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Took an arrow in the knee... (Your funny quotes here!)

Nic727
Nic727
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Hi,

I would like to start a topic where everyone can post the best quote(s) he heard in TESO or other Elder scrolls games.
It can be from everyone or everything.

So I'm starting :)

SKYRIM
Got to thinking... maybe I'm the Dragonborn, and I just don't know it yet? - Guard

Player : Not sure... FUS RO DAH
  • Muletide
    Muletide
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    "An undead...werewolf? How does that even work?"
  • [Deleted User]
    [Deleted User]
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    The user and all related content has been deleted.
  • lonewolf26
    lonewolf26
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    You found my Puddles!
    PC-NA CP 1,700+
      Mains:
      [*] Ronno - Khajiit Nightblade - AD - Stamina DPS / Crafter - Master Angler/Flawless Conqueror
      [*] Rönnö - Breton Nightblade - DC - Magicka DPS - Dro-m'Athra Destroyer/Flawless Conqueror
      [*] Wicked Glitch of the West - Altmer Sorceror - AD - Magicka DPS - Dro-m'Athra Destroyer/Flawless Conqueror
      [*] Arashi Maesa - Breton Dragon Knight -AD - Magicka DPS - Flawless Conqueror
      [*] Hoards-Many-Things - Argonian Dragon Knight - DC - Tank
      [*] Andy Rune-eeh - Breton Templar - AD - Healer
      [*] Ser Bob from Accounting - Redguard Dragon Knight - AD - Stamina DPS
      [*] Kittynado - Khajiit Sorceror - AD - Stamina DPS - Flawless Conqueror
      [*] JimmyJJShabadu - Breton Templar - AD - Magicka DPS - Flawless Conqueror
    • jk.turner_ESO
      That's what SHE said!
    • traigusb14_ESO2
      traigusb14_ESO2
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      "Who throws cat *** on people!?!"
    • Aett_Thorn
      Aett_Thorn
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      "That's not normal mushroom behavior. I disapprove!"
    • lastango
      lastango
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      Haven't found too much in ESO yet... though... the Witcher has some awesome ones...

      They have one of my fav Mark Wahlburg quotes from the Departed,,,

      "Maybe, Maybe not, maybe go F yourself"

      and they have a Zed's Dead bit (pulp fiction)
    • traigusb14_ESO2
      traigusb14_ESO2
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      Aett_Thorn wrote: »
      "That's not normal mushroom behavior. I disapprove!"

      That's my 2nd favorite!
    • FilthyMudcrabs
      FilthyMudcrabs
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      "Wood Elves aren't made of wood. Sea Elves aren't made of water. M'aiq still wonders about High Elves."
      Saw a mudcrab the other day. Dreadful creatures.
    • UrQuan
      UrQuan
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      "Wood Elves aren't made of wood. Sea Elves aren't made of water. M'aiq still wonders about High Elves."
      Hey! I already posted that one:
      UrQuan wrote: »
      Wood elves are not made of wood. Sea elves are not made of water. M'aiq still wonders about high elves.
      lol
      Caius Drusus Imperial DK (DC)
      Bragg Ironhand Orc Temp (DC)
      Neesha Stalks-Shadows Argonian NB (EP)
      Falidir Altmer Sorcr (AD)
      J'zharka Khajiit NB (AD)
      Isabeau Runeseer Breton Sorc (DC)
      Fevassa Dunmer DK (EP)
      Manut Redguard Temp (AD)
      Tylera the Summoner Altmer Sorc (EP)
      Svari Snake-Blood Nord DK (AD)
      Ashlyn D'Elyse Breton NB (EP)
      Filindria Bosmer Temp (DC)
      Vigbjorn the Wanderer Nord Warden (EP)
      Hrokki Winterborn Breton Warden (DC)
      Basks-in-the-Sunshine Argonian Temp
      Someone stole my sweetroll
    • Azalin76
      Azalin76
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      I had a guard tell me "come back when you can't stay so long"
    • FilthyMudcrabs
      FilthyMudcrabs
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      UrQuan wrote: »
      Hey! I already posted that one:

      Whoops. Still a classic, though!

      Saw a mudcrab the other day. Dreadful creatures.
    • Enodoc
      Enodoc
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      "Do you know the old saying? Neither a borrower or a lender be? Rubbish! Without borrowers and lenders, how would we ever be able to buy or sell anything?"
      I know this lost its sparkle, but it's still actually a pretty funny quote.

      I also like this line in one of the books:
      "Today, I was assigned a partner to make sure I don't show too much initiative and wander from my post. He's incredibly jaded. It's demoralizing, especially when he keeps complaining about the pain in his knee."
      Also, props to OP for actually getting the arrow quote right.
      UESP: The Unofficial Elder Scrolls Pages - A collaborative source for all knowledge on the Elder Scrolls series since 1995
      Join us on Discord - discord.gg/uesp
    • Syntse
      Syntse
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      Merchant in Grahtwood
      Nagaddu: "Some call this junk. This one? This one also call this junk, resell it at deep discount."
      Syntse Dominion Khajiit Dragonknight Stamina Tank [50]
      Ra'Syntse Dominion Khajiit Nightblade Magica DPS [50]
      Syntselle Dominion Dark Elf Dragonknight Magica DPS [50]
      Syntseus Dominion Imperial Templar Healer [50]
      Syntsetar Dominion High Elf Sorcerer Magica DPS [50]
      Friar Tuktuk Daggerfall Brenton Templar Healer [50]
      Syntseyn Ebonheart Brenton Nightblade Magica DPS [50]
    • Nifty2g
      Nifty2g
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      ***+niggly+wiggly+i+almost+cried_297f53_5219807.jpg
      #MOREORBS
    • Flameheart
      Flameheart
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      See signature..

      Molag Bal (after defeating random anchor in Tamriel): "Sometimes the prey turns and nips us... it is a small thing"

      I just like it how the developers could express the whole personality of an utter arrogant daedric deity within one sentence/phrase :-)

      Edited by Flameheart on July 22, 2015 10:43AM
      Sometimes the prey turns and nips us... it's a small thing.

      So let the snow flakes and unicorns dance alone until they melt or vanish from existence, we will finish up with those smart enough to stay in the glowing circle of love.

      Selissi - CP 1k+ Redguard Stamina Nightblade (Ebonheart Pact)
      Silmerel - CP 1k+ Breton Magicka Templar (Ebonheart Pact)
      Sunja - CP 1k+ Dunmer Magicka Nightblade (Ebonheart Pact)
      Suldreni - CP 1k+ Dunmer Magicka Dragonknight (Ebonheart Pact)
      Sulhelka - CP 1k+ Altmer Magicka Sorcerer (Ebonheart Pact)
      Sylundine - CP 1k+ Breton Magicka Warden (Ebonheart Pact)







    • Weesacs
      Weesacs
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      Some of the guard quotes are brilliant - here are my two favourites that always get me to lol (this is on DC):

      "There are no rules here, but I'll tell you when you break any."

      And ...

      "If you want to lose ten pounds of ugly fat, I'd be happy to chop off your head"
      High Elf Templar
      PS4 - EU - DC
      Over 37,500 Achievements!
    • UTG_Zilla
      UTG_Zilla
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      "I find you attractive, maybe If we met under other circumstances" - male guard while confronting my male toon of theft
    • JD2013
      JD2013
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      That's not you I smell . . . Is it?
      Sweetrolls for all!

      Benoit Christophe Raziel III - Breton Mage of Winterhold. Dwemer and Daedric Scholar. EU DC
      Marius Palenix - Imperial Nightblade from Kvatch, Thief, Assassin and Fisherman. EU DC
      Christophe Mottierre - Breton Templar with his own whole darn estate! Templar Houses are so 2015. EU DC

      PC Beta Tester January 2014

      Elder of The Black
      Order of Sithis
      The Runners

      @TamrielTraverse - For Tamriel related Twitter shenanigans!
      https://tamrieltraveller.wordpress.com/

      Crafting bag OP! ZOS nerf pls!
    • bertenburnyb16_ESO
      bertenburnyb16_ESO
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      Stay moist
      Haze Ramoran Dunmer Dragonknight Tank/Dps – Smoked-Da-Herb Saxheel Templar Tank/Healer

      Red Diamond, Protect us 'til the end (EU EP Thorn)
    • tinythinker
      tinythinker
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      I like this one because it links two different games...

      Sing along: "Flyyyying, flyying in the skyyyyyyyyy!"



      Edited by tinythinker on July 22, 2015 2:20PM
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      Support Mudcrab Mode for ESO (\/)!_!(\/) - part joke, part serious, all glorious! You butter be ready for this
    • Tobius
      Tobius
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      a quest in Grahtwood don't know the whole thing, but '.... your arrow looks a quiver...' I laugh every time I do the quest and hear that.
      "Remember: Sometime the Dragon wins."
    • WhiteCoatSyndrome
      WhiteCoatSyndrome
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      *in perfectly normal conversational voice* "You lot can murder your friend on the way to Velyn Harbor." Glanir was so fun during that quest. XD
      #proud2BAStarObsessedLoony
      PAWS (Positively Against Wrip-off Stuff) - Say No to Crown Crates!
      A useful explanation for how RNG works
    • Mitchblue
      Mitchblue
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      Shock me, say something intelligent.
      Anyone else rooting for Molag Bal?
    • FilthyMudcrabs
      FilthyMudcrabs
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      "It's a Nord legend! Of course it's true!"
      Saw a mudcrab the other day. Dreadful creatures.
    • templesus
      templesus
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      "Oh look its the 3 muskaqueers again!
    • Alucardo
      Alucardo
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      UTG_Zilla wrote: »
      "I find you attractive, maybe If we met under other circumstances" - male guard while confronting my male toon of theft

      wuXI9wI.jpg
      (sqweee )>--- ۜ\(סּںסּَ` )/ۜ
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