

    it's good though you are aware of how the game is making you feel...peace of mind and a happy feeling a very important to life outside of the game...

    Hi, thanks for reaching back thanks to understanding as well. By what your saying is that your alright now even after AD killing spree that your all calm know. Maybe that's what I need do but as days go by hopefully I can be calm. (I think that's what you mean)

    As to your in 2 large guilds, I can relate. I'm in 2 large guilds, but accepts all. 1 is mostly AD as well as most from 2nd Scourge. The reason why I in because I'm friend of Guild Leader and Officer, (2 of the 15 whom like me as well as to all the 15 whom like me is in that guild.

    I was thinking of planning to leave the guild, but after seeing what you wrote I won't leave guild for now. However AD guild text chat is very active. The other guild is mostly Red, which I'm locked out of selling in guild store lol.

    I'm forced to be alone most of the time is because of my Internet. (I could however cut my neighbors huge tree and switch to a new IP Internet Provider that just came recently and very close to where I live. But they told me only way to get Internet from. Them is to cut neighbors tree. I won't do.)

    Alas a full Templar Healer is not supposed be alone,many good tips you have given me. I knew you where right one to ask, as well I'm grateful. I'll do my best to keep what you have written in mind. As to life outside of the game it's really funny and I guess awesome at same time. Maybe I'm still considered part of AD out of game due to pic? Least the Ad Sigil)

    PS_Messages_20170818_164747.jpg


    They where 3 days old when bought, took pic immediately once they got to there new home (where I live) (July 23) Now they are mostly grey. (I see if I'm able to take new pic later) As well as so many hawks, pheasants (birds) As well as Eagle's at times. (Including chickens and another Guinea Fowl Hen)

    thanks so much for sharing pic of your AD mascots :-)
    Awesome-Picture.jpg

    nature - in particular wildlife - definitely helps to keep the world in perspective...

    it's good that you seem to have a clearer idea concerning your place amongst the other pvpers on your server/platform...

    and, you are very right - a templar healer isn't really so much fun being alone...

    it's hard to find people with whom we can exchange thoughts, ideas and friendships...eso is an mmo...so, it's very hard to think of it as a solo activity...

    treasure and remember those with whom you are able to enjoy company...when it comes to sharing your time with others - quality is always better than quantity...
    PVP Campaigns Section: Playstation NA and EU (Gray Host) - This Must be the Place
  • Serjustin19
    Serjustin19
    ✭✭✭✭✭
    geonsocal wrote: »
    geonsocal wrote: »
    @geonsocal

    As stated here

    "Sadly in horror, I'm starting to join zergs way more and if we see 2 or less AD I won't hesitate to go with zerg and destroy AD as well as those 2. At times I actually feel like teabag AD as well as certain others. But I'm forcing myself really hard to not do. I'm forcing myself to stop being in zerg to.

    I do love AD, but how long would my love for AD last? Until finally my sorrow would cloud my judgment before I Start hating AD once more? I hope it won't come to this. I hope I will still love AD after what I done to try my best to get accepted.

    But for now I will still keep AD posters hanging on my wall, as well as the only ones hanging on the wall. Hopefully someday I won't take them down. But for now it's helping me to keep few happy memories that I Have of my time serving AD. Hopefully my sorrow won't cloud my judgment as to hopefully someday I could come back."

    I think your the best person to ask. Since I can't do battle grounds (in PS4 help section) and or dungeons (in PS4 help section) and always in PvP. Since as well you play all 3. What advice can you give me if it's alright if I can ask.

    I want to continue to love AD, I don't want to hate AD like I used to. But stated above it's turning into hate, I want to stop this before it gets worse even when I'm on other side.

    I do love AD, but I'm starting to show signs of hate. I don't want this to happen I think my sorrow of not being accepted is clouding my judgment. Thanks in advance, I don't want it get worse. Sorry everyone to :(

    holy cow @Serjustin19 ...i don't think i've ever heard that kind of frustration from you before...

    I get it though - i remember getting kicked from a small AD pvp guild a while back...i totally understood the kick - if it's a pvp focused guild - those kind of guild masters don't want to look at the roster and see you playing another character on an enemy faction...

    still, afterward i went on an AD killing spree for a few days :p

    thankfully i haven't run in to too much trouble with my faction allies rezzing me - if they did pass me by a lot though - that would probably make me angry...i try to make sure to rez all my allies...

    currently i'm in two large guilds that have a a lot of people in the guild participating in pvp - i get a little nervous at times when i'm on an enemy faction character and i'm fighting my guilds faction - especially when i notice those players taking a bit of a closer look at my body...

    I'll be honest though - after going on that little AD killing spree i felt much better...

    as a solo pvp player - it feels good to be able to go out in to cyrodiil and simply fight and support for whatever faction you are playing at the time without any emotion or attachment to one particular faction or the players within it...

    it's a lot more relaxing and enjoyable that way...occasionally if i notice the game putting me in a bad or sad mood (like from being gated a lot, or, continually killed by large zergs) - i take some time to go farm resource nodes or do some quests...

    hopefully you can try to gather a small list of names from each faction that you know are nice and easy to get along with and when you go to pvp - try to message them for group...

    plying solo though is not for everyone...i would imagine for social people it would either be very boring or lonely...

    it's good though you are aware of how the game is making you feel...peace of mind and a happy feeling a very important to life outside of the game...

    Hi, thanks for reaching back thanks to understanding as well. By what your saying is that your alright now even after AD killing spree that your all calm know. Maybe that's what I need do but as days go by hopefully I can be calm. (I think that's what you mean)

    As to your in 2 large guilds, I can relate. I'm in 2 large guilds, but accepts all. 1 is mostly AD as well as most from 2nd Scourge. The reason why I in because I'm friend of Guild Leader and Officer, (2 of the 15 whom like me as well as to all the 15 whom like me is in that guild.

    I was thinking of planning to leave the guild, but after seeing what you wrote I won't leave guild for now. However AD guild text chat is very active. The other guild is mostly Red, which I'm locked out of selling in guild store lol.

    I'm forced to be alone most of the time is because of my Internet. (I could however cut my neighbors huge tree and switch to a new IP Internet Provider that just came recently and very close to where I live. But they told me only way to get Internet from. Them is to cut neighbors tree. I won't do.)

    Alas a full Templar Healer is not supposed be alone,many good tips you have given me. I knew you where right one to ask, as well I'm grateful. I'll do my best to keep what you have written in mind. As to life outside of the game it's really funny and I guess awesome at same time. Maybe I'm still considered part of AD out of game due to pic? Least the Ad Sigil)

    PS_Messages_20170818_164747.jpg


    They where 3 days old when bought, took pic immediately once they got to there new home (where I live) (July 23) Now they are mostly grey. (I see if I'm able to take new pic later) As well as so many hawks, pheasants (birds) As well as Eagle's at times. (Including chickens and another Guinea Fowl Hen)

    thanks so much for sharing pic of your AD mascots :-)
    Awesome-Picture.jpg

    nature - in particular wildlife - definitely helps to keep the world in perspective...

    it's good that you seem to have a clearer idea concerning your place amongst the other pvpers on your server/platform...

    and, you are very right - a templar healer isn't really so much fun being alone...

    it's hard to find people with whom we can exchange thoughts, ideas and friendships...eso is an mmo...so, it's very hard to think of it as a solo activity...

    treasure and remember those with whom you are able to enjoy company...when it comes to sharing your time with others - quality is always better than quantity...

    Your very welcome :) here is updated pic of this morning. The 7 baby Guinea Fowl's as you can see is all gray now, as well as 3 Rhode Island Reds. They are all being accustomed so far now minus the other adult Guinea Fowl. Thanks for new advice as well :)

    DSC_0009.jpg
    DSC_0010.jpg
    Formerly Serjustin19, Save for Forum Of Course.... Fiery_Darkness (PC NA) currently.
  • Serjustin19
    Serjustin19
    ✭✭✭✭✭
    Greetings everyone, I just wanted to update my status.

    Last week was an incident and I quite blew, It made me leave My AD friend Mainly AD) Guild. Even though I did (wrote above) I would do my best to stay in that guild.

    But to no avail of what happened last week, I did blew and I thought I did was right to leave My friend Guild. After the incident, I thought it would be best to not write in advance as to reason why I left.

    After I left the Guild, I have lost that friend (Un befriended me) come to find out from my other AD friend and Officer of that guild. That my friend and guild leader was hurt that I left without saying anything, as to why he Un befriended me as well.

    Again, I thought I was doing the right thing to not say reason why I left. However I was so wrong and I messed up greatly. I should've wrote to my friend and guild leader. But I did post I will do my best to stay in guild in this forum thread. I should've sent him link also.

    I did wrote to my guild officer, which surprised she was still my friend. As well because she wrote on why I left, which I sent this link as to reason why I left the (mainly AD guild) However because of that incident I have learned something new.

    My friend and Officer reply was (* to missing stuff I deleted of incident) "Don't it's just game and some ppl are just stupid and feel strong because they * but I know it's always weak players do this ! Real good players don't *"

    Made me realize that she was right, as well as all this of me leaving guild could've been prevented. If I had only just written to both my Guild Leader and Officer after this incident of last weak.

    Because I blew and my mind was clouded, I did totally wrong thing. Yes I also felt guilty for leaving guild and even more so when I hurt my friend and guild leader feelings.

    However 3 days hence and after I got caught by 1 blue, while I was destroying 2 different outer walls on AD Drakelow. Whilst stuff was going through my mind and thinking things through.

    Of everything that has happened and what events lead to my demise, my demise of leaving guild. Including what my friend/ officer from that guild said.

    I decided to move a new step forward, to change my perspective on AD. To come to learn my past and how could've made things much better. But in order for me to move forward and take a step forward, as well as to change my perspective on AD and hopefully will stop cloud my judgment and mind.

    I had to do one thing and only one thing first. I wrote to my former friend and guild leader. I wrote 4 different messages on 4 different devices. But my 3Rd message got lost while,sending Sadly.

    I wrote as to why I left and because of the incident. That I was very wrong and I should've wrote in advance before I left guild and whole bunch of other things.

    However I'm proud to say my former friend and Former Guild Leader, accepted my apology with "You are one of my best friends in game, I accept your friend request. Hope that you inform me if it happens again, same with guildmembers who do mean against you. If you tell me things i can understand you better and help you better."

    I'm so happy and very amazed at his response, as to me very glad that he my friend again and I'm now back in his Guild. Even though we don't talk much after I left, I think he still hurt after what happened which I totally understand.

    It’s my fault, but hopefully with time; everything would be back to normal. But because of this incident last week with AD, as well as to leaving guild and losing a long time friend.

    Then re joining Guild and back friend, I'm starting to look at AD, in a whole new perspective; but in a good way mind you. I'm starting to feel more happy, even though it's not my time to go back AD due to reasons above.

    But the hatred I started to get for AD again, (1st time is above top thread?) It's starting to neutralize slowly but surely. Mostly thanks to what happened and what I have learned.

    I'm starting to see everything in whole new light and it's making me happy. I'm starting to enjoy myself more, starting to laugh when get destroyed by AD; calling out Certain AD names with pure amazement (thankful I not using mic on EP lol)

    Not to mention I'm starting sending messages to AD, congratulate on there build as to a much better Templar Healer than I as well as using restro like me but tanky!


    There was also some AD (about 5) whom gathered around me 2 days ago, destroyed me first though. Which they was forced to do. But it's what these AD did after wards made me in awe, and must admit made me little tear up (suck to be emotional sensitive, but good way)

    Now I'm unsure as to reason why these 5 AD did, that made me in awe. Was it because of my new lvl 10, EP Wood Elf Magicka Sorc? Was it because of my new lvl 10 EP name, "Dawn of New Beginning" or was it because all my 3 EP characters are all belong to certain alliance (2 Highelf and 1 Wood Elf)?

    Or was it because they finally saw I still love AD as to why my 3 EP Characters, are AD based? It’s really hard to say, but I can't help but wonder. Even in awe when they gathered around me after destroying me and all 5 AD gave a bow to me :)

    I was so amazed, why are these 5 AD doing this? I don't deserve this, especially after what I had done. Each and every day, my mind is becoming clear.

    In conclusion, do I still believe AD is my Alliance? Yes in my heart, especially what had happened and my past and my future. If AD is my Alliance, what would I do?

    Even though AD is my alliance, as well as in my heart. I don't believe it's the right time to go back at this time, I have come to realize maybe I needed a break from AD all along. But in good way mind you, mainly due to EP been my enemy for 2+yrs.

    Maybe because I feel it's fair for me to join EP, after the past incident on AD. Not to mention I been both DC and AD longer. I believe EP knows I'm AD at heart, but I also believe EP know I would go back to AD sometime in the future. In which case some EP have told me that they are very glad for me to visit, even if it's for short while.

    But also don't forget, By me on EP, I'm seeing AD in a whole new light. Each and everyday while I'm on EP in Vivec, I'm seeing so much wonderful things from AD.

    Even more so when my new hatred for AD is finally diminishing for good. My wish is that someday I could learn whole bunch of stuff On AD, from EP side.

    Someday when I return to AD for good, I'm unsure when. I will take everything from what I learned on EP side to AD side. I believe everything would be OK. But for now I will still be EP at this time.

    Without the incident happened last week and 3 days ago when the 5 AD gathered around me and bowed to me, there is highly good chance my new hatred for AD would've grown. But because of what had happened, I guess I could say these events is actually blessings in disguise.

    But to all of AD in Vivec PS4 EU (2ND Scourge, Haderus) As well as to all AD in the forum and other platforms, of what I said before. It was wrong and I' m very sorry for everything I have caused. even after what had happened, granted I was very upset.

    It’s all in the past now, I believe everything would be much better and even more so in future. Thank you each and everyone of you AD and really deeply sorry for everything. You all are awesome, many thanks. :)

    Edited by Serjustin19 on September 6, 2017 6:23PM
    Formerly Serjustin19, Save for Forum Of Course.... Fiery_Darkness (PC NA) currently.
  • geonsocal
    geonsocal
    ✭✭✭✭✭
    ✭✭✭✭✭
    when they gathered around me after destroying me and all 5 AD gave a bow to me :)

    I was so amazed, why are these 5 AD doing this? I don't deserve this, especially after what I had done. Each and every day, my mind is becoming clear.

    awwwwwww, that's awesome :) ...good story...

    yes, you are correct - communication is very important to any good relationship(s)...and, seeing how this is an mmo - that definitely holds true for this game...

    AD is you faction, EP is your faction, and if you were so inclined to choose - DC is your faction...zos gives you that gaming choice...

    what i've observed from a cross factional perspective is that those individuals whom do play more than a single alliance - generally have a much smaller group of pvp friends then those whom are faction loyalists...

    so, being a part of more than one alliance is cool - it just comes at a cost (in terms of socializing)...
    PVP Campaigns Section: Playstation NA and EU (Gray Host) - This Must be the Place
  • Icy_Waffles
    Icy_Waffles
    ✭✭✭✭✭
    No one cares.......
  • Serjustin19
    Serjustin19
    ✭✭✭✭✭
    No one cares.......

    But the one above you does (others as well) ;) Thank you for your comment though :)
    I'm really glad you left a comment though, surely you might of cared? Even just a tiny bit? :blush:
    Edited by Serjustin19 on September 7, 2017 1:49PM
    Formerly Serjustin19, Save for Forum Of Course.... Fiery_Darkness (PC NA) currently.
  • Serjustin19
    Serjustin19
    ✭✭✭✭✭
    geonsocal wrote: »
    when they gathered around me after destroying me and all 5 AD gave a bow to me :)

    I was so amazed, why are these 5 AD doing this? I don't deserve this, especially after what I had done. Each and every day, my mind is becoming clear.

    awwwwwww, that's awesome :) ...good story...

    yes, you are correct - communication is very important to any good relationship(s)...and, seeing how this is an mmo - that definitely holds true for this game...

    AD is you faction, EP is your faction, and if you were so inclined to choose - DC is your faction...zos gives you that gaming choice...

    what i've observed from a cross factional perspective is that those individuals whom do play more than a single alliance - generally have a much smaller group of pvp friends then those whom are faction loyalists...

    so, being a part of more than one alliance is cool - it just comes at a cost (in terms of socializing)...

    Thank you, your right to. Just need work on my social skills though, I think I'll message those AD whom gathered around me and bowed. It’s great but, I'm still interested as to why they did it. Thank you again :)
    Formerly Serjustin19, Save for Forum Of Course.... Fiery_Darkness (PC NA) currently.
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